No, I am Not Ultra-Conservative

No, I am Not Ultra-Conservative

Some of you are ultra-conservative but I am not. I wear dresses and skirts just above my knees because this is where Ken likes me to wear them. I would wear them to the floor, if this is what he wanted from me. I even wear shorts once in a while around my home and some of my thigh shows. (One woman told me there is a verse about the thigh not showing so I asked her for it but she never responded.) I watch some TV (Hallmark, Fox News, The Duggars and The Bates Shows, and a few others) and go to the movie theater (but am careful about what I see – no nudity, sex scenes, vulgar language, etc.).

Recently, someone grabbed a picture that my daughter-in-law posted on her Instagram story of me with a skirt on with shorts underneath and some of my thigh showing. It was the Fourth of July and I was with my sons and their families and Ken. My legs were up on a footstool so more of my thigh shows than normal. (I have posted a picture of the jean skirt I was wearing that almost comes down to my knees when standing and I always wear shorts underneath it.)

If I knew my daughter-in-law was filming me and even if another man besides my sons or husband were around, I would have put my feet down on the ground but I didn’t know and had no clue that some woman would use it against me but this is what they do. They search and scour everything I write and every picture they can find about me (even from my children and their spouses) to try to destroy my ministry and make me into a hypocrite.

My family knows about it and they think it’s silly because they all know that I dress modestly. I never wear leggings unless I have a dress over it. I never wear low-cut tops, bikinis, short shorts, or a short skirt or dress. My modesty standards may not be the same as yours (some women were upset with a comment Ken made about some thigh showing) but that doesn’t mean we are wrong. I listen to godly men and what they consider immodest and dress accordingly. I don’t believe we need to wear burkas (as some women have told us) and cover our hair, faces, shoulders, and ankles. This isn’t what the typical man lusts after.

I have heard that some men have foot fetishes but this doesn’t mean we can never go barefoot. This is a problem with the men and yes, there are men who are perverts and will lust no matter what women wear but this isn’t our problem. It’s theirs. As godly women, we need to know how the typical man thinks and dress to not be a stumbling block to them.

No, I am not Amish and I’m not Mennonite or ultra-conservative, I am a believer in Jesus Christ and I love His ways. My greatest desire is to walk in obedience to Him. It’s the least that I can do for all He’s done for me. I am careful with what I see, what I wear, and what I do but my standards may not be the same as yours and this is okay. This is where our freedom in Christ comes; not to walk in sin, but to walk in obedience according to His Word, not legalism.

Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.
Galatians 5:1

57 thoughts on “No, I am Not Ultra-Conservative

  1. I don’t want to debate with anybody about modesty, just want to say that’s one subject where we have, as Christians, to demonstrate LOVE in all his aspects (1 Corinthians 13.4-7).

    Yet it is super important to study modesty and search with God’s help and our husband’s help what modesty should be like in our life. I think that’s it!

    Thanks, Lori and Ken. for sharing your perspective, which is very personal to each one. Thanks for your openness !

    Hope that this “debate” doesn’t discourage you. It takes a lot of courage to expose your views like you did !
    Blessings to you !!

  2. Thank you, Daniele, and no, it doesn’t discourage me at all. Anyone who teaches godly womanhood, especially in today’s culture, can expect to be slandered but we have nothing to fear for God has already won the battle!

  3. I wonder if the verse Exodus 28:42 would be what the lady was referring to. Where it says that the garment should cover Aarons nakedness and then goes on to clarify from the loins to the thigh.

    If this is not referring to the thigh being nakedness can you please explain what this verse refers to. Thank you for all you do.

  4. Thank you for pointing this verse out to me. I searched for it but could not find it. “And thou shalt make them linen breeches to cover their nakedness; from the loins even unto the thighs they shall reach:” It doesn’t say that it must cover the entire thigh.

