Was Eve Created Just to Meet Adam’s Emotional Need For Companionship?
A woman named Mary made the following comments under an article on Facebook: “I can’t get over the idea that Eve was created just to meet Adam’s emotional need for companionship (along with others) like she’s his birthday present or ancillary to him or something…How do I interpret 1 Corinthians 11:7? I mean, I get she’s created in the image of God, but it would appear that she’s also just supposed to refract the glory of Adam too, and that just galls me on sooooo many levels. She just exists to shine for Adam and meet all his needs, etc.
“God put Adam and Eve on the planet with the ability to think and feel and speak and reflect Him in all sorts of other ways too. Adam and Eve were supposed to rule over the whole planet with wisdom and care, mirroring how God rules over the whole of existence with wisdom and care. The oneness and harmony between Adam and Eve reflected the oneness and harmony God has with Himself in the trinity. Adam and Eve each reflected God in different but complementary ways and had different but complementary jobs God gave them within a marriage relationship. It was all perfect and unspoiled, a beautifully poetic microcosm of God.
“I struggle with seeing it this way instead: It was a captive situation from the get-go. God is like a creeper holding humankind in a basement demanding they love Him. God put Adam and Eve on the planet with the stipulation that they mirror him and they love him and they do what he says or else. Eve got the shortest end of the stick. She was made to meet Adam’s emotional need for companionship, to be his assistant and aide, to do all the mundane chores around the house, and to just kind of hang around and be ancillary in general. Plus, her jobs within the marriage relationship were the absolute worst.”
So, was Eve created simply to meet Adam’s emotional need for companionship and all of the others things she listed? Does she think it’s better to work for a bosses’ beck ‘n call 9:00 to 5:00 five days a week or for someone else? What does she think is a better plan for woman than God’s? Is being a woman a captive situation from the get-go? Yes, this what the Serpent tried to convince Eve by going over Adam’s headship and directly to her in order to deceive her, and look at the results.
God created men and women differently for different roles. Our bodies, emotions, and minds are different. God created women to be in submissive roles to their husbands for this reason. Orders of authority create order. If Mary works for a boss, her boss is over her. Does she feel like a captive to her boss?
Does God keep us in a basement and demand that we love Him? The only ones I know living in basements are teenagers or young adults who haven’t left home yet, but I seriously doubt that Mary lives in a basement. Doesn’t she enjoy God’s creation and all of the blessings from Him just as much as everyone else? I am sure she does. God doesn’t demand anything from us. He gives us free will. What’s love if there isn’t a choice? He wants us to choose to love Him just as we want our husbands to choose to love us? We certainly couldn’t demand they love us. Love doesn’t work that way.
Did Eve get the short end of the stick and is her job within the marriage relationship the absolute worst? This is what Satan and feminism wants her to believe, and she’s bought the lies and deception hook, line, and sinker. I love being a woman. I loved being able to bear children and be home full time to raise them while my husband worked incredibly hard to provide for us. Was I the one to get the short end of the stick? I don’t think so! You see, Mary thinks that women being denied the curse of “toiling in the soil” as was given to men after the Fall, is the better end of the stick. Many women beg to differ. We LOVE being wives, mothers, and homemakers! Stop listening to the lies of feminism.
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
Romans 12:2
23 thoughts on “Was Eve Created Just to Meet Adam’s Emotional Need For Companionship?”
Yep all lies from the enemy. Good post. God’s ways are always good.
One of the insidious consequences of this kind of thinking is that it reduces women entirely to their sexual function. If a woman does not honor, respect, love or otherwise care for her husband what reason does he have for keeping her around? Men gave much more financial freedom while single than they ever do married and a nagging wife being as scripture says like dripping water, the only thing left a woman has to offer is her body – and that’s exactly what we see have been the wages of “women’s liberation”, the reduction of women to the functions of their body and the entirety of their value being defined by their physical beauty.
It’s such a short sighted and tragic attitude for women to take and even more tragic that they think its empowering.
I tell my husband all the time that I’m glad I don’t have the responsibility of providing for our family. It’s a big job and can be a hard burden for a lot of men. I’m very blessed to be a stay-at-home mom and take care of my kids. I don’t think I got the short end of the stick at all.
