Am I Teaching Men Through Blogging?
Women have asked me if I am violating 1 Timothy 2:12 because men read my blog and I teach what the Bible has to say about this issue. Women are not to teach nor to usurp authority over men and I desire more than anything to be obedient to the Word of God. It’s not a legalistic “rule-follower” thing for me but a love for the Lord.
I believe that anyone who reads my blog for long at all will know that I teach women. In fact, women get angry with me because I don’t teach “the other side” about men loving their wives. It’s not my place to teach men their role. In fact, by teaching men their roles hurts my purpose of helping women become better wives because their focus is on their husband’s behavior instead of their own. Plus, I would be disobeying the Lord if I set out to purposely teach men.
Yes, some men do read my blog and comment on it. I am aware of this but their comments that I allow on my blog are usually teaching comments from godly men who add to what I have taught. I appreciate their input. Ken writes for my blog once in a while for a male perspective. There’s nothing wrong with us learning from men. I won’t publish a comment I disagree with unless I have Ken respond because I don’t want to be teaching men. This blog is for women and teaching them what the Lord instructs older women to teach younger women.
If a man writes me privately for advice, I always forward it to Ken. He has received numerous emails from men wanting marriage advice and has developed some strong friendships with some of these men. I refuse to give men advice about these things since I know it’s not my place to do so.
I have stopped teaching the major doctrines of the Word for this reason. It’s best to learn these from godly male preachers/teachers, in my opinion. All of the Prophets, Priests, Disciples, and Authors of the Bible were men and all elders and deacons (leaders of the church) are to be men so I am convicted to allow men to teach the main parts of the Word and let the woman learn in silence with all subjection (1 Timothy 2:11). And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church (1 Corinthians 14:35).
Women need to be in the Word for themselves, however, by studying, meditating, memorizing, and reading it daily since it is what transforms them. There are great commentaries for further research. I use a highlighter, pen, and notebook as I am studying along with my KJV Bible which I love the most, the 1828 Webster’s Dictionary (I have an app on my phone) and biblehub.com for commentaries.
There’s nothing that can replace personal study of God’s Word and it will shield women from falling for false teachers. I recommend reading a gospel (Matthew through John), then Romans through Revelation, Psalms, and Proverbs over and over again since these are the most relevant for us today. Even if it’s only a chapter a day, women, commit to knowing the Word for yourself.
I am in no way a preacher. I have no desire to stand in front of a body of believers comprised of men and women and speak. I just wouldn’t be comfortable in doing this. I do love to teach and I love to teach women. I try hard to stay focused upon women’s issues and roles and anything to do with the home and health. Of course, I use a lot of Bible to support what I teach but if women are looking for some good Bible teaching, I point them to some great male Bible teachers to learn from.
I realize that this is not a popular position and there are many women teaching the Bible. I am not standing in judgment of them because these are my convictions from studying the Word. If perfect sinless Eve who walked in the garden with God could be deceived and one of the reasons given for women not teaching nor being in authority over men was due to being deceived, I don’t want to be responsible for deceiving the women who read my blog when it comes to the deep truths of the Word.
What is ironic is that when I used to teach doctrine, they were my most unpopular posts. It was always my posts on submission, being keepers at home, modesty, etc. that were the most popular. I believe women are hungry to know their God-given roles in life and I love to teach them. Why should I teach the meat of God’s Word when there are so many godly men who teach it and so very few older women* teaching younger women what God wants them to know?
That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
Titus 2:4, 5
*I qualify as an older woman since I am almost 59 years old, have been married for over 36 years, raised four children, and am blessed with five grandchildren! The LORD is good.
32 thoughts on “Am I Teaching Men Through Blogging?”
“I have stopped teaching the major doctrines of the Word for this reason. It’s best to learn these from godly male preachers/teachers, in my opinion. ”
Good for you, Lori! That takes guts!! 🙂
I don’t have time to comment every day, but I read every post! Keep up the good work!
Thank you, Diana! It’s best I stick with what the Lord has specifically commanded that I teach.
Amen to everything you say, dear sister. You are such a blessing!
Hello, And you answered this very well in your post! Keep it up and do what you are doing as I can bet it has helped more than a few marriages!
Yes, God is so good and He alone has blessed us!
Always, Roxy
Thank you! There’s nothing else I would rather do than to teach younger women the ways of godly womanhood.
Thank you, Roxy! Yes, teaching God’s ways always helps marriages since He knows everything and created us. His ways are best. Blessings to you!
As a married man whom is in Christ I comment on Lori’s blog occasionally because it’s strong biblical truth and rather your a husband or wife that’s what we all need to hear. Lori is sharing her life because it’s encouraging to others and does a good job at standing strong against the enemy whom would like us all to believe she is wrong. Lori is not perfect and neither am I but what Lori is is a godly Christian woman whom is a blessing to us all who read her blog. Again I comment occasionally because Lori is so passionate about helping and encouraging others to be biblically correct by taking feelings and emotions out of the situation. Ken and Lori both work tirelessly to help us. And for anyone who reads my comment let’s understand it’s all about Christ. Not you and not me. Let’s give all the honor and glory to Christ and say thank you to someone like Lori for speaking truth when the world wants to speak nonsense
Lori’s blog and Ken’s encouragement I pray are helping me become a better husband father and leader for my family.
