Marriage is the Ministry Exalted for Young Women
The Apostle Paul commanded the “aged women” to teach the “young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed” (Titus 2:3-5). Then in 1 Timothy 5:14, he commands this of the young widows, “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.”
When I use this verse in 1 Timothy to encourage young women to marry, bear children, and guide the home, women have angrily responded to me by saying that this verse is only for young widows. Why would Paul’s instructions to young widows be any different than those for all young women? Is it simply a way for women to get out of doing what God asks them to do? Do they use Scripture to manipulate it to say what they want it to say? Is there anywhere in God’s Word that commands women to leave their homes each day and work for a boss? Paul’s instructions to young widows are no different than his instructions to all young women.
Joseph Spurgeon recently preached a sermon on this topic:
“We have a plethora of young women in the church who are willing to travel the globe for Jesus but not many who are willing to do the hard work of digging in, planting foundations, and loving a husband and children. It is easier to serve children you can leave behind after a few months than it is to serve your own. It is easier to serve strangers we meet on the streets whom we will never see again than it is to love our own families.
“Yet which of these things is commended in our passage? What are the things that are lifted up as keeping with sound doctrine? It is not as if mission trips, college, seminary, and other endeavors are not good things, but in our passage, they are not considered the normal way of things. Instead, older women are commanded to teach the young women to love their husbands. Marriage is the ministry that is exalted here.
“Yet we live in a period of incredible decline for marriage. The one thing to which young women are commended here is the one thing they are not doing in our time.”
We don’t have a problem with “toxic masculinity” in this culture.” We have a problem with toxic feminism. It’s feminism that is toxic and has destroyed biblical womanhood for most women in the churches who have gone the way of the culture. Women are taught to not want to be married. They’re taught to not want children. Why want this when they can pursue their own career and make their own money? Women need to stop believing the lies they are being told and search God’s Word instead for truth in how they are to live. His will is for them to marry, bear children, and guide the home.
Women have told me how hard it is to be married and have children and ask why I don’t write about this. Hard isn’t bad! God doesn’t ask us to live comfortable lives in which we only live to please ourselves. No, He asks us to live sacrificial lives that require hard work and giving ourselves away for a higher purpose. Our culture is one of self-seeking rather than God-seeking.
Read the entire sermon by Joseph Spurgeon linked above. Yes, some of you aren’t married, yet you would love to be. Pray consistently. Pour your heart out to the Lord and wait upon Him. The same goes for those of you who are infertile. The Lord knows you are grieving. Most godly young women want more than anything to be married and have children. God knows this since He created you to want this. Wait for His timing, dear women. He hears your cries. He is a good God and His plan for you is good. In the meantime, He can use you in powerful ways for His Kingdom in your singleness.
Thou art good, and doest good; teach me thy statutes.
Psalm 119:68
12 thoughts on “Marriage is the Ministry Exalted for Young Women”
Being married to a strong man is an honor and privilege. Not a burden or enslavement!
I really enjoyed your post! I was recently married on October 6th 2018. (Our one year is coming up) I’ve been trying to follow the Lords plan for a homemaker but we don’t have any children and I constantly feel like I’m not doing enough. I work all day, and I don’t get a sense of purpose from it. What can you suggest would help make me feel more purposeful?
Here’s a video of a woman who hasn’t been able to have children yet but she finds joy and contentment at home. I don’t have any children at home and I still LOVE being home to help whomever needs help.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJZX7WTdfaM
I’m married. There are many rules, for want of a better word, for wives in the bible. It has to be done Gods way. Marriage is a demonstration of Christ and the church. I still think that there is no where near enough teaching on marriage and bringing up children in churches. I’m sure that is why young women look for other things to do, they are not taught what an honour and privilege it is to be a Christian wife.
Another great read. I have been reading from Scripture and other things revealed to me -about all of your recent postings. It seems whenever I feel God speaking to me strongly about something you post the same exact topic.
Lori I have a personal question, we only have 2 kids. My husband got a vasectomy years ago and recently I have been wanting more children, I am only 30. We discussed it, my husband is a little reluctant. He says he is also enjoying us the way we are. Should we try to get a vasectomy reversal , he is on the fence, or leave things as they are? I discussed it with him, and am leaving it at that. But I wanted your opinion on this.
Share your thoughts with your husband and then pray about it. Ultimately, it will be your husband’s decision whether or not he wants to have a reversal.
Terrific post. You are so right that it seems almost driven out of young women and girls to want a husband and children. It was my one desire in life, and I am truly blessed to have a husband who is loving. I really don’t know why God chose me for this wonderful man. We have been unable to have children, and it now seems we will be childless. I’d be curious to hear if you have any thoughts on using donor eggs.
It’s a choice that should be made by you and your husband after a lot of prayer.
Thank you, I appreciate your comment. Thank you for teaching that God has a plan for me and it is good.
I don’t believe I will ever be married again and I am severely depressed about it. I am divorced from my abusive ex husband who refused to change even though I went back. I got pregnant and was going to marry my child’s father only to find I was once again with an abusive man and now he will always be apart of my life. I’m trying to enjoy motherhood but I know I have cursed myself. I’m 25 and I don’t fit in anywhere. Women in the church my age are either married or single and don’t have kids. I have always longed to be married but I know it won’t ever happen for me because of my choices in life.
Marriage to a good man is a blessing and more people should treasure it. Because good men are hard to find.
I love this so much! 100% agree. I’m a mother to seven children and home serving my husband and blessings. It is a high, high honor. It’s a very spiritual and amazing position. My work is hard- very hard. I’d rather be home raising arrows. I love that God made me a woman and that’s i have a womb. I’m happy to receive every blessing God grants me to carry, birth and raise. To submit to my husband, obey him and help him is sexy, in my opinion. Obviously, he cares for me and is loving so it’s naturally a joy to submit, listen and help serve him. There’s such a misconception about that role as a Christian woman. It is a very beautiful thing. Anyway, I just really enjoyed this read. Thank you! ❤️
Sadly, you can’t have this ministry if a man doesn’t choose you, no matter how much you desire it and no matter how righteously you live. What should an unchosen woman in her mid-20s do? It seems like working is going to drive away men who’ll think she’s a feminist career woman.