Her Greatest Desire is to Come Home to Someone
There’s a beautiful 28 year old woman who is a full-time career woman but her greatest desire is to come home to someone so she made a video about her thoughts. She has an aching loneliness. She’s never had a long-term relationship but from her video, it sounds like she has sex with guys. She wonders why she can’t attract a man for long-term. She’s into a bikini model challenge to try to look better thinking this will attract a long-term partner. She hates the fact that every day when she comes home, nobody is there. She always keeps the television on for company. She can’t stand the sound of silence in her home. She also wants to become a mom more than anything. She doesn’t think there’s anything more special than that. She celebrates holidays on her own. She medicates herself with junk food.
Women, this is what feminism has fought for, so why are so many women miserable with their lives? We were never meant to live alone; for God puts the lonely in families (Psalm 68:6). Young women are meant to marry, bear children, and guide the home. This is God’s will for them. His will was never for them to pursue careers, work full time, and live on their own. Yes, some women have no choice but it shouldn’t be the normal like it is today. Marriage rates have never been so low in the history of the United States and neither has the birth rate, but this was feminism’s plan from the beginning.
The sexual revolution brought “free” sex but it’s not free at all. It’s cost women a lot. It’s cost many of them marriage, children, and a home to share with their family. I believe if most women truly took the time to sit down and consider if the path that they are on is good, most of them would say no. Feminism hasn’t helped women in any way. It’s left them lonely and alone. Even if they get married, they rarely have enough time to be a good wife to their husbands and they are taught that serving their husbands is beneath them, but it’s not! If Christ can serve the man who was plotting His crucifixion as an example to us, we can lovingly serve our husbands.
This young woman thinks she will attract a man with a bikini body. She may attract him for sex, but good and decent men usually want more than this to marry. In high school, I had two boyfriends. I never would have sex with them and they both wanted to marry me. Contrary to popular belief, men who want to marry respect women who won’t give away sex without the commitment of marriage. They also want a cheerful woman who doesn’t complain, quarrel, and have a foul mouth, but instead the law of kindness is on her lips. They want a woman who can cook and clean. They want a woman who is warm and loving. Young women need to work a lot harder on their character qualities rather than on their looks. Of course looks matter, but they fade over time while character does not.
God created Eve because He said it wasn’t good for man to live alone. Statistics prove this to be true so, young women, become godly women with gentle spirits. Learn to be joyful and thankful. Practice cooking good meals and keeping a clean home. Become a woman that a good man will one day want to marry and bear his children. Yes, there are good men out there. There will always be a remnant! Oh, and please don’t give away your body for free. Wait for a man who will put a ring on your finger and say, “I do until death do us part.”
Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
1 Peter 3:3, 4
***My contact information on my blog hasn’t been working for the past few months or so, therefore, I haven’t been receiving emails. I just figured this out, unfortunately, so if you have sent me an email and I haven’t responded, you know why now. Please, feel free to email me at thetransformedwife7@gmail.com.
14 thoughts on “Her Greatest Desire is to Come Home to Someone”
I think the man’s greatest desire is to come home to a hardworking devoted wife who will shower him with love and attention at the end of a long hard day of providing!
One of the worst side effects of mothers leaving the home in mass or allowing others to educate and raise them is parents getting used to allowing anyone access to their children with minimal or no supervision. I didn’t finish watching the young woman’s video but because it has happened to so many others it has probably happened to her too, at some point she was probably sexually assaulted to some degree.
It happens to both boys and girls. For many homosexual men, they were sodomized or molested when they were children and many loose women were molested. There is a Beatrix Potter story about a goose who wanted to hatch her own eggs. The farmer’s wife always took the goose’s her eggs away from the goose so the goose flew off to a little hut in the woods. A fox offered for her to lay her eggs in his warm hut. Well of course he was planning on eating the eggs and her himself. When the wise dog of the farm began to wonder what was going on he brought two young dogs and saved her. But her eggs were still crushed and eaten by the puppies in the fray. My children always thought that story was so sad but I tell them it illustrates what happens when you let others watch your children. Ironically enough, a beautiful gift version of the book we have changed the ending to a happy one, therefore teaching children nothing. 🙁
Feminism has caused this woman’s issue of loneliness by lying to women to focus on the wrong things to be happy. Also, like the fox in the Beatrix Potter story, it has also told women to let others focus on mother’s most important gifts. It should be no surprise when that feminism fox devours our children. Unlike the silly goose in the story who wised up at the end and hatched a new nest of eggs next time, we women keep flying back to the hut in the woods thinking that the feminist mindset won’t harm our babies.
Men and women are designed to fall in love and make babies. Isn’t it strange how many focus on being physically healthy but they completely ignore mental and spiritual health? When a man and woman are ready to have sex, the Bible advises them to marry and be together for life. This is the route to true happiness and spiritual health. Sexual immorality and putting family creation in a fully committed marriage on a back burner for material wealth and career is a plan straight from Hell. There is nothing that a unified married team can’t do better together than a single person alone. Please don’t be fooled young men and women!!!!!