    Elliot’s Commentary has this to say about this verse: “Drawers reaching from the waist to a little above the knee were the sole garment of many in Egypt, a necessary garment of all.” I wear my dresses and skirts a “little above the knee.”

    Jamieson-Fausset Brown Commentary states it this way: “linen breeches—drawers, which encompassed the loins and reached half way down the thighs. They are seen very frequently represented in Egyptian figures.” This one states “half way down the thighs” so there are variations what this verse means exactly but even so, we are no longer under the Law at all, thankfully.

  5. Thank u for standing for what u believe in. I grew up in an ultra conservative church and so did my husband. There came a time in our lives when we had to change some of our views and ask God what he thought about things. We have been talked about and even looked down on. But some of those kind of people love finding fault with people. I appricate you and have so much enjoyed reading your book and your blog. It has been a help to me many times. So don’t let those people discourage u. Keep up the good work.

  6. Thank you, Michelle. They have been trying to discourage me since I began blogging over six years ago but thankfully, my strength and joy comes from the Lord!

  7. I can see you will not post my comments due to the facts that you know in your heart that your wrong. When someone tried to edify you, you don’t listen to what anyone has to say. It’s pretty sad for you to be a so called godly women bUT yet cannot take correction when its offered. For awhile I have tried to reason with you but you won’t hear anything I have to say so I say so long to this blog and I’ll keep my comments to myself….hope to see you in the kingdom…smh

  8. I listen to what everyone says to me but it doesn’t mean I agree with them, and I don’t agree with you on this issue. I may someday since my convictions change because I always want to be open to the Lord’s leading and be submissive to my husband’s wishes.

    I rarely wear shorts now because of this and am wearing a lot more skirts and dresses just above my knees but I am sure that this isn’t going to keep me out of the kingdom. Also, I believe we have many of the same convictions and I have posted the majority of your comments but when you write the same ones over and over again and I disagree with them, I stop posting them.

    Finally and most importantly, we are not saved by anything we do, but what Christ has done for us, thankfully.

  9. Lori as believers we are called to a higher level of Holiness. We are called to walk in obedience to Him only. I don’t understand how can you say that wearing a skirt above the knees is okay but when you sit down the skirt rises to about thigh level…how is this modest?

  10. When I sit with my feet on the ground, my skirts are almost to my knees and I make sure of this (except on the few occasions that I am in my home). Most of my dresses are stretchy material so as I sit, I pull them down over my knees.

  11. I would certainly not regard your choice of clothing as anything other than mainstream. Certainly not ultraconservative in any way. My husband would not allow me to wear skirts that short or shorts (for example).

    But the fact that you believe as I do that your husband has the authority to guide you and that you would not wear clothing of which he did not approve is (sadly) regarded as very conservative.

  12. The way I dress is certainly not mainstream where I live, Susanne. It’s considered conservative but yes, learning to please and submit to our husbands is important to the Lord so it should be important to us, too!

  13. I am a Mennonite, not an ultra conservative one, but I sew my dresses and for our daughters. To me, being a Mennonite is more like a lifestyle not at all my saving grace, and so I believe there are other ways of modesty than the way I dress. You dress much more modest than the mainstream. And even though we may wear long dressesas, wear a veiling ( I do wear one), or maybe never go barefoot (I wear flip flops)… we can be proud, unsubmissive to our husband, unkind, gossip… I tend to think modesty also includes issues in the heart. I have had friends that seemed to live as if being Mennonite was their saving grace, and so they wanted freedom in Christ, and when they come around gushing about how they are so free in Christ, while wearing Very short skirts, and tight tank tops, I think that modesty needs to start in our hearts.

