Children Being Abandoned By Their Mothers
Recently I shared this tweet: “I was raised by nannies and daycares. It sucked. Have this memory of being like three and sitting inside my mom’s closet wrapped in her robe, smelling her smell, missing her so completely because she was gone on a work trip for weeks. Some sad sh+t. Don’t do that to your kids.”
The response and comments were overwhelming! I am going to share a few of them since God commands women to be “keepers at home” for many reasons so they don’t blaspheme His Word, and I believe this to be the main reason. Children need and want their mothers home full time. No one can take the place of a mother in a child’s life.
“I hardly remember what I did to cope with the loneliness. My mother was single since the coward of my father left her for another woman. I grew up in dire need of my mother. She worked all the time. I endured things as a child I should have never endured but I don’t blame her. I blame the coward that left her with all the responsibilities. My mother did the best she could. I chose to stay home and take care of my babies and to this day, I am a homemaker and homeschooler mom. I thank God for a husband that provides and that knows the importance of me staying home.”
“I wore mum’s robe to bed. For a brief time, I would eat with the fork she ate with (embarrassed by this one) but a couple of nights, I slept with her empty coke can next to my bed for comfort. She’s a wonderful mum. I just really needed her when I was a kid.”
“This was me as a kid. I desperately wanted my mom and it created this lifelong feeling of not being good enough. Each time I feel a tiny bit of rejection from people I love, it confirms what I’ve always felt growing up. Thankful my Creator took me in.”
“My mom worked full time when I was little and I have hardly any memories of her from that time. I can remember my babysitters and long days at the sitter, but nothing about my mom.”
“I remember multiple babysitters as our single mom worked. We were shut in closets or our room while they misbehaved.”
“My mom went back to work when I was eight and knowing how much it affected me and hearing my mom now in her 60s say that the biggest regret was leaving her kids to go back to work is the reason why I knew I wanted to stay home with my baby.” (My biggest regret was leaving my oldest for the first two years of her life since everyone told me this was what I was supposed to do. I knew it was so wrong.)
“My parents used to travel a lot and left us kids home with grandparents, and I was too young to understand it was just a trip. I thought they abandoned us, and I grew up having abandonment issues.”
“This is a common story. My mom had to work when I was a child and I spent a of time with grandparents. I grew up and became a teacher and saw so many children struggle with not having a mom at home. When I got married, we vowed not to let that happen to our children. I’ve since stayed home and now we homeschool. There is a sense of security that a mom being home brings to children.”
“This is true. My daughter said she used to fake sick at school just so she could see me. She missed me so much when I worked as I did night shift. This broke my heart. It truly did. I’m at home full time with my kids again. God’s word is Truth. I’m going to read this book (“The Way Home” by Mary Pride).
“I was the same. I had terrible separation anxiety and would fake being sick all the time so she would come home from work.”
“A core memory of mine: I remember waking up in the middle of the night. I knew my mom was gone at work so I went outside and sat on the porch. I guess I was waiting for her. I look at my children now and it breaks my heart thinking of them having to look for me.”
“I had to go to daycare one summer after my parents divorced. I hated it and can still remember bits and pieces of that summer. Later, a neighbor lady watched us. She had two kids who were younger and sweet to my little sister and me. Then we had a horrible teenage baby sitter who locked us outside many times and ignored us. Thankfully, my mom got remarried and was able to be home after school again by the time I was in middle school.”
“I remember screaming, crying, and begging my mom not to go to work. She had to as the breadwinner, but the damage was done. Anger, resentment, addiction, disassociation; all a result of trauma.”
“I was in daycare then aftercare most of my childhood. Didn’t see my mom till it was dark outside and about to go to sleep. Not the way it should be.”
“Being raised by a working mom is what made me want to stay home with mine.”
“I was blessed that my mom was a homemaker. I did, however, work in the daycare scene myself as an adult. Seriously, it’s AWFUL!”
“I remember getting dropped off at daycare at such a young age. It literally felt like I was being abandoned and I see it everyday now working at a daycare, especially with babies that are just starting. They have no concept or understanding of ‘mommy is coming back later.’ All they understand at the moment is that mom is leaving them behind. I’m thankful to understand how devastating that is for a child because I refuse to put my future children through this!”
“I remember crying into my nanny’s sofa as I waited for my mom to pick my up at 7 pm. I used to eat dinner at my nanny’s house. I often wondered why my parents had me because they were never around. There’s a big difference between having a baby and being a parent.”
“My mom was a single mom so we had a series of nannies, babysitters, and family members who essentially raised us. Some were quite mean and brutal. Mom hired whoever she could afford and whoever would take us. The one thing we wanted was to be with mom, but that’s the last thing we had.”
“I worked part-time in a daycare after school when I was a senior. I loved little kids and thought it would be fun to work with them, but it was so heartbreaking. Most of the kids were there for over ten hours. I overheard some parents telling their kids, “I can’t wait to put you into bed” as they were picking them up. We usually let them watch a show after the afternoon nap and they were always fighting over who could sit on my lap. It was heartbreaking to know they just wanted a warm hug and snuggles, but there was only one of me and twelve kids. I could truly go on all day. Kids need their mom!”
“All the complaining women that think they’re excused from being obedient to the Word of God is just another example of the great falling away. Those that disagree with The Word because they want MORE, more of this world. As a homeschooling mother of eight Blessings, we did WITHOUT so much to raise up our children in the way they should go, giving them incredible childhoods based on loving parents and based on the fact that they CAME FIRST after The Lord. The Husband/Wife relationship was next and they were next. This cost us sacrifice, yes, it was sacrificial, but it was also incredibly BLESSED to be able to spend all our years of raising children, not handing them off as if training them up isn’t OUR RESPONSIBILITY to THE LORD. We’re called to help our children so that they won’t forsake their mother’s teaching, so that when their fathers and mothers are seen as Godly Dedicated Parents, the Word of God would not be maligned! Disagree? Take it up with GOD.”
Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.
Isaiah 49:15