Thank you for sharing this post today, Lori.
My understanding of the “o eness and harmony” between husband and wife, or in this case Adam and Eve, was to reflect the oneness and harmony between Christ and his church, not that of the trinity. My thought as I read through all of this was, “Why is it not enough for a woman to simply enjoy her calling in life as a single woman serving the lord, or a wife and/or mother serving at home? Why is it not enough that we get to serve the Lord everyday, whatever it is he calls us to?”
Shortly before all of the lockdowns began, I had started feeling that unrest in my soul, feeling like there’s got to be something more than being a stay-at-home wife and mother. Then the Lord took us on a short detour, as it were. And it halted all of my plans, all of my wandering thoughts.
The Lord is so good. He knows what he’s doing and his plans are always perfect, if we but stop long enough to listen to his quiet voice. The world is so loud, clamoring for our attention. But God quietly waits for each of us as we walk our different journeys, waiting for us to just look to Him.
Thank you for the work that you do, Lori, encouraging us to faithfully walk the path He has set out for us.
Blessings from NM.
Mary’s comment reflects the victim mentality of today. Women are no more slaves of men as men are slaves of their jobs, the laws of the State they live in or God himself. All of us have someone above ourselves whom we serve. We just work better that way.
Yes, it really does boil down to whom we love. Do I love my sinful, selfish, foolish ways better? Or, do I love, believe, and choose to obey, a perfect, wise, all-knowing, Holy, awesome Creator? It is a struggle at times. Yet, just like Eve’s forever ruinous choice of sin, I too have a choice to make …..follow my own self-loving will, or, God’s wonderfully loving and perfectly wise admonitions and principles found in His Word. When I focus on “me, my, mine,” life may seem satisfying at the time, but it fades quickly. But if my focus is on “Him” and following what He commands or desires completely, while life may bring difficulties and hardships, it produces a deep satisfaction and joy.
It IS a battle, I do know well! Having some years (60+) and “scars,” I’ve learned (and am still learning) that when I make a choice that goes against God’s Word, “I” end up on the losing end.
There have been some conversations in our household lately about this very subject. If a person describes themselves as a Christian (Christ follower), a “believer,” and yet does not have a desire and love in their life to read the Scriptures and “hear” what God has to say about how we live… and walk in obedience ……….is this person a genuinely converted, redeemed soul???? This is how we know if we do love God…..if we keep His commandments. And, they are not burdensome!! (I John 5:3) But we can’t know what they are, unless we read them in the Bible. Multiple verses in the Psalms speak of loving His “law,” “commandments.” It seems like so many “Christians” these days, even in the evangelical, Bible-expositing churches, don’t really care to read and know what God has to say about any subject. It’s only the way “I feel” about it that matters.
So… for perspective…… I ask …… whom do I LOVE more…… my “self,” with it’s up-and-down feelings, emotions …… or, God’s stated Word? Which response gives me an inner satisfaction and joy and brings glory to God? And then…. which will I choose to follow?
This young woman should learn quietness and not to spew forth her ignorance or ugliness.
Same here! There is no way I could do what my husband does everyday to provide for the family and to take care of me! Why in the world would i not want to obey him and trust that he makes the decisions that is best for our family? I am home, comfortable and very blessed!
If you look back 150 years ago, for many women, all they had to offer for survival was their body. Prostitution is the oldest “career” in the world. Men have always used women for their bodies. That will probably never change. So women have a choice. They can either do away with men entirely and be completely independent, they can accept being used solely for their bodies, or they can embrace their femininity and be cherished by their men.
Wow, we were just talking about this the other day, (the role of a man and his wife) and I felt a little sorry for my husband, because it seemed to me like he almost got “the short end of the stick” rather than I. I know God makes no mistakes and so His plan for the husband is good, too, and men can enjoy serving God in that plan, but sometimes work is just hard and exhausting and coworkers can be difficult, etc, etc. Plus he has the huge responsibility of being my leader, provider, and protector, and our family’s. And I LOVE working at home! I LOVE being industrious in our own home! I enjoy it so much more than any job. Plus, who gets to spend the most time with the children!? Mom.. So I feel like God has greatly blessed me in the role He gave to me! And then me sweet husband tells me that he appreciates so much what all I do at home and he could never do what all I do! I’m just like “wow!”