  14. As a child of Christ, and a working mom, who happens to not be a size 6 .. I also do not believe those two things will keep me from my saviors kingdom..I believe you do try to be just and right in what you post but you dont always see others point of view if theydon’t match your interpretation of scripture …It is not what you say sometimes it how you say it…Example saying you are sure you won’t not get into the kingdom of heaven because….whatever you choose, but others are condemned because they might work, etc… this is not meant to be disrespectful of you, just an observation…Sometimes just like you aid when approaching your husband on something in a certain way can get him on defense.. you tend to do that to other women who differ in personality than you..something to consider

  15. I have never said that working moms are condemned. I teach women to be keepers at home since I am instructed to do this and I know it is best for the children but I don’t condemn anyone. Only God has the power to do this and it will be all those who “hold the truth in unrighteousness” and refuse to repent of their sins and believe in Him.

  16. I agree with you, Dorcas. Modesty definitely involves a heart transformation; for it shouldn’t come as a list of do’s and don’ts but out of a heart of love and devotion that wants to please the Lord in all that we do.

  17. I believe there are 2 schools of thought about women’s modesty among conservative Christians. One is that dressing appropriately without seeking to draw attention to oneself is modest. This is a subjective view of modesty and seems to be your family’s view. The other is the establishment of rules such as not showing shoulders, cleavage, midriff, or thighs and wearing nothing form-fitting. This is an objective view of modesty. As an adult woman and mature Christian I have no trouble with the subjective view. However, as a mom of two daughters, I need to enforce the objective view because they are always looking for exceptions and they find yoga pants “comfortable” and a low-cut tank tops “cute” and do not consider that they are also alluring. Since we have established rules for them, I also abide by them to set a good example.

  18. Some years ago our family left a church that was ultra conservative for a little bit more “liberal” church. Ultra conservative being skirts down to the ground, never going to the movies, etc. Liberal being wearing pants and not having to hide the fact that your family went to the ocean for a vacation…

    The funny thing is at the conservative church, all the emphasis was put on rules/how things looked on the outside, thus although you could never go see a movie, you were free to rent all manner of filth, be a 100 pounds overweight (thus unattractive to your husband), and so much more.
    At our new church, for the first time I realized how much the Bible had to say about the heart and I began to do many things from the heart and quit doing many things from the heart-example…I now have the freedom to go and see a movie but have not been to one nor rented very many in years. I have no desire to fund hollywood’s evil.
    We sadly lost many good friends because we went to the world in their eyes and I am sorry for that but I honestly have so much joy now. I love church and go now because I want to, not because I have to.
    Most of my friends would be shocked to know that with the exception of dress, my standards are actually higher now in many if not all areas.

  19. I believe that most Christian men want their wives to look pretty but not immodest so this is where the balance hangs in figuring out what exactly is modest. Like I have said numerous times, I have set my modesty standards by what godly, honest men have told me since I believe they would know best what causes men to lust and what is immodest.

    Thank you for your comment, Lori! Yes, we teach our daughters modesty but it’s dealing with their hearts and praying that they have soft, teachable hearts to all the ways of the Lord that is the most important.

  20. Whilst I do get the point that what we wear is influenced by culture and the activity we are doing my own view is that we do also need to set some absolutes about what is acceptable to show in public.

    The Biblical definition of nakedness must be our base and although this debate illustrates that interpretations vary it must be accepted that to show the breasts, genitals, buttocks, the immediate area around those areas or which lead the eye to them must be wrong.

    It is this final part which leads my husband to insist that my skirts cover my knees, but I know that he like many conservative men would prefer that women covered their legs completely.

  21. I am sorry for all the judgement coming your way. It seems some know as much as God in order to question your eternity.
    I have read your blog for years and have not once read where you have judged someone’s soul. I have seen where you judge actions as being holy or unholy but never one’s soul. I do not have an issue as to how you dress. I think Southern California (coastal areas in general) dress less conservatively on a daily basis but I have enough issues in my own life that I don’t have the right to condemn others. I honestly think you do a lot more exhorting and teaching. I don’t think you have ever condemned others (or raged about them being a hypocrite like they love to do you). Those women need to be nice!
    Rom. 14
    4 Who are you to judge the [a]servant of another? To his own [b]master he stands or falls; and he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand.

