Which Proverbs Woman are You?

Which Proverbs Woman are You?

There are two types of women described all throughout the book of Proverbs. One is a godly woman and one is a foolish woman. I read through the entire book and noted all of the references made specifically to woman excluding Proverbs 31. First, I will give you the verses of foolish women to make sure none of these describe any of us!

“It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman” (Proverbs 21:19).

Contentious means given to angry debate and quarrelsome. It’s easy for us to want our own way and to be right but this isn’t what God calls us to do nor be. There are so many Christians books and articles about how to “fight fair” in marriage but according to the Word of God, we shouldn’t be fighting at all. “And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men” (2 Timothy 2:24). Strive means to struggle or fight vigorously. As women, we are called to have meek and quiet spirits, therefore, we must not quarrel or fight with our husbands.

“It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house” (Proverbs 21:9)

Brawling means the act of quarreling. Again, we are told to NOT quarrel. It should have no place in our lives. If you struggle with quarreling with your husband, ask him to call you out on it every time you begin to quarrel and immediately stop! It’s a hard habit to break (I know), but worth the effort. Peace in a marriage is a beautiful thing!

“It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman and in a wide house.” (Proverbs 25:24)

This verse is given twice (Proverbs 21:9)! Again, we are warned against quarreling.  It would be better for a man to be exposed to the harsh heat of the sun, wind, and winter on a roof rather than live with a quarreling wife in a big and beautiful home. It will drive a man crazy! God commands wives to submit to their husband and when wives do this, quarreling stops immediately since they understand his headship over them.

“The contentions of a wife are a continual dripping” (Proverbs 19:13)

“A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike” (Proverbs 27:15)

Twice we are told that a quarreling wife is like a “continual dripping.” I am sure you have heard a faucet that drips, drips, drips and it can drive you crazy because it is so constant and so annoying. This is what you sound like to your husband if you quarrel with him. Choose to bite your tongue rather than quarrel with your husband. Let him be right all the time if need be. Big deal!

“As a jewel of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion” (Proverbs 11:22)

Discretion means being wise and having common sense and good judgement. A woman who has no discretion (isn’t wise and doesn’t have common sense or good judgement) is compared to a piece of jewelry in a pig’s nose. As godly woman, we are called to be discreet. We are to be wise in avoiding errors and evil and do what is right and good according to God’s Word.

“She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house” (Proverbs 7:11).

This is completely opposite of having meek and quiet spirits. We aren’t to be loud. We aren’t to be stubborn and insist on having our own way. Our feet are in our homes as keepers at home where the Lord has commanded that we be. We don’t go out marching for our “rights”  and demanding that we be heard. No, we work quietly and hard in our homes taking care of our families while giving all of our concerns to the Lord. He is mighty to save! We study to be quiet, do our own business, and work with our own hands (1 Thessalonians 4:11). We don’t have a sense of entitlement and wanting things for free but are content with our lot in life; for godliness with contentment is great gain.

“A foolish woman is clamorous: she is simple, and knoweth nothing” (Proverbs 9:13)

Clamorous means speaking and repeating loud words, being noisy and turbulent. Without Christ’s Spirit working mightily within us, we will not be meek and quiet spirited women. As our culture spirals downwards, women become more loud and turbulent. This is why we need to be in the Word and allow His Spirit to transform us into His image.

“Three things the earth is disquieted…an odious woman when she is married” (Proverbs 30:23)

Odious means hateful, offensive to the senses, and disgusting. There seems to be many women who are hateful and disgusting these days. You can see it all over Facebook, during the feminist marches, and watching them on TV with their immodesty, unfeminine behavior, and foul language. I can tell you one thing, it’s so very ugly! The poor, poor men who are married to odious women. What a pity.

“A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones” (Proverbs 12:4)

Virtuous means morally good, practicing the moral duties, and abstaining from vice. Are you good? Are you washed by the blood of the Lamb? Have you been cleansed from your sin and walk in newness of life? Do you love the Lord Jesus, His Word, and seek to obey Him in every area of your life?

“Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands” (Proverbs 14:1)

With wisdom we build up our homes. Where do we find wisdom? We find it in God’s Word. We must be in His Word daily, then we must apply it to our lives. We must continually renew our minds with truth and take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. We must seek counsel and learn from godly, older women who have walked the path before us. If we don’t do this and instead are led by our emotions and feelings, we will be foolish women who tear down our own homes.

“Whoso finds a wife finds a good thing, and favour of the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22)

Yes, marriage is ordained by God. It was not good for man to be alone so God created a help meet for him. Unfortunately, many women don’t understand their created purpose but for those who do, their husbands are blessed men indeed!

“A prudent wife is from the Lord” (Proverbs 19:14)

Prudent means cautious and practically wise. She has common sense, lives within her husband’s income, obeys biblical principles, and loves her husband deeply. She is a pleasure to live with.

“A gracious woman retains honor” (Proverbs 11:6)

Gracious means she is kind, friendly, and forgives easily (merciful). She is not easily offended, doesn’t hold onto grudges, and lives her life for eternity. She loves people more than things, is not envious of others and what they have, and has learned to be moderate in all things (1 Corinthians 9:25).

My question for you: Are you building your home up with wisdom and sound judgment or are you tearing it down with your emotions and feelings? Which Proverbs woman are you?

14 thoughts on “Which Proverbs Woman are You?

  1. This was an EXCELLENT Bible study this morning. I am recording all these scriptures in my journal 📓 today. Yes, Lori, we do need to be in God’s Word daily renewing our minds and allowing His Spirit to transform us. God is willing to work mightily within us. The question is: 🤔are we willing ?! Thanks for the reminder.

  2. You are loved VT2!!! So thankful for the admonishment!! Keep them coming!!! Passing these excellent posts to many in my circle! Love you and never have we met – GOD IS TO BE PRAISED!!! Singing a great hymn from Fanny Crosby “To God Be the Glory!”

  3. This is exactly why I come back to your blog Lori, it causes me to stop and think how I have been towards my dear husband, he absolutely deserves my respectful behavior because the Word of God tells me this. Thank you for these reminders!

  4. I loved reading this so much. Such a good reminder! And I enjoyed seeing all the verses together in one spot. Thank you.

  5. I really needed this reminder this morning. My husband and I got into a huge argument last night. What started it was that he was trying to discipline our son for doing something without asking him first. But, I chimed in to defend our son because it was my idea and I gave permission. My husband still wanted to discipline him since he didn’t ask first. My husband, of course, yelled at me for defending our son, even though I didn’t see why he should be punished for my decision. This then led to a fight and we both like to win (doesn’t everyone). How should I have handled this? Just be meek and quiet and let my son take the heat?

    1. Another thing, I thought it would have been wrong for me not to admit my part in the decision, because my son did not speak up about my involvement.

      1. In our house, if either parent gives permission, then that counts as permission. However, if one parent says no, so the child goes to the other parent who says yes, then that is punished, as it’s deception.

        In that situation you describe above, in our house, I would have absolutely defended my son. And once my husband realized our son had *my* permission, that would have been enough. If my husband disagreed with me giving permission, that would have been between us, not our son.

        It is NEVER wrong to defend our children, I don’t think. There are respectful ways of doing so, obviously, but it needs to be done. Letting your son get in trouble unfairly is wrong. In my opinion, anyway.

        1. Thanks for your opinion KAK. I don’t really think my husband was fully listening to my side of the story. He has voiced before he doesn’t want to be corrected by me, especially in front of our children. He feels disrespected that way. My son wasn’t speaking up about my involvement in the decision. It was solely my idea. He was at work at that time. I try to bite my tongue, but when my kids are being wrongly accused, I can’t help but to help them!

          Maybe I should just take my husband to the side gently and tell him the real story once his anger has passed. Then I don’t get in the middle of anything and things have calmed down. I love my husband, but sometimes he jumps to the extreme in situations. Oh, well, lessons we must learn in life.

  6. As a kid growing up with an argumentative, manipulative mother, I can tell you our house was not fun. Even harder because my dad was a minister. We listened to her critique of his sermons over lunch each Sunday. After a while, he just quit having lunch at home and we began going out to eat so she could not do this. We rarely had meals as a family, and this may have been the reason. As a result I try not to be bossy,critical, and rude. I do not always succeed. But your teachings have helped more than you know.

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