Basing Beliefs Upon Experiences Instead of Truth

Basing Beliefs Upon Experiences Instead of Truth

One reason given for women not teaching or having authority over men in the churches was that Eve was deceived (1 Timothy 2:14). I have been mentoring women for over 15 years. I have been writing for a blog for almost eight years. A troubling trend that I see among many women is that they tend to base their beliefs upon their experiences, emotions, and feelings instead of what is true. For instance, these are a few themes that women have commented to me on my blog or Facebook page.

“My husband physically abused me, therefore, women should not submit to their husbands and winning a husband without a word by godly behavior doesn’t work because it didn’t work for me.”

“My children turned out great and I worked outside of the home full time.”

“I was sexually assaulted in my past, therefore, all women who say they have been assaulted should be believed.”

“So-and-so (a famous woman preacher) brings many to the Lord so women should be able to preach.”

“This popular female blogger makes me feel so good about myself so she must be okay to learn from.”

All of these things I have heard over and over again to dispute what I write and what is truth. Many peoople wholeheartedly believe these statements to be true, regardless of whether they are or not.

If a husband physically abuses his wife, he is either a very troubled man or an evil man. Not one woman that I have mentored who has been physically abused by her husband has told me that their husband is evil. They all say their husband is very troubled and needs help. I encourage them to call the authorities if they are being physically abused and even separate for a time until he gets help. BUT this doesn’t make void God’s commands for wives to submit to their husband’s leadership and that women who are married to disobedient husbands are to win their husbands without the word by their godly behavior (1 Peter 3:1). God’s ways are “good, and acceptable, and perfect” (Romans 12:2) so we must trust and obey Him! There are TWELVE verses that clearly states a wife’s position under her husband. There’s no guessing game here.

Yes, some women can work outside of the home and their children turn out great but this doesn’t negate God’s command for younger women to be keepers at home. It doesn’t negate the studies that prove that children are more emotionally stable and secure who are raised full time by their mothers. It only takes common sense to understand that children need and want their mothers! Yes, it’s a sacrifice that mothers make to stay home but it is well worth the time, energy, and sacrifice, since there is NO greater joy than to have your children walk in truth (3 John 1:4). Satan’s goal is to kill, steal, and destroy. He loves to steal children away from the Lord. This is why mothers need to be home with their children full time to not only raise them up in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord but to protect them from the schemes of the evil one and from the wicked culture that we live in. “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully” (1 Timothy 5:14).

Some women have and will always be sexually assaulted by men. Some have even been sexually molested by their own fathers and it’s tragic. BUT this doesn’t mean that every single woman that claims sexual assault is being truthful. The facts must be studied and proven whether they are true or not. Yes, some women lie for their own gain. Yes, all women aren’t truthful. In order to believe that women never lie, one must believe that women are sinless which they are not. “Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment” (John 7:24).

Just because there are women preachers who seem to be very successful doesn’t make what they are doing right. In fact, it’s not right. It’s against God’s clear command that women are not to teach nor be in authority over men. They are to be silent in the churches and if they have a question, they are to ask their husbands at home. No, there were NO women preachers in the Bible since it’s against God’s will for them. Live your lives by truth instead of what you may think is right. “But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence” (1 Timothy 2:12).

There are many false teachers out there. Many of the “Christian” young female bloggers twist the word of God to make women “feel” good about themselves. The only truth that should make women feel good about themselves is understanding who they are in Christ, what He has done for them, all of their sins have been forgiven if they believe, and they will live eternally with Him. Our lives are to be lived as living sacrifices (Romans 12:1). There’s nothing in the word about “me time” and spending time on our pleasures. No, it’s about living a life that glorifies the Lord in all that we do. We are to also call out sin when it’s clearly against the word of God, not try to make others comfortable in their sin since sin is destructive, and living in obedience to God is what we are called to do. “Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world”(1 John 4:1).

Don’t live your life by your experiences, what’s popular, what makes you feel good, or your emotions, dear women. Be in the word of God daily and renew your minds with truth. Ask the Lord for wisdom and He will freely give it to you. No longer be conformed to this world but be transformed by truth!

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
Romans 12:2

17 thoughts on “Basing Beliefs Upon Experiences Instead of Truth

  1. Indeed! Just because you say your kids “turned out fine” after you broke up the family unit through divorce, they most likely were deeply scarred, but forced to repress it by being blamed by therapists and everyone else to think THEY were wrong for wanting a real family, not a broken one! Their pain just escaped your shallow self centered radar!