  22. Isaiah 47 might be what the lady was referring to about uncovering the thigh.

  23. I like the styles from modli.co

    Orthodox jewish styles are pretty good with conservative christian value.

  24. Wear long dresses? Oh no, way too conservative!! Wear some jeans or a skirt that shows a tiny bit of thigh? Oh no, the horror!! I am being sarcastic here, people that don’t like you are going to find something to criticize whatever you do. All your clothes look normal to me.

  25. Submissive, I have been a part of and known of very conservative churches. Who are strictly dresses only. And i have lost count over the number of families and individuals severely hurt ,torn apart and devestated because they were looked down upon and didnt dress modestly enough in their eyes. They are amongst some of the most callous,gossiping and spiteful women i have ever laid eyes on. Pkease understand. I love dresses and skirts. They are lovely. But i can dress as modestly as i want, but if i take on a judgemental, ‘holier than thou’ attitude, then i am not demonstrating Christs love,mercy and grace. Modest dress alone wont get you into heaven. I wont be cast into the eternal fire for wearing shorts,butall i keep hearing in you comments is a holier than thou attitude. And i find it so sad. If a husband insists on shorts. She is not in sin. But if she wore a skirt because she felt she was trying to obey the Lord first, then she would be in open rebellion against her husband. There needs to be an element of grace. And i can tell you now that men in bible times typically wore dresses.fishermen in particular. They would tuck the end of their dress into a wide belt or sash so the garment wouldnt get wet. So were they being diobedient and dressing like women? No, they wore what was modest,culturally the norm and suitable for the task and living conditions. I spoke to a farmers wife who had worn dresses for years on and off the farm. And she said the stress of trying to make sure she looked acceptable and could go thru her daily farm duties almost killed her. So when on the farm. She wears pants. And still looks lovely,feminine and modest. There are some cultures and situations when wearing anything other than shorts or pants is foolish. A woman only needs to dress to her husbands requests and the Lord. If he is wrong, then God will deal with him.

  26. Hi Lori!

    Just thought I’d share the verses in Scripture about the uncovering of the thigh being nakedness.

    Isaiah 47:2-3 (KJV)

    2 Take the millstones, and grind meal: uncover thy locks, make bare the leg, uncover the thigh, pass over the rivers.

    3 Thy nakedness shall be uncovered, yea, thy shame shall be seen: I will take vengeance, and I will not meet thee as a man.

    I respect the fact that you seek your husband’s input on this matter, as all wives should. When I was married, I dressed to please my husband, although it made me very uncomfortable, as he didn’t believe in modesty. Now as a single woman, I’m able to dress according to the standards I had before marriage (skirts past the knees, nothing sleeveless or low cut).

  27. Hi Lori, I’d like to recommend a website for shopping, if that’s okay. Maybe you already know about it. It’s called ThredUP, and it’s like an online thrift store with many name brands, even some designer brands, at very reasonable prices. It’s preowned clothing but they don’t accept anything unless it’s in excellent condition. I recently bought 3 skirts for $20 total. I’m just mentioning it because they have a lot of modest clothing (long skirts, skirts to the knee) on their site. Blessings! Love your writing.

  28. Anon please explain a holier than though attitude? The point I’m trying to make is being obedient. Which no one wants to address. It’s never just one thing that keeps you from the kingdom, it’s a plethora of things which lines up with disobedience. I have never condemned anyone, I said if they don’t repent….the key word is If….I don’t follow commentaries, or these men who think they are God…I follow the scriptures. Is the scripture not enough?

  29. If you take from my comments that I have a holier than though attitude, then I guess you see Jesus the same way. He rebuked disobedience not sparing anyone’s emotions. Isaiah58:1. Jesus Christmas of the bible is nothe the same god that the churches of today describe. He is a God of order, not confusion, He gives grace to the humble…for he said “be ye holy as I am holy” HolInes is what will get you to the kingdom, not emotions..

