What Do Husbands Think About Their “New” Submissive Wives?
What do husbands who have wives who have become submissive wives think about their wives now? Do they like the “new” wife or do they miss the old one? A woman asked this question on my Facebook page so I decided to ask the women in the chat room to ask their husbands. Ken answered the woman on Facebook:
“I can tell you that my marriage has been revolutionized since Lori has chosen to be a submissive wife. No more arguing, peace in my home and in my own skin, love where I know that she desires to put me first now instead of last. I used to be stressed out constantly hoping I would not upset my wife by saying or doing things she didn’t like. It wasn’t overt so much as a frown on her face, a snide remark, or becoming distant and aloof. I don’t have to fear that anymore and she is so much happier knowing she doesn’t have to be in control of my and our lives. Instead, harmony reigns.”
Maggie wrote: “My husband would say that he gets to eat dinner at home. Years back I never considered starting dinner until after he arrived, then he would eat dinner at his mom’s every night before he came home and I’d be livid. It put a wedge between my MIL and him and me. Now that I know my role, he comes home to a hot meal and he doesn’t take it for granted.”
Evie: “I’ll ask him when he wakes up (still on his night shift schedule) but the main thing he always mentions is how the arguing is now nonexistent. We have literally nothing to fight about thus far because most of our past arguments derived from household chores and decisions being made.”
Molly: “My husband said out of the blue that I was much more ‘live and let live’ instead of bossy. I was really happy to hear that.”
Kayla: “’Smoother, not so much stress, and hardly any fighting’ is what my husband said. Man of few words but I’d never really asked him if he noticed a change and it’s nice to know he has.”
Michelle: “My dear husband says that there is more peace in the house. There is rarely any arguments between us. I also demonstrate my role as a wife and mother by being more joyful.”
Debbie: “He said I don’t get upset or mad very easily anymore. He likes that I get ‘upset’ now if he doesn’t let me get his food or drink refills. Being open with all things financial (purchases, etc), asking him for permission instead of just going out on my own about everything.”
Libby: “He told me our home is more enjoyable. He said before I found this group, he knew I was trying to let him lead, but he said once I found y’all I have really stepped into my proper place. He also said he is enjoying that I am teaching this to our daughter as well; that we need to take care of dad, and be happy to see him.”
Rayma: “Mine says he doesn’t believe it yet…(looks like he needs some time…I only asked for his forgiveness for my rebellious, disrespectful, unsubmissive behavior a few months ago, at which point he said he can’t forgive me, because I couldn’t change the past). BUT I can see in his actions that he is actually simply enjoying being home more. He talks to me. He has moved back into our shared room. He lets me know what his work schedule is like. He spends time with me and the kids taking day trips – things that never happened before! The BIG WALL OF BITTERNESS we both built to distance ourselves is finally cracking!!!”
Cassie: “He said that I don’t think I am in charge of the marriage any more.”
Some men have responded on my blog that they don’t want submissive wives. They don’t know what they are missing!
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Ephesians 5:22-24
7 thoughts on “What Do Husbands Think About Their “New” Submissive Wives?”
Mine said several years ago that he felt free to do the things he has the burden to do for God! And he also did begin to do special things for me ( buying things I like, staying with the kids while I had a homeschooling mom’s breakfast). That’s nice, I’ll ask him again today what he thinks, 10 years after the beginning of my new life as a submissive wife ?!
I think as a Christian husband for me it would be just a bug giant deep breathe I guess I can only speak for myself but I would enjoy my wife just not to be so confrontational and arguementsrive and Be sincere about change.
I believe a true Christian man desires a wife whom isn’t perfect because we aren’t either, but just a sincere loving wife whom appreciates his hard work
The “new” submissive wife isn’t really something I guess I should be commenting on as our marriage is in such turmoil. But I love my wife when she is “genuine” and “real”. It’s sad because sometimes I make excuses to be gone longer or stay away an extra hour or two, because when I get home I get unloaded on!! 🙂
Interesting, the biggest thing mentioned is less strife or less arguing. Thus a reduction in anger, resentment, bitterness, and grudges being held.
One area that I woudl like to see did the men have to earn the right to have a submissive wife or did the wives willingly submit? In other words did the man have to be a super husband before the wife submitted? I know of a wife who gave her husband a list of what she expected of him before she would submit. I found that to be a bit odd and I am thinking backwards. Yet we hear from some of the Christian ministries for the family that the man has to do X, Y, and Z just in order to earn the right for the wife to think about submitting.
What I have observed the husband is more able and will be stronger in his leadership in the family if the wife woudl first submit.
With all of them, the wives chose to cheerfully submit to their husbands as unto the Lord. Some of them decided to do it even with difficult husbands and saw great improvement almost immediately in their marriages.
My husband has really been getting upset with me as he says i have been answering him back. Its getting old. Ive said to him the reason i do it is because he will say something about my character or misjudge my intention and i start to clarify or explain myself. I find it difficult to just sit there and smile and take it. I try to be respectful but when you feel like you are being unjustly treated or judged its difficult to stay silent. He said maybe the reason he says such things is maybe he can see things about a situation that i cant. But what upsets me most is he says it with an air like he thinks he is god and i should treat him as such. Now i know that is not the case. Its just how it is said. (Tone of voice etc) or he will make a statement in general conversation and ill add my thouhts agreeing with him and he snaps at me for answering him back. And i feel confused about how ive done that. I love him dearly but that is something im struggling with at the moment. I feel like i should just keep my mouth closed and not talk. It feels like i only open it to change feet at the moment. But then that would annoy him too that im not talking. ( and i can talk the hind leg off a mule!) ?
I will accept that some women claim to be submissive to their husbands. Candace Cameron Bure of Full House is one making such a claim.
But I have yet to actually meet one. I will thus reserve my opinion for the time when I do.
I am also going through the same thing, when i speak he gets angry when I keep quiet he gets angry. i get confused all the time