To Warrior Wives of Straying Husbands

To Warrior Wives of Straying Husbands

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Written By Robin Jennifer

I just want to encourage any wife who is standing for her marriage in the face of infidelity. Personally, I know the pain, as this is why I divorced my first husband twenty-three years ago, (and at the time, in my ignorance, I felt completely justified). He went on to marry The Other Woman (or the “strange” woman, as the Bible calls them) after our divorce was final; I may never know if he may have chosen differently had I chosen to stand in faith for our marriage restoration. The LORD has redeemed the years that the locust ate, in many ways, yet my adult son still suffers from our choices.

Ladies, if you are standing for your marriage, trusting the LORD to use you to be a minister of reconciliation, may I offer suggestions for what NOT to do, and what TO do, as you stand:

1. Resist insecurity. He isn’t with her because you are a failure as a wife, or because she’s prettier, or sexier, or better in bed. He isn’t with her because you are less than her. He isn’t with her because you are boring. He is with her because he has been ensnared by the LIAR and is being used by the THIEF to try to steal your marriage. Period. It’s not about you. So, turn your thoughts to rescuing him: ezer (ancient word used in Bible for helper (wife) means, according to Rabbi David Freedman, the word ezer is a combination of two roots, meaning “to rescue/to save” and “strength”. The Hebrew word ezer is a combination of two roots: `-z-r, meaning “to rescue, to save,” and g-z-r, meaning “to be strong.” So, be strong for your man and “rescue” him from the snare of the fowler by cooperating with the Spirit of God within you. Kenegdo (the second word in “help meet”) means “corresponding to him”, “suitable to him”. So, think of yourself cooperating with Jesus to rescue/save/be strong for your husband, as YOU are the one God made to be suitable for this job for him! What an HONOR and privilege! The LORD is your security; your Strong Tower and place of Refuge as you are rescuing your husband.

2. Tame your tongue. The power of life and death is within the tongue (Proverbs 18:21). NEVER speak insecurely or victimized around your husband. You ARE more than a conqueror in Christ! Take these thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ immediately. IF you are tempted to say, “I just want you to love me like you love HER!” or “I see the way you want her – why don’t you want ME that way?”, TOSS those thoughts BEFORE they become words. Remember point one: you are STRONG, and working as rescuer for him, and God is YOUR rescuer when your husband needs you to be strong.

3. Bless your husband whenever possible. The word for bless is eulogeo, from which we derive the word “eulogy”. No one ever speaks poorly of another in a eulogy; we are to “speak well of” the one who is “despitefully using you” and “persecuting you”, separating the person from the principality trying to bind them to wickedness. Further, bless the other woman. Do not speak poorly of her; pray the Word over her life that she might enjoy salvation. This is loving her with agape love. Oh, you can do as Jesus did and curse the root and fruit of the (lust-based) relationship, and trust that it WILL dry up and die (the sinful relationship), just as the fig tree that Jesus cursed (Matt. 21:19). But when speaking of the other woman, to curse her is to cooperate with the adversary instead of cooperating with the Holy Spirit. This can only be done by His power and strength in you, but He is well able to empower you by His limitless grace! The LORD is your Source of the Word of blessing, even as you feel cursed. Remember point two, and SPEAK LIFE!

Be encouraged, Warrior Wives of straying husbands. The LORD is your Salvation as you war in rescuing strength for your husband’s salvation! The LORD is your Helper (John 14:26) to contain your thoughts and tongue, teaching you all things as you wisely navigate these waters. The LORD is your graceful Source of LIFE and blessing, giving sweet and Living Water flowing out of you toward your husband, and even the other woman, as a minister of reconciliation!

The LORD shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace.
Exodus 14:14

Were We Created to Marry Young?

Were We Created to Marry Young?

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Guest Post by Celina Hernandez

Not long ago it was the norm in America (and still is in a good part of the world) to be having sex (and having children) at sixteen years old. Our grandparents (or great-grandparents for the younger ladies) were married with several children by the time they were 19-20. And so it has been since the dawn of time up until about 50 years ago.

Awhile back, I was thumbing through my mom’s senior-high yearbook from 1959. These high school seniors looked like 30 year old women. And they acted like it too in many ways. Our immediate foremothers displayed maturity and skillsets in terms of resourcefulness, frugality, wisdom, and homemaking abilities at age 18 that the modern 35 year old American woman would be hard pressed to display. A lot has changed in a short time.