My wife again expressed her regular complaint that the children refuse to obey her (while they more readily obey me). She is yet an untransformed wife (even after 25 years) who is often openly disrespectful of me in front of the children.
When I have tried to help her see that her rebellion causes her children to rebel, she just becomes extremely hostile and volatile. I pray that one she can see that honoring the divine model will empower her and give her peace.
I will endure to the end and try my best to help my children, but I fear feminism has too strong hold of my wife.
I am very happy for the women here, especially Lori, and wish that my wife might find her way to the same blessing you have found.
Still Trying…
Base on what you wrote above, I am assuming that your wife is (claims to be) a Christian. With that in mind, I submit the following encouragement.
How are you loving your wife? Are you loving her the way God instructs you to? Are you loving her as Christ loves the church? Jesus is not primarily concerned with our happiness; He is most concerned with our holiness via our ongoing sanctification!
Have you made it your business to get involved in your wife’s holiness and help her with her sanctification? Do you even know that God instructs you to do that? He does.
As a Husband, you are instructed to wash your wife in the water of the Word to help sanctify and cleanse her so that the spots and blemishes will be removed from her (Ephesians 5:25-27).
Your wife has been put under your authority by God and she is to submit to you in everything (Ephesians 5:22-24). She is also commanded to respect you (Ephesians 5:33b).
Have you shown her these verses (actually read them out loud) and explained them to her? Have you explained to her that by not being submissive to you (in everything) that she is in sin? Have you explained to her that by disrespecting you that she is in sin? (Matthew 18:15)
When she becomes hostile and volatile read (Galatians 5:22-23) to her.
Ask her if Jesus is her Lord and Savior; then read (Luke 6:46).
Ask her if she loves Christ; then read (John 14:15).
Then ask her if she is sure that she really is a Christian; then read (1 John 2:3-4).
Speaking scripture into her life and holding up a mirror (comparing her behaviour to what the Word of God says it should be) is WASHING HER IN THE WATER OF THE WORD; it’s loving her as Christ loves the Church. If she has the Holy Spirit in her, this WILL have a positive effect on her. Has any of this even been taught to her? How can she do what she has not heard?
I recommend that you purchase and give to her the following books (written by Godly women) and (gently but firmly) instruct her to read them.
Created To Be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl
The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace
The Transformed Wife by Lori Alexander
Encouraging her to read this BLOG will be helpful (over a longer period of time).
Do you love her enough to do this? If your wife is to respect you as her authority, then you have to (lovingly) act like it. Leaders lead! Brother its up to you to help your wife (and your children) because no one else is going to do it. 25 years is a long time but it’s never too late. God’s blessings awaits your obedience.
Hello Lori
Many heartfelt thanks for your ministry. Your teachings on biblical womanhood have transformed my life and my marriage for the better. Finding your blog was actually an answer to prayer for me a couple of years ago…I literally pleaded with God to show me what was His plan for me (ie working outside the home to supplement my husband’s income (my husband’s preference) or staying at home to care for my husband and home (my deepest desire)). Not long after pleading with God to show me once and for all what His purpose was for me I found your blog and the “lights turned on” so to speak. I knew after years of being in church and never hearing about women being “keepers at home” (as referred to in the King James Version of Titus 2:3-5) that I was finally being told the truth! Learning about true biblical womanhood has set me free not put me in a prison! Deep down, I have always loved the idea of taking care of my husband, our home and being there for our children full-time, but it wasn’t always possible. Now I am a full-time help-meet to my husband and keeper-at-home, I feel free to do so with the blessing, power and authority of God. This is true empowerment…to know I am finally in the perfect will of God at nearly fifty years of age!
I should mention that I have also had a career as a lawyer, but I would never go back to that unfulfilling, demanding career. It robbed me of many precious years as a full-time wife and mother and I experienced some of the worst evils (sexual harassment and bullying) that God tries to protect women from by commanding them in Titus 2:3-5 that they should be keepers-at-home.