I love coming home to my furkids! Seriously, though, it’s lovely when hubby comes home from a long day at work, and my daughter home from her day option activities. That’s when family feels complete.
I feel so incredibly sad when I read stories like the above.
Christian or not, I believe all of mankind seeks commitment and lasting companionship. Marriage gives husband and wife security and stability, something surely everyone must yearn for? It is a travesty that few couples these days are willing to put in the effort it requires. This leads to divorced couples , traumatised children, and as long-term result, those children when they grow up are very often reluctant to marry and have children themselves as they are so afraid of re-living their Trauma. And this again leads to issues like this woman’s.
I hope to give my sons the great gift of security by showing them how much mum+ dad love, serve and respect each other (his serving being the provider to our family and mine being wife, mother and homemaker) so they will hopefully one day aspire to have a loving, caring wife and family themselves and not be afraid to commit.
Hello, I’ve been reading your blog now for a while since you had the viral post about virgins without tattoos. I am a Christian woman that is 30 and I’m still saving myself for marriage. I can completely understand this girls frustration and whether you’re having sex with men are not in today’s world it’s very hard to find someone that wants to have a meaningful relationship.
I was in one long-term relationship that failed because he couldn’t see marrying me without having sex first. The entire relationship was a battle he never wanted to go to church with me even though he said he was a Christian. And I know there’s other women like me out there that are searching for a godly mate but unfortunately this isn’t my parents time nor my grandparents time when it was much easier to find someone that wanted Love and marriage. Now all they want is meaningless sex…. I am so lonely sometimes and I cry myself to sleep often but I continue to put my faith in God and just try to focus on other things.
Sad. She’s pretty and seems nice. She has a pattern of rejecting good men, though. Now, good men reject her.
Our American Christian women are following the same path, and nobody speaks against it unless through blogs like these.
In most conservative countries you can find women as pretty, or prettier than herself – and yet they are humble, and have a kindness and femininity about them that you wonder if they are Christian (most aren’t). Do you still wonder why?
These countries are slowly being infected with feministic doctrine, however. Feminism is like the Borg in Star Trek. Once a country is attacked by it, it’s integration begins and it starts to assimilate more and more like her assailant – until they are unrecognizable from their previous state. Poland comes to mind. Their women act and behave as feminist American gals.
There will always be a remnant, Casey, and there are still good, godly men out there. Keep putting your faith in God and trust Him with your life.
my sister left her husband about 10 yrs ago after being talked into this for over 20 yrs by my mother and a friend. these 2 women tried to stop the wedding, then spent 20 yrs talking trash about her husband. she finally left him and they were overjoyed. now my sis hates her job,has major health issues-mental and physical-she is about collapsed. mother swooped in to help and is doing nothing more than controlling things. poor sis is facing her senior years completely alone and her ex would take her back, but mom has sis believing that ex hub is still not good enough. so misery it is for her all because mom wanted control and wanted to see at least one daughter live out the feminist ideal. so here we are. mom is now trying to get sis to quit job to become a full time care giver for her. what a terrible thing to do. this is an example of a woman in the church doing unbiblical things but the church refuses to teach the truth. mom tried to destroy my marriage because she wanted control of my kids. I have had to put mother out of my life to save my marriage and be a good mom to my kids. she is disappointed in me but thinks sis has such a great life. thanks for continuing to put out the message.
Your blogs, teachings are great, Lori, but I have lived in multiple States, have had many friends, co workers, neighbors. I’m 40 something. I’m not naive or sheltered.. Good true Christian men are exceedingly RARE..even in church.. And I’ve been a church goer for over 30 years, multiple churches.. Good, Christ honoring single men are near extinct. I know this, many of my friends agreed
That was a truly heartbreaking video. When we know the truth, and how much easier life is when we live by faith, seeing people like this struggling is very saddening. You want to tell them that they can step out of this sadness the very instant they will choose to do so. That happiness is there for the taking by putting God first, and yourself last. The heart that loves God truly loves others, and can be loved by others.
This video broke my heart.
I’m a mid-30s guy who has fought tooth and nail to establish myself in this world (1 Tim 5:8) and at this juncture, I look around and the pickings at this point are slim, so slim. Chase a mid-30s woman who has little fertility left, likely a lot of emotional baggage? Chase a young-20s woman but have so much uncommon ground?
Here’s a 28 year old, attractive, clearly has a sweet heart aaaand she has thrown it all away, doesn’t know Christ. Lives completely in the world (obviously lacking discernment, too, by posting intimate feelings and photos on the internet- Prov 4:23).
I can only imagine the feeling of desolation women experience as they age without a stable family. I see it in some of my family members. I hope she finds Christ. Only He can heal her- or any of us- from ourselves.