I do not believe that God made a mistake when he designed our bodies to mature fully by the mid teens. This is when we were designed to meet the person we were to marry and begin life together and that has not changed despite our culture changing. The undisputed optimal age biologically for a woman to have a baby is around age 16. This age demonstrates the very best outcomes for mother and baby. Yet we now have women having their first child at age 35 and the age is getting pushed back further and further. And now the expected age of emotional maturity in American society is also being pushed back further and further with “kids” in their 30’s living in their parents’ basements and the inability to launch into adulthood altogether.

Also, the oh-so-common phenomena of the “teenage years” is unique to America and NEW – originating in the last 50 years- referring to the time of intense clashing between parent and child. It has originated because at this age the “child” is not meant to be a child anymore.

It is extremely unnatural to NOT begin having sex at 16 according to the design that God Himself created. We are the ones who have created the crisis of teen sex outside of marriage. We minimize the legitimacy of teenage love/ attachment and label sexuality as something that must be resisted, with no viable alternative of marriage at this now unacceptable age. Teenage love is tritely coined as “puppy love” and when these relationships inevitably end and the teen is utterly devastated we pat them on the head and explain that this heartbreak is a rite of passage. It is not. The love that occurs between two teens at 16 is real and powerful because it is meant to stick for life because God originally designed it that way.

It’s time for us to treat our young people as young adults and acknowledge that they are no longer children when we see them maturing physically and displaying independence. We must guide them to godly independence, encouraging and acknowledging rather than denying. We must raise our expectations of them to their capability, which is far higher than we give them credit for.

The American culture of late age (if any) marriage with impossibly long courtships is a sure recipe for fornication for even the godliest of people. It’s unnatural and nearly impossible. I will be encouraging my children to find godly mates young.

There is nothing wrong with having sex at age 16 if you are married. It is not the age that is the problem. It is that we have stigmatized young people to believe that they are incapable of commitment. Society sold the lie to “live it up” first and not get tied down young. Yet we can look to our grandparents lives – many married at 16 and married for 65 years, and their parents before them and so on. They lived and loved fully and richly, and worked hard, giving their lives beauty and meaning. Instinctively we (society) sense they had it better somehow- that they were more fulfilled despite having less materially and having to work harder- but the “why’s” are elusive to the majority, even to those in the church.

We need to return to God’s order.

Luckily, the “pendulum swings”.

Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein.
Jeremiah 6:16

Is Your Home Full of Strife or Peace?

Is Your Home Full of Strife or Peace?

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How does a woman tear down her own home? For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work (James 3:16). This woman is not content with what she has and does not live within her husband’s income but is constantly lusting for more when she sees what others have on Instagram, Facebook, and the fixer up shows on television. She has not learned godliness with contentment but is always searching for ways to spend more money than she has but this still is not enough for her.

She is full of strife. She quarrels and argues about many things because she is selfish and wants her own way. She is not fun to live with but makes everyone’s life miserable with her unhappiness, moodiness, and discontent. She is critical and finds fault with almost everything and everyone.

How does a wise woman build up her home? But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy (James 3:17). She is pure. She dwells upon the lovely and the good. She doesn’t watch filthy shows or movies. She is careful what she puts before her eyes and what she listens to since she loves the Lord and His ways.

She is peaceable. She isn’t argumentative and contentious. She doesn’t quarrel and fight for her own way. She is content in life and believes every day is a blessing and a gift to be enjoyed while she lovingly serves her family.

She is easy to be entreated. If someone needs help, they have no problem asking her since they know she will readily listen and help whenever, whoever, and wherever there is a need. She is servant-hearted and loves to make others lives as good and pleasant as she can.

She is full of mercy. She overlooks injuries and treats offenders better than they deserve. She understands that as Christ has forgiven her, she forgives them.

She is full of good fruits without partiality. She is patient and kind to all. She works hard in her home with willing hands and is consistently looking for things that need to be done. She will do good to any and all.

She is not a hypocrite. She lives what she believes. She doesn’t help others to be rewarded on this earth because the only one she aims to please is the Lord so she stores her treasures in heaven where they belong. Her actions, words, and behavior come from a deep and abiding faith in her Heavenly Father.

She builds her home up with all of these and her family rise up and call her blessed.