Now, with God’s help, my husband and I are trying to reverse the damage done to our daughters by us buying into the feminist agenda – even as God loving, God-fearing (but not perfect!) parents.
I do have a question please Lori that I would greatly appreciate your wisdom and insight concerning. It is whether, like Abraham’s wife Sarah, I should call my husband “Lord” (or Sir)? I do my best to respect, reverence and submit to my husband as my head, so this is not the purpose of my question. It’s just I am used to calling my husband usual terms of endearment such as Darling, and Lord or Sir seem unnatural to me. I would love your opinion on this please.
Thank you again Lori. God bless you, Ken and your family.
Eve is God’s final creation. That’s pretty cool if you think about it.
You don’t need to call him lord, Mrs. P. Sarah did this to show her reverence towards her husband as we all are called to do. Keep calling him darling.
Thank you for your response Lori. I agree 🙂 God bless.
9:00 – 5:00? I wish. If I am needed, my manager has my cell. I have been called after midnight, after getting home after 11:00 from working out of town. Now, I am not complaining. My wife spent her share of nights up with our kids while they were younger, as did I. We both play important roles to ensure our family’s needs are met and our kids are bathed in the Scriptures.
Sarah calling Abraham “lord” would have come very natural to her as one of the Old Testament words for “husband” is the Hebrew word “baal”. Which literally means “owner, lord”.
According to Strong’s Concordance
baal: owner, lord
Original Word: בַּעַל
Part of Speech: Noun Masculine
Transliteration: baal
Phonetic Spelling: (bah’-al)
Definition: owner, lord
It is used that way referring to a husband in Genesis 20:3, Exodus 21:3, Exodus 21:22, Deuteronomy 22:22, Deuteronomy 24:4, 2 Samuel 11:26, Esther 1:17, Esther 1:20, Proverbs 12:4, Proverbs 31:11, Proverbs 31:23 and Proverbs 31:28.
In Old Testament times, daughters legally were owned by their fathers and upon marriage (being purchased) became owned by their husbands.
The significance of this in the New Testament (1 Peter 3) is that wives should still consider their husbands to be their owners (their lord) and treat them as such; submitting to them, reverencing them and obeying them.
The New Testament equivalent of the Hebrew word “baal” is the Greek word “kurios”.
According to Strong’s Concordance
kurios: lord, master
Original Word: κύριος, ου, ὁ
Part of Speech: Noun, Masculine
Transliteration: kurios
Phonetic Spelling: (koo’-ree-os)
Definition: lord, master
Usage: lord, master, sir; the Lord.
HELPS Word-studies
2962 kýrios – properly, a person exercising absolute ownership rights; lord (Lord).
Paul explains to us in Ephesians 5 that God created marriage to be a picture of the relationship between Christ and the church, where the husband represents Christ and the wife represents the church. We as Christians properly acknowledge our relationship to Christ when we call Him “Lord”, understanding that we were bought with a price and are owned by Him.
If a wife properly understands Gods design for marriage; views (and treats) her husband as the bible instructs that she should, it would not at all feel unnatural for her to call her husband “lord” any more than it feels for us to call Jesus our Lord when we properly understand our relationship to him.
Dear Lori,
What a bless to read your posts,i used to be a career woman in my family,it was all well for first few years but i was not at peace,my career was skyrocketing and all good as people said.But, i was not content and peaceful,my heart was troubled and prayed to God to lead me. I was tossed when i decided to resign becaused many people would question my decision and i felt as a failure.After having my 2nd child,i stayed at home ,my husband become sole breadwinner, and nurture my children like i always want. I feel overjoyed and blessed to have this opportunity to be fulltime with my children. It does feel so natural,i love being at home to teach my children,cook food,homedecor,gardening,baking,etc. But many times,i would still look for encouragement as i doubt whether this is the correct path amid feminism culture and society expectation.Thank you for helping me to affirm my woman role as God loving creation.??
Ask your husband how he would like to be addressed. I agree with Trey’s comment but ultimately ask your husband.
I love the truth in this post and it is all truth.
love, love, respect this post.