The Biblical Reason for Marriage
“My mom lived her life the way you teach. She married young and had a bunch of children. She submitted to my dad but he divorced her so she was left alone with all of these children and no way to make a living. Your way doesn’t work and is destructive for women.”
This is a story I have heard over and over again but with a few different details. Because of this story according to them, women need to flee biblical womanhood and live their lives as feminists instead who can take care of themselves! Well, how about this story that I hear over and over again with slightly different details?
“My mom was a raging feminist. She had a high profile career so she put me into daycare when I was a baby and I rarely saw her. She was too tired to do much with me when she came home at night or give anything to my dad. She eventually divorced my dad because she wasn’t happy. I want to do better for my family!”
I can tell you one thing, before the 1960s, most families were like the first story (full-time mothers at home, dads the provider, and more than a few children) and there weren’t nearly the amount of divorces or children being raised by single mothers as there are today. Not even close.
We must not base our experiences or other’s experiences upon whether or not to obey the Word of God. God doesn’t promise us perfect lives if we follow His will. No, He promises that we will experience tribulation but we are to take heart; for He has overcome the world. Therefore, we live out biblical womanhood and leave the results with Him.
From what I have seen, the godly women who are marrying, bearing children, and guiding the home as unto the Lord are much more content and joyful about their lives than those “biblical feminists” who make sure they have a career, put off marriage, then maybe have a child or two if they feel like it.
Marriage isn’t about making us happy and doing our own thing, as feminists would have us believe today. “The biblical reason for marriage is to produce fruit for God. Marriage is to produce children and to make the earth fruitful for God. Christian marriage, in other words, is God-centered (producing what God wants) rather than me- or us-centered (meeting my or our desires)” (John Piper).
God’s will for young women is to marry, bear children, and guide the home. It’s that simple. We aren’t promise that there won’t be suffering, heartache, and pain along the way but we can rest assured that God, who owns everything, will never leave nor forsake us.
And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed.
Malachi 2:15
6 thoughts on “The Biblical Reason for Marriage”
The original commentor made me laugh. Despite their mum having no way to make a living’, they somehow survived.
People don’t divorce for the sake of it, (or do they???) there may of been a need their father had their mother didn’t fulfill. And it wasn’t something they were aware of as kids. But I guess they are too bitter to work it out or ask. ☹️
I was really excited to find this blog, as it appeared to be a great encouragement for wives to live the way the Bible tells us to…in submission to our husbands, with meek, gentle spirits, and so on. But I kept encountering wording that set me on edge a little bit, making me think something might be off. Then you quoted John Piper. There we go, that’s the problem.
You’re definitely on the right track, and many of your teachings are sound. I hope you’ll continue learning and teaching, and that you’ll eventually find the whole truth. If you want to find out what I’m taking issue with here, I am happy to have a private conversation, but I will not get into a public debate. Thank you for speaking out for Biblical womanhood!
My one son shared with us a female coworker’s remark about having her daughter in day care. She (the care giver)was reporting to the mom what new thing the baby had done that day. The mom shared this at work. My son said to us that he felt so sad for his co worker because she was experiencing her baby’s ‘firsts’ second hand. He was also amazed at how this type of thing was so accepted, like there wasn’t any remorse over it. (Yes, we are both working and of course, my child will be in daycare or at grandma’s.) He wants his wife to be able to have the privilege of experiencing all their children’s ‘firsts’, when he finally finds his virtuous woman :).
I don’t like John Piper either. Listened to a couple of his sermons and felt they lacked substance. ?
I know this posts is a little old, and I dont know if you still check the comments from this far back, but I have been emotionally distressed recently by this new socially acceptable disdain for marriage. Ever since premarital sex became common, and divorces skyrocketed, people (the world) feel that marriage was really the problem to begin with. I read several comments on different sites talking about how marriage is outdated and puts unnecessary strain on the relationship. I do not believe this for one second, simply because God blessed marriage and anything God blessed Satan will try and curse, but I have a hard time putting into words why marriage is the best way to express love and start a family. I would greatly appreciate some wisdom on this topic as many people talk about things similar to my question, but Ive never seen someone specifically ask the question I have and be given an answer. Thanks in advance!
Marriage is commitment. This is God’s plan. It’s to last until death do you part. It’s a secure environment for children to grow up in with the same last name as their parents. Living together isn’t commitment. When the couple breaks up, it’s as painful to the children as if their parents were divorced. All of God’s ways are best!