Thank you, Rob. You are one of the men who have become a good friend of Ken’s from his mentorship to you. And it is ALL for God’s glory and He gets all the praise because we are just sharing what His Word clearly teaches.
Hi Lori, I have a sincere question..my husband wanted to apply for somethung and I reminded him to give all the information that they are asking for. My husband said he did not need to do that (rejecting what I told him) but then he finds they asked for the information that he did not bring which I mentioned to him that he should bring. Now it’s possible it might cost us the thing he applied for because of ignoring a simple reminder. May I ask how do I go about handling this because I’m quite frustrated over it. If my spouse makes a mistake the whole household will be in jeopardy. Please any advice will be helpful because I feel I can’t even mention a simple reminder to him. Yu are more experienced in marriage than i am. We may not agree on everything but when it comes to submission I listen wholeheartedly. So please any advice for this matter would be greatly appreciated. Shalom
Good post.
I am not interested in learning general doctrine on here; I come here to learn about submissive and my role as a Godly wife, and how I can be a better helpmeet for my husband. I learn about doctrine etc. at church every week.
Some of the comments from men on here definitely rub me up the wrong way, and my husband has asked to just ignore them completely because he often disagrees with them too, but mostly, I love what you teach, Lori!
You can give him one reminder but if he doesn’t do as you have asked and suffers for it, along with the family, this is how it goes. He’s the head of the home and bears the responsibility of how to run it, whether it is successful or a failure. But you are only responsible for your behavior towards so continue to be kind, forgiving, showing grace, submissive, loving, and cheerful knowing that God is ultimately in control. Hopefully, he will learn from his mistakes.
Thank you, KAK. Doctrine tends to separate people (Calvinism, Armenianism, etc.) so I like to stay away from those types of discussions since it’s not generally profitable and something that I’m not called to teach, thankfully!
Hi submissive
Your experience is similar to something I read about in the “Fascinating Womanhood” book (written by David Coory, based on Helen Andelin’s teachings). The advice given in the book was, when our husband’s make mistakes, to not show our disapproval (or if we must do so, to do it respectfully, and just once then let it go) but also step right back and let them take full responsibility for fixing it. This is the way men learn and grow.
Personally, that goes against every grain of my nature and I don’t know that I could do that … but then, applications for pretty much everything are made together in my house, so hopefully I will never have to be tested in that regard because I fear I would fail!
The advice given was to hand everything over to our husbands, completely. When debt collectors call, simply hand him the phone and let him deal with them – refuse to get involved at all – if it’s his responsibility, HE must fix it. If the whole family suffers because of something he did, he will suffer too, but let him fix it by himself. And be gracious in the suffering.
Again – I don’t know if I could do this, but it is probably very good, Godly advice, and ultimately a good thing to aim to do.
If you are interested in reading this book, a PDF version is available free on line. I can send Lori a link to it, if you would like me to.
Lori,
No. The answer is no. I don’t even need to read the post. (I shall, later, when I leave the sewing room.) Anyone can read your writings. Your writings instruct women as Titus 2 commands you to do.
Catch ya later!
*hugs*
Kelley~
Thank you Lori and Kak for your gracious responds. I will try to act in Humility regarding this matter and wait on the Lord to see how it turns out. And yes Kak please send the link. Thank you all.
Hi Lori
Like Rob, I am a married male who enjoys reading your blog. To me, your blog is a validation of how I try to live, and treat people, as a Christian, knowing I am doing my best by the Lord. Your blog also falls in line with my belief that the man is the head of household, wives should revere their husbands, and young women (young men too for that matter) need to be made aware of the perils they have been taught from things like feminism, and the public school system teachings. They are being fed a pack of lies. Thank you for your efforts in what you do.
Satan will use any and every trick, lie and deception that he can to try and stop Christians from doing what God calls us to do.
From everything that I can see, you are right where you need to be and doing exactly what God has called you to do. Your ministry is a blessing and I thank you for it.
Many thanks , Lori, for these posts. I thank the Lord for you and your sound teaching. By the way, I am an “older woman,”too, married 37 years, with 4 children. However, I am still waiting on the Lord for those grandchildren to come. In the meantime, I’ve adopted 6 of them from my younger women friends!?
Thank you, Kelley! I have NO desire to teach men.
You’re welcome, Patrick!
Thank you, Trey! I sure enjoy doing it.
You’ll love having grandchildren, Holly! It’s like having children all over again.
I don’t think there’s a specific formula for dealing with that type of situation so my answer is my opinion based of course within biblical parameters.