A dozen of men in my contacts list are athletic (HS varsity+ level), financially stable (80k+ annually), educated (Master tradesmen or BS+ grads), well-spoken etc. who chase knowledge of Scripture down with intensity (annual Bible read-thru’s, men’s groups). These are men who come from good families. All the things a woman looks for to satiate her earthly desires while speaking to the commandments they have as men in God’s creation.
Now, most of us are 5’10, not 6’3. Some of us have battled with an addiction in the past. One of us has battle scars from ‘doing life’ (academics, jobs) that has left him less athletic than he was before (RIP chiseled jawline). But men of God? Held accountable for past indiscretions? Seeking to leave a legacy (for the Kingdom) on Earth? Check, check, check.
What level of ‘godly’ are women in the Church seeking, exactly? How much are the women holding themselves accountable?
Where are the godly women? This will answer the question of ‘where are the godly men?’:
In the order of how to work on things (which is *not* the order of time/effort each day required) which is inside-out:
* Cultivate a quiet and gentle spirit (1 Pet 3:4). No, not argumentative. Avoid politics and empowerment crowds. It is Adam’s task to rule, not Eve’s. Know your place and role (if you get so much as uncomfortable with this simple sentence, you have work to do). Be the soft place to land. You didn’t like the *tone* of what was said? Deep breath, ignore it, move on, like a mantra: ‘quiet and gentle, quiet and gentle.’
* Cultivate a servant’s heart (Phil 2:3-5). No, the tingles you feel when a man extends a nice gesture are not to be trusted (he might be playing you) nor expected (you might be developing entitlement). Eve was made for Adam, Adam was not made for Eve. Be the best Eve possible: serve, do not be deceptive. You serve *him* in *his* mission-in-life.
* Through action alone- no words!- demonstrate all this to your father, a brother- a male kin- with perpetuity (1 Pet 3:1). Not claims of righteousness, not vocalized hurt feelings when you have been wronged. “I’m not a doormat!” Err, don’t be prideful, be the ‘doormat’ if that is what’s required for your given state of emotion.
* Don’t get fat! Don’t get fat, just.. just don’t do it. Grow out your hair (the way a woman takes care of her hair speaks volumes about her to men). But muh body positivity! (Sure, sure, there’s someone for everyone etc etc. but would you rather listen to the sweet lie or be told a bitter truth?) When God put Adam to sleep and formed Eve, He formed for her a body that would be appealing to Adam. Men are visual creatures by design. (SoS will speak in X-rated graphic detail as to the physical desire of man, in a lovely poetry form.)
Here’s the ‘Godly male’ checklist (in order of how observation works):
* Is she physically fit? Is she well ‘put-together?’ Does she do something for me physically? Yes? Hrm, maybe I talk to her.
* “Hi, hello, how-ya-doin.” Oh wow, she’s got great poise, a gentle voice and a soft air about her. Hrm, maybe I engage further. Maybe I re-engage a time or ten.
* Further observations. Is she loving to children, helpful to the elderly? Is it natural or forced? Yes? Gee, it sure would be nice to have a caring mother for children of my own, a wife who would also care for me into old age. Lemme get serious.
Men are directly told to be very cautious with regards to women: 1 Pet 3:3 tells us about the flusies, the fakes. Prov 19:13 tells us about the quarrelsome lot. Prov 7:11 tells us about the busybodies. 1 Tim 2:14 tells us about the deceivers.
What do men want? A pretty, faithful, supportive, gentle woman.
What do men *NOT* want? A disheveled, hot-headed, boisterous, cunning woman.
We will not engage if the options available do not meet muster. We will hold out for a woman who does all these things even if that means we hold out forever. Why? Divorce laws and false legal allegations destroy men financially. A cute honey who has an angry heart will cause nothing but drama down the road. We see all these things to men we know, or elsewhere in society, and the alternative of walking the road of life alone is the better of the options for the raw deal men have today.
If a woman is a godly woman, not putting on a facade, it will show in all the things listed. (This means she is doing all these things for God, not Adam, bc it pleases Him. Adam, being made in God’s image, also likes the things that please the Father.)
Such a woman is so rare in contrast to all your standard fare women today esp ‘in the Church,’ that it has the same effect on men as the volume from a blasting fog horn. She’ll have Godly men coming from out-of-state to court.
Like Boaz, we are checking with our known (usually married) brothers-in-Christ for their affirmation on a sister, sister-in-law, cousin, friend-of-a-friend who checks off the list.. wherever she may be.
But, she is rare indeed. Prov 31 tells us this.
I know your comment was quite a while back but I just wanted to respond–I wish you the best of luck! As someone who married a man 8 years older than her, the age difference hasn’t been as big of an issue as we were afraid. In fact, most of the time, we forget it’s even a thing. I hope you can find someone wonderful!