  30. Good grief! Do some of these commenters not understand the concept of forgiveness and grace?? That salvation is forever- not given or taken away at will. By requiring all these “legalistic rules” of themselves, they are demonstrating that what Christ did for us on the cross is not enough. We are to walk everyday in obedience, but I PROMISE YOU that showing a little thigh is not something that will affect someone’s ticket to heaven. People need to understand that conviction comes from the Holy Spirit and that my convictions are not the same as yours or hers or his or my neighbors. Nobody has the power to convict another and someone’s salvation surely does not depend on trivial matters.

    I am sorry you are dealing with these naysayers and people with the wrong idea. Follow your own convictions and where the Holy Spirit leads you. This world is corrupt, and suffice it to say- people that believe in circumstantial salvation only contribute to this corruption will be left behind.

  31. Shelly it’s sad. You say conviction comes from the Holy spirit but if we all have the same spirit why is it that we cannot agree to basics foundations of Scripture? Thank God I don’t trust in your promises because they are flawed. But the promises of Christ are eternal when we walk in obedience to His desires not our own…btw, we are grown women here so if you want to address anyone here directly then do so. Don’t shy away when someone is challenging your beliefs..smh…yes it so sad…

  32. I’m sorry- what? Address someone directly? I didn’t have anyone specific in mind. I was making a blanket statement that salvation is eternal. Never changing. SALVATION was for all sin committed and yet to be. As a Christian, I specifically have a daily relationship with Christ and my convictions are mine. Never should a head of a church or any other religious entity be able to tell me what those are, because guess what- those are people. Not God. And I CERTAINLY would not base my beliefs on a bunch of women who cling to salvation through legalism.
    Anything outside of a relationship with Christ, my savior, and obedience to God is nothing but the practice of religious doctrine.
    I never once said that anyone’s ideas of modesty or submission to her husband is wrong. In fact- I believe those ideals are right. I just don’t hang my salvation on it as many here profess to do.
    Your works, your obedience will never get you into heaven. If they did- we would have no need for Christ and his selfless act.
    Really- Submissive- your entire argument is built on semantics. I am fairly certain the only thing this conversation boils down to is obedience. And obedience, or “the law” was finished upon Christ’s crucifiction. So- again- was that not good enough for YOUR salvation?
    Sure- we are to obey, but that’s a fairly gray area. Do you keep kosher? Do you not live with modern conveniences? Do you pray a certain way? Wash a certain way at a certain time?
    I mean- there are thousands of laws. Where you draw your line might be different than mine but true salvation is NOT dependent on those things. Our salvation is IN CHRIST ALONE, and I hope one day you can truly be saved.

  33. Oh and btw Submissive- God is CERTAINLY more concerned with each person’s character than their stupid willingness to follow old laws. So…..the “same Holy Spirit” you mention…… yes. He is the same. Never changing. BUT- God is a BIG GOD and works on each person according to their own spiritual needs. So what He does for me certainly won’t be the same for you.
    Quit putting God in a box

  34. And quit hiding behind an anonymous name. I though we were all grown women here. ?

  35. Your “holier than thou” attitude comes from writing things like *smh* and taking it upon yourself to (in your words) “correct” Lori and others by your own standards. If you were to share with them your understanding of scripture, that is different than “correcting” them when they are not under your authority nor did they ask you to. Finally your “holier than thou” attitude comes across in comments like these “I can see you will not post my comments due to the facts that you know in your heart that your wrong.” How do you know Lori’s heart? Are you God, no. You are a fallible woman. To claim you know her heart is claiming you are on par with God and that you are not.

  36. I will start this stating that I am a man. That out of the way let me comment. This is a subject my wife and I discuss when we have gone clothes shopping for her and my daughter. We also have discussed it because of positions we have held in our home school groups. Like Lori, my wife looks to me to help define what is modest and immodest for us. We have general rules for us and our family. We do not hold others to those same rules. We do share what we believe is modest and immodest but we do not say to others that your salvation depends on your definition of modesty.

