Do Young Women Need an Outlet?

Do Young Women Need an Outlet?

A young woman wrote me recently and asked me about doing things from home to make money. She asked me, “Doesn’t every young woman need an outlet?” She wants to be a better housekeeper, cook, and train her children more but these “outlets” have made her life more than she can handle since she is giving too much time to her “outlets.”

God instructs young women to be keepers at home and they should be known for “looking well to the ways of their household and not eating the bread of idleness.” They are to love their husband and children. They are the ones that will do most of the training and disciplining of the children. They need to work hard to have clean and tidy homes along with fixing nourishing food for their families. Unfortunately, something awful has infiltrated young women’s minds today – discontentment for God’s calling on their lives.

They no longer “feel” content just being a wife, mother, and homemaker because our culture tells them that this isn’t enough. No, they need to be able to make some money to have worth and even make a name for themselves. This is such a huge temptation with the Internet these days. Young women are becoming popular because of Facebook and Instagram and use their valuable time on these things that won’t last.

As godly young women, you need to be spending your days on what God has called you to spend it on – being keepers at home and working hard at home. You need to be investing your lives into those things that are eternal – your husband and children. All those “outlets” you may be pursuing that are taking time away from your husband, children, and home aren’t eternal. Money is NOT your worth! What you invest in eternity is your worth to God, namely storing your treasures in heaven.

You don’t need to listen to what the others are telling you. You don’t need to be well-known or popular among people you don’t even know. Spend your time investing in those things that matter to the Lord instead. This will profit your husband and your children way more than any of those “outlets” you are involved in that are stealing your time away from them.

If young women “need” an outlet, how about one that will benefit the family in practical ways like learning to clean your house better, declutter and organize with your children by your side, raise chickens and eat your own eggs, garden, and can your food, learn to sew and make things for your home, learn to cook healthy foods and make them great tasting, and so on. The outlets are endless that you can find in your home that won’t take away valuable time from being with your family!

She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Proverbs 31:27

24 thoughts on “Do Young Women Need an Outlet?

  1. I think young women can have hobbies within reason and that do not shirk her duties to her home and family. My mother and grandmother loved gardening for instance. Maybe having a wive’s or ladies club to exchange ideas for good housekeeping and fellowship are good. I myself love feminine fashions of all sorts and love shopping for skirts and dresses! If not in your budget, you can learn to make your own beautiful clothes for cheaper! My aunt used to and she is an excellent seamstress! Baking is a wonderful hobby to please your family and friends! Knitting crocheting, embroidery, painting, etc… are great art projects! redecorating the home…. One can even reach out online like you do, Lori, and inspire other women to be ladies of elegance and grace and combat radical feminism. After all, it is the strident loudmouths out there speaking the most. Ladies need to get their voices heard too to tell women not all women embrace feminist lies!

  2. I 100% agree. Every year as my kids get older I add something new to help the family and keep my mind active. On our few acres I have expanded the gardens, raised chickens, and built an outdoor kitchen, I plan to add beekeeping, house remodeling, and many more things in the future. Along with homeschooling, cooking most things from scratch, and helping in my community and church I stay plenty busy and never feel like I need to do more. I treasure my days and find so much joy in working within my home.

  3. Thank you Lori for another great post. I love being at home with my family. My daughters are no longer children and oh how I miss those little people. If these women really need an outlet they can take a meal to the widow who just lost her husband. Or help out at a food bank and bring the children along. Many charities will allow children to help with such things.

    Canning is fun and there is almost always someone who needs excess fruit picked off their trees! Mom and children can make jam together. Pressure canning can be intimidating but it’s easy once you get the hang of it.

    There are so many things wives and mothers can do without sacrificing their families.

    1. Yes, all of my children are grown, too, but it sure is fun to be “mother” again to my grandchildren, Regina! I had three of them over last night and taught them the song “The B-I-B-L-E, yes that’s the book for me. I stand alone on the word of God. The B-I-B-L-E!” We had so much fun together learning it.

  4. As my outlet, I homeschool, read and run cross-country with my kids! Life doesn’t have to be complicated. Usually “self- care” can mean running to extra places outside of the home and wasting money on unnecessary material items that don’t really bring peace and joy.

  5. Being at home sustains and fulfills me. I agree that many women think they are useless unless they bring in monetary help, which they suppose will bring them greater worth and value. This is such a deception from the enemy of our souls. May the Lord help Christian women realize the true value in being home. The values that are spiritual and not materialistic. Thanks for your faithfulness in encouraging younger women, Lori.

    1. You’re welcome, Holly, and you’re so right! Our husbands are our providers so we don’t need to be and we are the ones ordained to be at home raising the children. God’s will is good and perfect!

  6. Keep it up, Lori, and thank you for this post! I have heard over and over from younger and older women that they need “me” time. Sometimes, it’s even given as an imperative: “Moms need ‘me’ time!” Or “make sure you have an outlet!”

    Honestly, I don’t even want to go away on Ladies Weekends or Girls Nights Out. I feel like it is time away from my family. There’s nothing I’d rather do than spend time with my husband and children or keep my home clean and welcoming and filled with good things to eat. With any leisure time, I do like to visit the elderly who are shut-in or help another struggling family out.