And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.
James 3:18

Rebellious Women Defraud Their Husbands

Rebellious Women Defraud Their Husbands

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The defrauding of one’s husband of sexual intimacy had severe consequences back in the day. A wife who deprived her husband was called rebellious, then sent away and was left destitute. As believers in Jesus Christ, we should never take any of God’s commands to us lightly or frivolously; for we are promised that we will reap what we sow.

All of the biblical translations use the word “deprive” in 1 Corinthians 7:5 except the KJV which uses the word “defraud.” Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

The definition of deprive is “to hinder from possessing or enjoying.” The definition of defraud is “to withhold wrongfully from another what is due to him.” Defraud is a much stronger word than deprive and defrauding our husbands of intimacy should be taken very seriously by all those who claim to love the Lord Jesus Christ.

Gill’s Exposition further explains defraud this way: “it is what both have a right to, and therefore, if either party is denied, it is a piece of injustice.”

A similar verse comes just two verses before this one. It is 1 Corinthians 7:3; Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.

Gill’s Exposition interpretation of this verse: “And, likewise also the wife unto the husband; she is not to refuse the use of the bed when required, unless there is some just impediment, otherwise she comes under the name of a ‘rebellious wife’; concerning whom, and her punishment, the Jews give the following rules: a woman that restrains her husband from the use of the bed, is called rebellious; and when they ask her why she rebels, if she says, because it is loathsome to me, and I cannot lie with him; then they oblige him to put her away directly, without her dowry; and she may not take any thing of her husband’s, not even her shoe strings, nor her hair lace; but what her husband did not give her she may take, and go away: and if she rebels against her husband, on purpose to afflict him, and she does to him so or so, and despises him, they send to her from the sanhedrim, and say to her, know thou, that if thou continuest in thy rebellion, thou shalt not prosper? and after that they publish her in the synagogues and schools four weeks, one after another, and say, such an one has rebelled against her husband; and after the publication, they send and say to her, if thou continuest in thy rebellion, thou wilt lose thy dowry; and they appoint her twelve months, and she has no sustenance from her husband all that time; and she goes out at the end of twelve months without her dowry, and returns everything that is her husband’s.”

The reasons noted in 1 Corinthians 7 for getting married in the first place were to “avoid fornication” (7:2) and for lack of self-control (7:5). The Word also tells us that it is better to marry than to burn. God created sex for marriage and when a husband is deprived and defrauded for any reason other than ill-health or injury, a wife is definitely being rebellious and living in sin which is a dangerous place to be in. Please, heed the scripture’s warning, women, and love your husbands as God commands that you love him.

Looking Good for Our Husband!

Looking Good for Our Husband!

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It’s a fact: men are more visual than woman. I read that one woman told her husband that she has never been attracted to another man and her husband responded, “Neither have I!” Women can see a man without a shirt on and admire his physique but as one woman shared in the chat room (who has a very honest husband) that when he sees a beautiful and immodestly dressed woman he mentally undresses her and pictures himself having sex with her. Yes, this was before he became a Christian so now he is much more diligent about not allowing his mind to do this but it’s the truth that many men struggle with.

Since we know this about men and if we are married to a man, we should do what we can to stay attractive for our own husband. The Federalist wrote an article called, Staying Fit for Your Husband is One of the Best Gifts You Can Give Him. I agree with this and I am sure a lot of husbands would as well. “The unspeakable truth is this: a spouse’s physical appearance is much more likely to be important to men than women. Maintaining their figures and beauty—through reasonable efforts—is one important way that women can make their husbands happy.”

I began following Danielle Walker (Against All Grain) on Instagram recently. She gained 65 pounds while she was pregnant and soon after her birth, she shared that she had already lost 30 pounds and wanted to lose the rest so she would feel good and look good for her husband. Her  plan was to not eat sugar and eat Paleo. Women went berserk over this and ridiculed her for saying this! “How dare you want to lose weight for a man!”

Instead of being ridiculed, she should have been applauded for wanting to make her husband happy! Women should not be ridiculed for wanting to look good for their husbands or for wanting to please them. Why do we think there are so many divorces today? Even Christian woman don’t make much of an effort to look good and serve their husbands because selfishness and “it’s all about me” is the motto of our day and age.

Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world (Titus 2:12).