    Second our church was started in part as a refuge of those of us who grew up or went to legalistic churches where everything in life was dictated and part of the church’s doctrinal statements, constitution, and by-laws. If you were to be a part of the churches we came from you had to agree on everything they said in those documents. And guess what those documents could not be changed unless the pastor asked for them to be changed. The founding members of the church believed first in plural elder rule not single pastor rule. They also believed in grace. Not all Christians are at the same level in their Christian walk. Likewise not all Christians needed to be treated as little children with every action in their life to be dictated by they pastor or the church. This was especially true in dress. Now most of us agree on what is modest and have similar self rules as what Lori and Ken have. Others have a little more stringent and other a little less stringent. However the modesty of dress is not what saves us it is what we believe and how we produce the fruits of the spirit in our lives. Our dictating to others what is modest is not a fruit of the spirit. Now the older women do share with the younger women how to dress and how to find modest clothes for reasonable costs, how to cook better meals (more recipes are passed back and forth than anything else), and how to train the children (we are one of the few churches that fully see homeschooling first, private Christian schools second, and public schools only as a last resort). Not much is taught on loving the husbands except through demonstration. We also teach that because of what Christ did on the cross and in His resurrection, we have been made holy. None of our works make us holy unless except for the one act of accepting God into our lives by accepting the gift of His Son. We then follow the Law of loving God wiht all our heart, mind, and soul and loving our neighbor’s as ourselves.

    One last thought. We have a general rule of thumb on rules and how to live our lives. Is this something we are doing because of our love for God and what he did for us, similar to what a wife is to do for her husband. OR is this something we do because it is a rule we have to, believing that it will save us or maintain our salvation. In other words what is the motive for the rule or guideline – our love for God or seeking to get more love from God?

  37. Yes!!! Truth in point! Thank you for sharing from a man’s perspective. Refreshing.

  38. I’ve always wondered why the Lord didn’t just put modesty rules for us in the Bible so that we wouldn’t have to think it through so hard and struggle with it! But then, since He hasn’t written those “rules” in black and white, it forces us to really seek His heart in the matter, to really examine our hearts and our motives, and that is something that glorifies the Lord and affects all areas of our lives. Lori, I think you dress great, especially considering you live in California! May the Lord continue to bless you!

  39. Lol wow look at the emotions that’s coming from your hearts. Smh I’m holier than thou because I addressed Loris stance and now here you all go with your “blanket statements” and telling me to “take a nap”. Nothing but emotions. Lori can defend herself and she does it well. She doesn’t need a fan club to speak for her…Lol relax…

  40. No one is still addressing the issue of obedience according to scripture. Do you really think you can do whatever you want and God being so Holy will let you enter into His kingdom? You can say I believe all you want but in your works you deny Him. What does it when the scripture says faith without works is dead? I’m not talking about the law of Moses which I think a lot of you think that I am which I am not…I don’t come with contention but I do come to edify. I posted many scriptures relating to the topic on other post but it’s the same thing with you women. You get caught up in your emotions instead of just searching the scriptures to show you self approved. Faith and obedience goes together…you can’t have one without the other. Enough said

  41. No- I do not think I can do whatever I want. Never have. It’s a comfort knowing I have a father in heaven who expects things of me. But even the murderer on death row can accept Christ and WILL BE REUNITED in heaven.

    It has nothing to do with emotions. It is right vs wrong and I’m sorry that you cannot see God’s grace for what it is. We can NEVER MEASURE UP- thus the need for a savior.
    What He calls YOU to is not the same for everyone so just go about your merry way in obedience and keep your mouth closed about others. You will be shocked at who you see in heaven, and I can’t wait!