  7. never felt the need for all these outlet things. love keeping house, kids and hubs happy etc. love my peaceful slow life w/o all the stress and problems. sometimes my peace is broken by these ideas pushed by other women more than men. but then I get focused again and love my life even more. such a shame that even the church pushes these ideas w/all these studies,retreats and the like. I received more pressure from women at church than anywhere else. so sad.

  8. I absolutely agree with this post 100%, but I do have a question. What if you find yourself in a situation where your husband is struggling to cover the electric, gas for the car, etc. and you have a skill that can make money from home? I am able to make some money, but I really struggle fitting in time for this with homeschooling, taking care of the house, spending time with hubby, etc. I feel like a complete failure at times because I see blogs where women have 8 kids and are managing a writing career successfully and I can’t seem to do with only 3! My husband says to worry about taking care of the kids and house and let him handle the money because he doesn’t like the house to be neglected. I am sooo happy and peaceful when I’m only worrying about my responsibilities at home, but when things get really tight I feel horribly guilty and I start to brainstorm about how to squeeze in extra writing time. I’m driving myself crazy and I’m not sure what to do.

    1. Obey your husband and take care of the kids and house as he says for you to do! Let him take care of providing for the family and trust God to give him wisdom in doing so. Pray for him daily. God will provide!

  9. Lori, I agree that outlets (and outside jobs) can get in the way of my responsibilities as a homemaker and rob me of joy as I race from one thing to another. For many years I worked outside the home as my husband preferred me to earn an income. I only took part-time jobs, but quickly found that even part-time hours put a real dent in my ability to become the wife, mother, and homemaker I wanted to be. An injury led to the end of my working life, and I am now home full-time. I meet with friends weekly and volunteer a few hours per week, but I am careful to schedule those “outlets” in a way that doesn’t interfere with my home and family responsibilities. I am more patient and more pleasant to live with since this change and I see the benefits in our family life as well. The funny thing is that soon after I had to leave my last job, my husband was given a raise in pay that was around the same amount that I was earning at work.

    1. I have heard of God providing in these situations so many times, Kande He is able to accomplish more than we could even imagine! Young mothers are encouraged to become involved in so many activities that they are hardly ever home and failing to do what God has called them to do. You are a wise woman!

  10. I never had kids so it’s hard for me to comment on that part. But, even without, this house & my husband keep me busy. I do love to create things for my home & yard so I suppose that is an outlet incorporated into the homemaking plan. My husband loves my silly yard art and the inside décor to the point of requesting certain things. In the evenings, I enjoy handiwork like embroidery, rug weaving, etc. This creative outlet helps us with gifting and charity. Some is donated for local auctions & some blankets to a local children’s home.

  11. I have also found a way to exercise creativity in my home life without spending money we don’t have now that I am home again. I make homemade seasonal decorations patterned after items I see on “idea shopping trips” and in others’ homes. I decorated my home for fall with acorns, pine cones, and nuts that I found while taking my daily walk and fruit that I bought for consumption. I re-purpose other people’s discarded furniture, knicknacks, and pictures to create the warm home environment I crave. I have a small budget for buying useful items and I usually spend it at thrift stores for high quality items that need a little TLC to be beautiful again (old lamps, tarnished brass or silver. nice linens with a torn seam or small stains that can easily be repaired or bleached). I love to paint, sew, and find ways to beautify our home. I love keeping it as beautiful, clean, and comfortable for my family. Part of that is simply letting them feel relaxed in our home, so I don’t fuss about picking up discarded papers , coats on the bannister, or the occasional pair of shoes. I love being at home and serving my family much more than I ever did serving a boss and customers.

  12. My mother’s “outlet” was running. Well, she had 5 kids to look after during the day, a husband to care for in the evenings, and a family to feed three times a day! Her solution was to get up earlier than all of us and run 5 miles every morning at 6am. Her example taught me that if there is something that is so important to you, you will make time for it without sacrificing your obligations to your family. Not to mention, my father understood that running was her passion and knew this before marriage, so it wasn’t some new scheme she dreamt up. He supported her dedication to it and I think found it an attractive quality 🙂

    1. That’s a great outlet, Katie! She gets outside in the fresh air and gets to exercise. I used to do that when I was much younger and my body could handle the stress of running but now I go on long walks with my husband every day.

  13. hello I just wanted to tell you that this post of yours was an answer to a prayer of mine! I’ve had a “bookstagram” on and off the past year. I usually end up deactivating it because it takes up a good amount of my time and I have three small children.

    the other day I prayed to God to show me whether I should have a bookstagram or not, as I love to read and really love the artistic outlet of IG. I’ve been reading your blog for years & you normally talk about women staying busy at home with import things, but this one post seems to specifically answer my question!! thank you!!! keep up your blog writing it is important and appreciated.

    1. You’re welcome, Ran, and thank you! Yes, your God-ordained ministry is to your husband, children, and home. These are to be your priority and if all your time is used by taking care of them, then that is enough.

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