We are not talking about being skinny or looking like a model. No, we are talking about eating healthy, exercising, eating only your portion (not overeating), and looking the best you can with what you have been blessed with. It’s called moderation and being temperate in all things which we, as believers, are called to do. Knowing that it’s important for your husband should give you even more incentive to stay in shape and look pretty for him (not in sweats and a t-shirt all day long).

 I can’t tell you how important accountability is in this battle against weight. Weighing yourself consistently is vital and even telling someone is good. Yes, it’s difficult but important to stay vigilant and it’s a lot easier to eat smaller portions and lose weight if you only have a few pounds to go rather than having many pounds to go. If you say you don’t have the discipline and self-control, you are lying to yourself. If you are a believe in Christ, one of the fruits of the spirit is self-control so Jesus inside of you has the self-control to eat less and lose some weight!

She that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.
1 Corinthians 7:34

Teaching Younger Women to Be Good

Teaching Younger Women to Be Good

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God instructs older women to teach younger women to be good in Titus 2:5. To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, GOOD, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Women have scolded me for saying we can be good. They say that only God is good because of this verse: And Jesus said unto him, Why call me good? there is none good but one, that is, God (Mark 10:18). But the reason Jesus said this according to Gill’s Exposition was that He was “not as denying that he was good, or as being angry with him for calling him so, but in order to lead this young man to a true knowledge of him, and his goodness, and even of his proper deity.” Of course, Jesus was good because He was perfect and now He lives inside of us! 

 God expects His children to be good just as we expect our children to be good. I love how all of the old commentaries used the KJV since it’s my favorite version of the Bible, so they all have the word “good” in them!

Ellicot’s Commentary on the word “good” in Titus 2:5: Gracious, kind, thoughtful to others, especially to inferiors.

Barnes’ Notes: In all respects, and in all relations. To a wife, a mother, a sister, there can be no higher characteristic ascribed, than to say that she is good. What other trait of mind will enable her better to perform her appropriate duties of life? What other will make her more like her Saviour?

Jamieson-Fausset: kind, beneficent. Not churlish and niggardly, but thrifty as housewives.

The book of Ephesians has a lot to say what God expects from us and what would be classified as being good, too.

These are all from Ephesians 4 and 5: Lowliness, meekness, longsuffering, forbearing one another in love, speaking the truth in love, be ye angry and sin not, working with our hands to give to those in need, no corrupt communication coming from our mouths but only which is good and edifying, kind, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, redeeming the time because the days are evil, filled with the Spirit, singing and making melody in your heart, and being thankful.

In these two chapters, we are told several times how we are to walk: walk worthy of the vocation (God’s calling for your life) wherewith ye are called (4:1), walk in love (5:2), walk as children of light (5:8), and walk circumspectly (5:15).

As godly women, our goal in life should be going around doing good and the most important people we should be doing good for is our own family. Learn to be a servant and do what you can to make their lives as happy as you can. Never forget that being a help meet to your husband is your priority. Fix your family good, nourishing food. Keep your home clean and tidy for them. Make sure their clothes are clean and put away. Be in the Word so you can be a cheerful presence in your home. Don’t be ruled by your emotions but be ruled by truth. Build your homes up by finding ways to bless your family and making your home a place of peace and rest.

How are we supposed to be good and accomplish all of these things? By putting on the whole armor of God and believing God’s promises to us; for it is His Spirit that works mightily within you!

With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men: Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he receive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free.
Ephesians 6:7, 8

No, I am Not Ultra-Conservative

No, I am Not Ultra-Conservative

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Some of you are ultra-conservative but I am not. I wear dresses and skirts just above my knees because this is where Ken likes me to wear them. I would wear them to the floor, if this is what he wanted from me. I even wear shorts once in a while around my home and some of my thigh shows. (One woman told me there is a verse about the thigh not showing so I asked her for it but she never responded.) I watch some TV (Hallmark, Fox News, The Duggars and The Bates Shows, and a few others) and go to the movie theater (but am careful about what I see – no nudity, sex scenes, vulgar language, etc.).

Recently, someone grabbed a picture that my daughter-in-law posted on her Instagram story of me with a skirt on with shorts underneath and some of my thigh showing. It was the Fourth of July and I was with my sons and their families and Ken. My legs were up on a footstool so more of my thigh shows than normal. (I have posted a picture of the jean skirt I was wearing that almost comes down to my knees when standing and I always wear shorts underneath it.)

