A Brawling (Quarreling), Scolding Woman
From Matthew Henry Commentary
See here, What a great affliction it is to a man to have a brawling scolding woman for his wife, who upon every occasion, and often upon no occasion, breaks out into a passion, and chides either him or those about her, is fretful to herself and furious to her children, and, in both, vexatious to her husband. If a man has a wide house, spacious and pompous, this will embitter the comfort of it to him–a house of society (so the word is), in which a man may be sociable, and entertain his friends; this will make both him and his house unsociable, and unfit for enjoyments of true friendship. It makes a man ashamed of his choice and his management, and disturbs his company.
What many a man is forced to do under such an affliction. He cannot keep up his authority. He finds it to no purpose to contradict the most unreasonable passion, for it is unruly and rages so much the more; and his wisdom and grace will not suffer him to render railing for railing, nor his conjugal affection to use any severity, and therefore he finds it his best way to retire into a corner of the house-top,and sit alone there, out of the hearing of her clamour; and if he employ himself well there, as he may do, it is the wisest course he can take. Better do so than quit the house, and go into bad company, for diversion, as many, who, like Adam, make their wife’s sin the excuse of their own.
It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop,
than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
Proverbs 21:8
3 thoughts on “A Brawling (Quarreling), Scolding Woman”
Strong words from 400 years ago. Yes, feminism was quite noticeable even then.
Certainly the corner of the roof top is better than a man abandoning post, leaving home – including the unsavory that may be aligned with, especially adultery.
But to ‘love her as Christ loved the church’ is to confront [the church won’t tell you this for it does not want to be confronted itself, of its idols] – for Christ is the “Rock of Offense.” And there comes a time to offend her of her idol and separate wheat from chaff in the marriage. Jesus was Truth and Light and the Way. He did not run; He kept speaking the Word at the cost of His life. This is the cross of most men to some material degree.
Men, “Take up your cross and follow Me” and His righteousness, in some form, will eventually prevail in your marriage, and keep the disease from spreading. Women consider the cross you are building for your man. This will all then model it for the church at large and help put a stick in the spokes of the vicious circle of marriage and the church feeding negatively off each other, going on for at least 400 years.
However, when that wife is calling you her enemy, threatening you with all kinds of threats to cause you to submit to her authority and seeking ways to destroy your character (i found her journal) it puts a different dynamic on the relationship. Abuse is never acceptable no matter who it comes from. Sometimes you must pull back from your post and assess the situation and accept the possibility of separating. Verbal, emotional, psychological and physical abuse should not be allowed nor tolerated by man or woman.
Very interesting comment, as I am reading Proverbs 25:24. I would also characterize this behavior as a scorner and when the scorner stops then strife and contention also cease. It appears that pulling back is an option but it may be perceived as weakness. Prayer helps but what’s more important is don’t let a woman sin become your excuse of sinning.