In situations like this, perhaps in it’s best to work as your husbands helper, like an assistant For example, offer to gather all the information he will need, knowing that he has to apply for this, say “okay, I will put everything you will need in a folder for you and gather it together if you would like”, and if he agrees do so promtly and let him know what’s in there, while also asking if there’s anything he thinks you forgot and being quick to also gather that info for him too… let him know your happy to help but if he insists he has in covered and declines the help then (without disappointment or anger) let him know if he needs anything to just let you know and let him do it as he sees fit.
This way, if it fails not only does he avoid the dreaded feeling of an “I told you so” on top of whatever stress the not being approved already brings, but he also knows he has your support, love and respect still at home waiting for him whatever the outcome, that your in this together and available to help if he needs it.
However it seems this is a situation that has already played out so now more than ever be his support, by his side with a gentle spirit, bearing no record of wrongs to him when/if it doesn’t work out and letting him know you’ve both got this! Also share in the joy if everything goes through smoothly by giving him gratitude for how he went about handling it. Sometimes we think it won’t work and stress over it and all works out in the end without any delay anyways!
But, honestly sweet heart, this is my “what I would do” and better yet a fresh cup of coffee (or tea) some tissues, a pen and a journal with an open Bible can be a far better teacher and guide that all the other women out there bc God is our source of wisdom. The Holy Spirit knows the exacts, so above all and beyond my oponions, seek Him relentlessly, especially if this situation causes a unsteady storm to brew financially or otherwise, just keep remembering the storm will pass and your husband will need your support, kindness, love and respect to keep his head up to Be able to fix the situation. Easier said than done I’m sure, but worth it! ((Hugs))
Beautiful Ginnie, thank you for your comments. I will take heed 🙂
Here is the link to the Fascinating Womanhood book. It is a PDF version. A paperback version is available, just do a Google search for it.
http://www.womensetapart.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Secrets-of-Fascinating-womanhood.pdf
KAK,
I’ve read fascinating womanhood. Some of the principles are good, some are just nonsense, but the overriding thing for me was, at the beginning of the book it refers to “the prophet”. After doing some research, I found out the author was Mormon. So I would tread carefully and compare everything to scripture.
Anon M – I didn’t notice anything about “the prophet” to be honest. The version I have is written by David Coory, based on Helen Andelin’s teachings. I wonder if that is why? You are right – Helen Andelin was a Mormon. David Coory is a Christian. It’s called “Secrets of Fascinating Womanhood”.
I kinda skim-read through it when I first got it (I was given it by a lovely Christian lady who recently passed away, when I was a very young, feminist wife) and I scoffed at most of it. I contemplated chucking it away because I didn’t want to be *that* kind of wife – I had no intention of being obedient or submissive to my husband. But gradually, as my marriage fell apart, and the lovely Christian lady who gave me the book originally, began to encourage me to be the kind of wife God wanted me to be, I re-read the book. Some of it is nonsense, that is true, but much of it is very encouraging and helpful and when I started applying it, magic happened 🙂
I just happen to come across this blog. I respect your position related to teaching women but I have this thought. I think the verses you mentioned about women not teaching men have to be interpreted in the context of the entire Bible and not just the single verse. I often wonder where so many of the lost in the the world would have heard about Jesus if there weren’t so many fearless women missionaries who went out and taught the Bible to men and women in some of the the most remote parts of the earth. Just a thought. Keep up your good work!
Hi kak, so I started reading this book and I must say it has gotten my attention. I don’t finish of course though. I will use discernment if something is out of line with the scripture though. Thanks again!?
Hi Mike,
Having grown up a missionary kid, worked for a missionary organization and had a father who directed an overseas missions, I can tell you that single women missionaries do exist, but the vast majority of these women are in support positions of being school teachers, nurses and women’s ministries. There are some who took up the torch of evangelism with success, and the Bible is not opposed to women sharing the gospel at home or overseas.
Very few missionary women, if any, led churches or were leaders in a church. Very few had roles of teaching men or were in authority over them in the church. I would be interested in your research that shows “of many fearless women missionaries who went out and taught the Bible to men and women in some of the the most remote parts of the earth.” I am not saying some did not exist, but the number compared to their male counterparts “as related to the church and seminary work” was but a small fraction. Perhaps the same 2% fraction that can be found in the Bible illustrations for the women in ministry, yet all of those ministries were either evangelism or support ministries, not teaching, preaching or leading the church. As it turns out… many is not very many as it relates to the Biblical admonition to not teach or or be in authority in the church, precisely because these women believed the Word and followed it… and had valuable ministries within God’s order of things.
As a man I’m not here to be educated, but to rest and rejoice with the truth. You are very special in a very good way. Where I’m coming from feminism is so prevalent that I would rather go to hell already, but in here I find that I’m not all alone after all and I needed that.
I could teach these things and much more, but unfortunately women wouldn’t want to hear it from me. Keep teaching women.