  42. You specifically asked, “Anon please explain a holier than though attitude?” and when you are told you brush it off as “emotion”. Your words are not my emotions. I told you how you were by specifically stating what you said but you do not want to hear it. You sit yourself on the judgement seat (since you claim to know Lori’s heart) and refuse to accept that you are indeed sitting in judgement of others.

    Concerning your current challenge. I do indeed believe we are to obey God and Jesus as Jesus said “4 You are My friends if you do what I command you.” and “5 “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.” The issue I have is that you claim to come to “edify” (build up) yet you are tearing down by your derisive attitude. Your own statement can be said of you too “It’s pretty sad for you to be a so called godly women bUT yet cannot take correction when its offered. ”

    Other women on this thread have pointed to some good scripture to contemplate what “covering one’s nakedness is, and they have done so by sharing not “correct” or judging hearts. That is a better way.

  43. The early church had its struggles as well, including whether it was okay to eat meat that had previously been offered to idols. Here are some verses that, although speaking of meat, have nuggets that can be applied to us today as well…

    “Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another. For meat destroy not the work of God. All things indeed are pure; but it is evil for that man who eateth with offence. It is good neither to eat flesh, not to drink wine, nor any thing whereby thy brother stumbleth, or is offended, or is made weak. Hast thou faith? Have it to thyself before God. Happy is he that condemneth not himself in that thing which he alloweth. And he that doubteth is damned if he eat, because he eateth not of faith: for whatsoever is not of faith is sin.” (Rom. 14:19-23)

    It’s interesting that the Lord didn’t just give it to them in black and white either. He seems to sometimes “leave us hanging” forcing us to really seek His HEART in the matter.

  44. Submissive:
    That just shows that you didn’t read any of those comments you refer to. How can a group of people effectively debate or discuss anything if someone can only prepare what he/she will say next and not truly take to heart what he/she is being told?
    I can pick out key words and build any argument on them – it’s just not effective. I really hope that you are fulfilled by your relationship with Christ, and that you have stamina for the rest of your faith journey; for it will be long, sister. I am finished attempting to have an educated discussion. It is futile.
    God speed.

  45. Dear Submissive,

    I used to be like you, it seems. I was so busy pushing Obedience to everyone around me that I forgot grace. I still can be that way. I can get so hung up on things and jam “truth” (whether it be real truth or what I just believe to be truth) at people without speaking to them in love and grace. That is not edifying nor does it encourage my brothers and sisters in Christ. Christ admonished the ones who thought they were doing everything right (while they looked down on others)…Would He be pleased with how you are handling this situation ~ over a few inches of length of a skirt!?

    What it all boils down to is simply this, my sister in Christ, all of everything I do is but filthy rags in comparison to Christ’s holiness. I am wretched in and of myself. Thankfully, the Lord saved me due to His magnificent grace. He pulled me out of the miry pit! Not because I wore the right clothes or because I was obedient enough….but because He chose to! What glory I owe Him! And in that ~ there comes such joy and love for my Savior that I desire to dress (and obey in other areas) in a way that pleases Him. The simple fact that Lori and other women *are* focused on trying to dress modestly and honorably (for their husband and the Lord) shows their love for Him. It is likely that those who do not love the Lord could care less about trying to please Him. We should rejoice that other sisters in Christ truly desire to dress modestly!
    If you felt the need to correct Lori….you could do so once, privately by contacting her. Then let it drop. She is not so grossly in error (if at all) that it needs to be beaten over and over again. If you truly believe she is wrong….pray for her. Love her as a sister in Christ and pray. Pray for yourself as well to be softened and corrected if perhaps *you* are wrong.

    We must remember that if we are all believers…we are sisters in Christ. We are to love one another and want each other’s good! The Lord is good, slow to anger and the true definition of LOVE! :o) Isn’t it such a beautiful thing that Christ stood in our place as the pure sacrifice/substitute we needed? We would be damned without Him! Praise His glorious Name! May we have unity my sisters….remembering that secondary issues are not worth this discord!

