Smart Phone Addiction Has Taken Over Relationships
When I was raising my children, I didn’t know anyone who homeschooled but in junior high, I decided to homeschool my sons. I didn’t like what I was seeing going on in the public junior and senior high schools. We found a small, private, Christian school that we eventually sent all of our children to high school for one to four years. The Headmaster was a godly man who wanted Christ to be glorified in this school.
When we attended football games, everyone was either intently watching the game and/or chatting with those around them. It was the same for basketball and baseball games. We made a lot of new acquaintances and friends during these games. During lunch, the kids would hang out with each other chatting and simply being together. There were relationships and nothing to detract them when they were out and about.
The year after my youngest child graduated, smart phones came out and it seemed everyone had them. My sister said that her oldest son, who went to high school with my children, would have friends over and they would all laugh and talk the entire time. Her youngest son was a year younger than my youngest child and when he would have his friends over, all of them would be buried in their smart phones. Their smart phones were more important than being with the people they were with.
I can’t even imagine high school football, baseball, and basketball games these days. Almost everyone must be buried in their smart phones. The same must be happening at school lunches. Smart phones have taken over relationships.
My sister has a policy that when people come over to her house for dinner, that they can’t look at their smart phone. She wants the company to focus upon each other instead of the phones. I don’t blame her. It is fun to have meals at her home and have everyone paying attention to each other instead of their phones.
It must be more difficult being a young mother these days with the distraction of smart phones. I didn’t have this while raising my children and there were enough distractions back then without the added one of smart phones. Do everything in your power to keep it from having mastery over you. You master it. Your children and raising them is much more important than anything you will see or read on your smart phones. Give yourself a time limit on your phone and discipline yourself to keep it.
I believe our culture has lost a lot due to smart phones. People care more about their phones than they do about the people who live under their roofs or are right next to them. Don’t allow them to control you! We are to be known for our temperance and our love. We must use moderation with our phone and love others enough to put them ahead of our phones.
All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.
1 Corinthians 6:12
12 thoughts on “Smart Phone Addiction Has Taken Over Relationships”
Fantastic post!!! Great reminders!!!
I LOVE that you posted this! I read your blog daily for encouragement and wisdom as a mama to 3 under 3! Last week I actually made the decision to ditch the iPhone and went back to my old flip phone and already I have noticed a huge difference in my productivity and decrease in anxiety!
Right now I’m on my phone quite often because I have an Instagram dedicated to biblical womanhood and I can afford the time to be available to have conversations with other women. However, I do not absentmindedly pick up my phone anymore. I use up my time reading actual books, especially my Bible, write, tidying up my room, looking after my baby brother, going outside, visiting with my fiancé, and cross-stitching. When I get married, I’ll have to add cleaning my home, cooking food, and spending time with my husband among all the other household responsibilities. I’m hoping that as I have more to do, I do it well enough that I don’t even have the time to waste on my phone.
I am a SAHM and HS and have run several businesses off these phones. In our home they are seen as a portable computer on which ONLY parents work. The more urgent need for all families is the Word of God.
Smart phone technology and social media is based on the brain. They know what types of movements release dopamine in the brain which gives you a high feeling. For example, swiping on Facebook to see posts activates the reward centers in the brain and dopamine is released. Having your posts liked also activates the reward centers. You basically get addicted to the release of brain chemicals.
My husband and I didn’t know all this with our first 3 kids who are now adults and we let them have cellphones when they turned 15 to 16 years old. My last 7 will not have a cellphone until they are 18 and buy their own. I have been told you can still buy the old flip phones that don’t access the internet and can only call and text but I haven’t looked into that.
Nothing has changed in the 1,000’s of years since God’s word was written.
Now they don’t even have to leave their home.
Just pick up your phone.
I know lots of people that have their phone in their hand 24/7/365
They literally take their phone with them everywhere, to the bathroom, to the shower, to bed when they sleep.
1 Timothy 5:13 KJV
And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not.
Idle –
Not employed; unoccupied with business; inactive; doing nothing.
Slothful; given to rest and ease; averse to labor or employment; lazy; as an idle man; an idle fellow.
Tattlers –
One who tattles; an idle talker; one that tells tales.
Busybodies –
A meddling person; one who officiously concerns himself with the affairs of others.
Maybe we should just set that phone aside and only pull it out on occasion.
Maybe that is why my extended family doesn’t want to hold family gatherings at my place – because I have no cell phone signal here. lol
I still have a *dumb* phone lol. I buy 60 minutes every 3 mos. I have over 1300 minutes accrued so you can see how much time I DON’T spend on it lol. It’s for emergencies.
Great post Lori ! This is spot on!
I took Facebook off my phone and have found my mood is so much better.
My teenagers keep in near-constant contact with their friends via social media though, so they’re nearly always on their phones. We have a rule that they’re not allowed at the table, or after 9pm. But they’re certainly addictive and it’s a very hard habit to break.
I completely agree – and got rid of my phone about 10 years ago, as I wanted to set a good example to my children. My husband still has one but he needs one for work. We are trying to find one that is not a smart phone but that is not a challenge for texting – hard to find (any suggestions?). I can’t wait for the day he can get rid of his phone!
I notice people walking around, HOLDING their phones, for even just a little walk – for example, someone came to buy chickens from us tonight – and the man left his car and walked around our chicken area –clutching his phone. Why would you need a phone for the purchase of a chicken?
You don’t.
Boy, isn’t this the truth. I’ve asked my husband to block some apps on my phone (like YouTube) or certain websites (like Pinterest) since I was spending way too much time on them. It’s true that it is an addiction. I don’t have any form of social media. I wish I did on the one hand, because I live far away from friends and family, but I know it would suck my time away.
I recently just got a “smartflip” it allows me to Google and check email, has maps and YouTube. But it is basically a flip phone so not many other bells and whistles. Perfect! My house is already so much cleaner lol which I used to think there just wasn’t enough time to clean….it’s amazing what not scrolling instagram for 3+ hours a day can give you!! 🙂