    You think all men are jerks and potential rapists, because one looked at you, or complemented your blouse and you took it in a dirtier direction in your mind, when really, he literally only meant what was properly said.

    You think your children are inconvenient burdens for just wanting your affection, love and care! And that motherhood is enslaving and belittling instead of your greatest calling…

    You think a woman should be identical to a man in every way to be equal, but that’s a radical feminist lie!

    You think the Left knows what’s best, but in reality, you’ve been brainwashed to feed into lies about promiscuity and hook up culture! Sex is a handshake, not a milestone in your deluded radical feminist world!

    So many women are those whom I’ve addressed! what a sad state society is in due to women being easily deceived!

  2. A huge thank you for your doctrinally correct teaching to younger women. When women apply correct doctrine, it is demonstrated by chaste, holy behavior.

  3. I think it is a human failing that we all find it easier to look to our experiences rather than the truth on many issues. But what you say is absolutely right.

    That your grandfather who smoked 40 a day did not die of cancer does not change it that cigarettes are bad for your health.

    That your children prosper despite of their mother prioritising her career does not negate the fact that she should have been at home.

    That some husbands are abusive and all are flawed does not change the fact that we should submit to our husbands in marriage.

  4. Lori,

    I wish so much that my wife read your blog, but she doesn’t like the Pearl’s teachings.

    Ken,

    Here is an example:

    Hallmark Holiday special. All of the Hallmark movies follow a similar plot.

    She is an elf that is sent to bring the spirit of xmas back to a family that is self centered.

    The elf is told she must not become emotionally involved with anyone. Just get the job done. But she falls in love with a man. In the end, she “follows her heart” and chooses to become a mortal so she be with him.

    That’s a similar story in Hollywood romantic comedies, going back to I Married a Witch and Bell, Book, and Candle etc, etc. A beautiful supernatural female who falls in love with a man, and follows her heart, at the price of becoming human.

    See the themes? All following your heart and emotions. The heart of man is wicked, and following your emotions can lead to disaster, but it is encouraged in ALL Hallmark movies.

    What I found noteworthy about Help for the Holidays is that this female elf broke the rules of her job to follow her heart, and it was okay. Santa overlooked her failure. Following her heart was more important than any rule. Santa said that every elf was free to Choose, and that whatever Choice she made was perfectly fine. (Kinda like how any Choice a woman makes is perfectly fine.)

    It is aimed at females and is emotional porn ie. Female pornography

    1. I am not saying that Hallmark does not play to a woman’s emotions as almost every book and movie is making some emotion appeal or no one would watch it. The bottom line of Hallmark movies is that guy + girl + love + marriage is a good thing.

      I just kind of watched another Hallmark movie last night that Lori taped. I will confess that I am busy on my computer so I don’t usually get the full gist of the movies, but concerning this elf magic you wrote about, I rarely have seen that kind of stuff except around Christmas time. The Hallmark channel is clean and decent and yes, “follow your heart” is usually the theme of the movie, but if that means the heart takes her to what is good, acceptable, and marriage, then why bash it?

      I think creating the label female porn because Hallmark appeals to a female’s emotional desires for a good man, family and friends, good relationships; this is all good and lovely stuff. Especially if it is turning career women into marriage material which it often does.

      Can I assume that you watch no movies at all? There are very few that do no appeal to some base fleshly desire of man or woman. It’s always enjoyable for me to see a movie that represents good values as being right instead of the debased culture. I am not saying some women may get desirous of something artificial from the Hallmark movie, but I am pretty sure most Christian women see the movie for what it is, a feel good make believe movie that hopefully helps her try to live decently towards her spouse.

  5. Very true. Appeal to anecdote is a logical fallacy, yet most Americans decide what is true or not based on their personal experience. And our country is badly misguided as a result.

    Our own experiences are far from objective truth, and most are too lazy to do the work necessary to determine what is objective truth. As a result, they furiously defend their subjective truth, and viciously attack the objective truths. They believe that who is right is more important than what is right. Pride is far more common than humility. A humble person knows they don’t know, and does a lot of work to understand and to learn. A proud person thinks their college degree and experience is all they need to know the truth, and they don’t need to listen to anyone else unless that person treats them nice. The people who do treat the proud people nice are the ruthless scoundrels who lead the naïve and gullible astray.