    With warm affection,
    Katy

  46. Hi katy,,thank you for responding so warmly. I’m not proud where I can’t humble myself and say Im wrong. My stance on modesty does not change but there is a better way to bring it forth. Proverbs 13:10 Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom. So to Lori I apologize for causing contention on your blog. This is your blog, not mine. It was not in order for me to do that. So for that I apologize Lori.

  47. Submissive,
    I was preparing to answer you, making sure i quoted all relevant scripture and practical examples. But then i realised id have more chance trying to convict my 10 month old child. As she is only wearing a top and a nappy. (Diaper) You believe you are right and have taken the high road. And that you will get brownie points for doing so. In my experience your attempt to quote scripture to back up your points is ridiculously out of context. And does not match up with historical and cultural evidence either. You walk into a group of canabalistic tribes people to evangelise them with your attitude you are likely to end up as lunch. You are very disrespectful to anyone who politely disagrees with you. Unless they grovel. And i find it repulsive. Your speech is not littered with grace. But pride and sarcasm.

  48. Typical response from a emotional women as expected. You won’t have to worry about me anymore because I will not be leaving comments anymore on this forum…and your childish insults comparing me to a ten month child? Smh….Jesus said become as a child which I see many of you won’t do….but so long you won’t be hearing from me anymore…keep your pride…I’m done.

  49. Dont let the door hit you on the way out. *waves*.

    Where i live, it is home to the second deadliest land snake in the world. And locals insisted that during snake season ,long,thick pants and heavy boots are essential. Unless you want to get bitten and end up 6 feet under. Wear skirts and dresses at your own risk. If im out and about i wear long dresses. Working in the yard or messy clean up jobs i wear pants. Being careful to not wear pants toi tight around the groin or buttocks. Sometimes i wear a longer top just incase. I generally dont judge other peoples dress standards unless they are obviously innapropriate. (Breasts out, very tight tops ,shorts,skirts or pants etc.) I may mention the topic of what modesty means to them privately. But then i leave it. We may all share the same Holy spirit. But particually for 1st generation Christians, some topics are too heavy for them. And so there is a period of grace. They are on the milk of the word. The meat of the word is too heavy straight off. Submissive, regardless of if you are right or not. It seems that you think as soon as one is saved, they should be on the meat of the word. There is no grace and growth period in your mind. Try explaining that to tribes people. You can think and express what you believe respectfully. And leave it to the Lord to work on someones heart in that area…But you seem to not understand or approve of that method.

  50. Humbling yourself isn’t easy, submissive, but is truly the best thing. Never compromise your convictions…but always share with grace and love. This is a lesson I am learning as well. 🙂

    If you even read this….I saw your comment at the bottom. I don’t think you need to quit commenting here. I think you (and each of us) need to just think very carefully before we speak/type to make sure we are full of love and grace. :o) You may have valuable things to add to the conversations.

    Warmly,
    Katy 🙂

  51. Lori,
    You are to be commended for even attempting to tackle such a subject… You don’t owe anyone and explanation of what you wear. If you feel it please’s God and your Honey ..Go For it !!!
    Because that’s who you have to give and account to , in the end….No One Else!
    It’s not my job to say what’s what for your life.
    God is a faithful God! He know’s just what we have need of ….We can get so tangled up in other’s view about us, that we loose focus .
    There is a lost world that needs Jesus !
    When I need prayer I didn’t care if that person had sleeves down to their fingertips , or skirt’s that drag the ground , I want someone who can get a hold Of a GOD that can change my life and and help me with the trouble I’m facing…..I am from a Holiness Background and I believe in Holiness , But it only works , when we get past all the standards and clothes . I’m not throwing nothing out here nor am I shaming this doctrine. But …I don’t have time worrying about what Ms. Lori is wearing ….If She is reaching other’s for Christ…What can we say…..But Praise God for you Sis. keep on ! The Devil wants to steal, Kill, and destroy….
    and I’m not going to let him

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