If I knew my daughter-in-law was filming me and even if another man besides my sons or husband were around, I would have put my feet down on the ground but I didn’t know and had no clue that some woman would use it against me but this is what they do. They search and scour everything I write and every picture they can find about me (even from my children and their spouses) to try to destroy my ministry and make me into a hypocrite.

My family knows about it and they think it’s silly because they all know that I dress modestly. I never wear leggings unless I have a dress over it. I never wear low-cut tops, bikinis, short shorts, or a short skirt or dress. My modesty standards may not be the same as yours (some women were upset with a comment Ken made about some thigh showing) but that doesn’t mean we are wrong. I listen to godly men and what they consider immodest and dress accordingly. I don’t believe we need to wear burkas (as some women have told us) and cover our hair, faces, shoulders, and ankles. This isn’t what the typical man lusts after.

I have heard that some men have foot fetishes but this doesn’t mean we can never go barefoot. This is a problem with the men and yes, there are men who are perverts and will lust no matter what women wear but this isn’t our problem. It’s theirs. As godly women, we need to know how the typical man thinks and dress to not be a stumbling block to them.

No, I am not Amish and I’m not Mennonite or ultra-conservative, I am a believer in Jesus Christ and I love His ways. My greatest desire is to walk in obedience to Him. It’s the least that I can do for all He’s done for me. I am careful with what I see, what I wear, and what I do but my standards may not be the same as yours and this is okay. This is where our freedom in Christ comes; not to walk in sin, but to walk in obedience according to His Word, not legalism.

Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.
Galatians 5:1

Despising the Apostle Paul’s Teachings

Despising the Apostle Paul’s Teachings

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Many today have a great disdain for the Apostle Paul’s teachings. He commands us to not deprive our spouses of intimacy and it’s not based upon our feelings but living in obedience to the Lord. He commands women to submit to and obey their husbands and be keepers at home. He tells us that women are to be silent in the churches and not teach nor be in authority over men (1 Timothy 2:12). (No, women are not to be preachers and teachers of the Word. I found another verse that supports this: “And the things that thou hast heard of me among many witnesses, the same commit thou to faithful men, who shall be able to teach others also” – 2 Timothy 2:2. Do you notice the word “men”?) He explains that women are more easily deceived, thus many women today despise his teachings and say that he was just a woman-hater.

Paul also commands that women dress modestly. (Yes, I do believe women can cause men to lust. I realize many women don’t want to think that they are responsible for causing others to sin but we can and this is why we are commanded to not be a stumbling block for others.) He teaches us to be shamefaced and not draw attention to ourselves. He tells us to have meek and quiet spirits. God knew we needed to be taught this because it’s completely opposite of our normal tendencies. We like to rule the roost, draw men’s attention by the way we dress, and speak our minds, but we will never find true joy when we are living apart from the Lord’s ways.

Paul was inspired by the Holy Spirit so all of his teachings are straight from the mouth of God. Many fail to understand that we wouldn’t have the Church if Paul didn’t write what he wrote. There would be no elders or deacons who were called to be men of integrity and the husbands of one wife. If it weren’t for Galatians, we wouldn’t understand that we are no longer under the Law but under the law of grace and mercy. If it weren’t for Romans, we wouldn’t know that we are dead and freed from sin and now walk in newness of life. There’s also a good likelihood that he wrote the book of Hebrews in which we learn the superiority of Christ over the priests and the Judaic system and that we must continue to believe until the end. We wouldn’t have the joyful book of Philippians and knowing we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us and so on.

Yet, many women would love to do away with his teachings because of his instructions to women. Since the Holy Spirit spoke through him and God is the one who created male and female, Paul was given direct information about the differences between men and women and the perfect role for both of them. Being at home with our children, submitting to our husbands, and being silent in the churches are not oppressive. They are perfect for us! They make for order, decency, well-raised children, and strong marriages.

All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness.
2 Timothy 3:16

Empowerment By Doing as They Please?

Empowerment By Doing as They Please?

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In response to yesterday’s post about modesty, I received a comment that I want to write about since many women today have views about life that I don’t understand at all. Recently, there was a march in Cincinnati, Ohio where women took off their tops and walked around topless. In the big March on Washington DC, right after President Trump was inaugurated, the women wore vagina hats and bloody menstrual pads. All of this is beyond comprehension to me since I have never had any desire to do any of this. In fact, these things should cause shame and embarrassment in women.