  6. I shared one of Lori’s post and a younger lady challenged it, saying that her mom worked outside the home & had good children. When I responded with Titus 2:4-5, a pastor responded to my comment by saying the proverb 31 woman bought a field from her earnings. I didn’t know what to say?
    Should I resume work part time, so I could invest or buy property as the proverb 31 woman?

    1. From Proverbs 31: “16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.” I don’t see anywhere that it says she bought a field with her own earnings. She probably bought it with what her husband earned. She wasn’t a real estate agent as many proclaim today. No, she bought one field and planted on it. She was known for “looking well to the ways of her household” not having a career, leaving her home for hours every day and her children in the hands of strangers to work for a boss. No, everything she did was from her home and caring for her family as she was called to do. Yes, she sewed some things and sold them but she didn’t go to a factory every day to sew them. She sewed them in her home, most likely with her daughters by her side.

  7. Thank you for your commitment to God & to mentoring women, Lori! The world says one thing, but God clearly says another. I hear the crazy things you shared above & know the deceptive author of it. Satan comes to kill, steal, & destroy, so he plants this nonsense.

    Hence the importance of prayer & staying in the word. My kids are (almost) 18 & 20. I have college degrees & have worked part-time for many years while my children grew up. How I wish I would’ve taken this to heart when they were young & stayed home, but I can’t change anything now. But, it’s never too late to follow His word & remain a powerful praying wife & mother. They are truly the most important, noble, & blessed jobs that have been bestowed upon us.

    1. You’re welcome, SLP! Yes, wisdom only comes from the Lord and many are choosing to not have anything to do with Him or are trying to twist His words to say something that they don’t mean. We must believe the truth as clearly written!

  8. Excellent post!

    Feelings lie and this is why God’s Word must be at the basis of what we believe. Too many in our country and church are chasing feelings and trying to make them into truth. “I feel it therefore it must be true.” Any mature person knows that their mind and feelings have lied to them at times. They are “so sure” about something only to be proven wrong by the facts, especially the facts of God’s Word. They want egalitarianism and women in leadership so badly that their “feelings” propel them to make twisted reasons to try and make God’s Word say the exact opposite of what the Bible tells us.

    “Wives submit to your husbands.” Oh this means mutual submission! “So do you submit to your husband?” “Of course not, unless he is submitting to me!”

    “I do not permit a woman to teach or exercise authority over a man.” “There were many women leaders and preachers in the Bible. The first sermon ever spoken was by the three women who found the tomb empty!” OK… so women are to teach in the church even when God plainly says they are not to teach in the church? This opposite reasoning also apply to “husbands love your wives?”

    Should a husband reason that if she is not doing her part ion the marriage then he is to withhold love, kindness and consideration from his wife? After all, submissive Jesus did turn the tables in the temple on those sinners! Forget the cross and the suffering servant, I want to just focus on the few passages of the indignant Jesus because that fits my feelings right now. Pooey!

    It is like it is opposite day talking to some of these people. They are darn sure that they know God would not ask something of a woman that they “feel” is not right. Especially not right for this culture, yet God’s Word says the opposite and almost all of church history proves them wrong. They have completely twisted the Word to somehow say the opposite of what it actually says to assuage their feelings and try and fit right in with 21st century feminism. All this in spite of Jesus saying we are to be different and not a part of the world’s systems and culture, but part of the culture of the Kingdom of God where we sit under King Jesus, and live our lives opposite the world… as suffering servants instead of the attitude “it is all about me and my success.”

    Base your thoughts on the plain teaching of God’s Word and you will never regret it. If you are being abused get help, but let’s stop this nonsense that bases truth on feelings and experiences. This is what Jesus came to set us free from with the truth of the Word. Too any are in bondage to wrong thinking that comes from the flesh, not from God’s perfect ways.

    1. thankful to God i found this blog, thank you lori! I am really learning. My prayers that i can be the woman, mother and wife God wants me to be. Really so blessed!

  9. thankful to God i found this blog, thank you lori! I am really learning. My prayers that i can be the woman, mother and wife God wants me to be. Really so blessed!

  10. Those you quote have clearly denied Jesus Christ, the WORD of God Who came to earth in the flesh.

    “Many will say Lord, Lord…”

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