Here is the comment in question: “Yes, that is exactly what some women believe (that they aren’t in any way responsible for men lusting at them no matter what they wear) because women don’t exist solely for men’s eyes. This is not strange. This is progress and empowerment. If you find empowerment in dressing modestly, please do so. I find empowerment in being able to choose to wear shorts when it’s hot outside (not that it’s anyone’s business but mine). I refuse to take responsibility for your or anyone’s husband or wife’s eyes.”

Therefore, all those women walking around topless and wearing vagina hats are doing this because they “feel” empowered and think this is progress. What is actually happening is that they are finding empowerment in their selfishness and pride. In the last days, the Bible states that people will be lovers of themselves and they will despise those who are good. They are doing the will of their father, the Devil, and are caught in his trap. They falsely believe they are “empowered” but they are actually in bondage to their sin and selfishness.

We, as godly women, don’t live our lives like this. We don’t care about being empowered by anything except for Christ and His strength. We don’t want to bring shame upon Him and blaspheme His name by doing things that are wicked and against what He requires of us. These women won’t find joy in what they are doing. They will keep wanting more and more and never be satisfied. True joy and satisfaction only comes from Christ.

Yes, we dress modestly to protect our brothers in Christ. Yes, we don’t deprive our husbands of intimacy so they won’t be tempted to wander elsewhere. Yes, we know that God has given us the responsibility to build up our homes instead of tearing them down with our own hands. Yes, we teach our children God’s Word so they will hide it deeply in their hearts and won’t sin against Him. We love obeying the Lord because His commands are not burdensome; they are freedom. Our influence and responsibility are important, women, so take it seriously and honor God with your lives in all areas.

This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
2 Timothy 3:1-5

Are Immodest Women Responsible for Causing Men to Lust?

Are Immodest Women Responsible for Causing Men to Lust?

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There’s something strange going on among women concerning the issue of modesty. They seem to want to believe that all men who lust are perverts and good men never lust. They also want to believe that a woman can dress however she wants (thong bikinis, leggings, etc.) and if a man lusts, it’s all the man’s sin. They don’t want to explain to their daughters that they should dress modestly so as not to cause men to lust after them. Instead, they only want to teach them modesty because they are valuable and should dress in a way that brings them honor.

First of all, all men who lust aren’t perverts. Every man has lusted at one time in his life or another. Jesus addressed the issue of lusting after women to men for a reason. They are attracted to the naked bodies of females. This is a God-given desire to help populate the earth and it’s good within the boundaries of marriage. Outside of marriage, it is sin if they lust or take it farther than this.

Secondly, women cannot dress however they want and expect men not to lust and if then the men do lust, they falsely believe that it’s the men’s fault alone. We are warned not to cause others to stumble and when a woman dresses so a lot of her flesh is showing and the clothes are tight-fitting, she will easily cause men to stumble so yes, she is partly responsible for their sin.

Women get all hysterical about this. They don’t want to take any blame and they act as if this is shaming them. It’s all about them and what they want and heaven forbid anyone explains to them the truth of men’s struggles. I don’t understand this because to me, I clearly know that men are attracted to immodestly dressed women and it can cause them to lust, therefore, I dress modestly. I don’t feel any shame about it and I certainly don’t want to be blamed for causing men to stumble so I cover up.

I have no idea why mothers have problems with explaining how the male mind works. I believe it is protection for their daughters and will make them wiser in how they dress, how they relate to men and eventually being a wife. It’s good for them to know male’s struggles just as it is good for males to know female’s struggles. Knowing that dressing modestly is not only in obedience to the Lord but to protect the men around them is important.

It continually amazes me how easily offended women are today. There’s no reason to be offended about any of this; it’s simply the facts of life and a command from God. He calls women to be shamefaced and not to draw attention to themselves for a reason. Godly, honest men have told me that the more flesh that is shown, the tighter the clothes fit, and the shorter they are, the harder it is for them not to lust. Don’t ever be a stumbling block by wearing any of these in front of men who are not your husband; for if you love the Lord and His ways, you will obey what He asks of you.

Let us not therefore judge one another any more: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumblingblock or an occasion to fall in his brother’s way.
Romans 14:13

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