How Has Women Leaving Their Homes Hurt Culture?
Many women despise my teachings on women being keepers at home. They will often give me names of all the great and powerful women who left their homes and did good things in order to back up their defense that women don’t need to be keepers at home. They will tell me that I am shaming women for teaching these things. They confuse shaming with conviction. God’s Word convicts them. If they feel shame, they are really feeling conviction. If they are doing what they know is right, no one would be able to shame them.
How has women leaving their homes hurt culture? It has hurt culture in many, many ways. Children are no longer being raised by their own mothers. They are being raised by daycare workers and teachers. “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame” (Proverbs 29:15). Children need a lot of teaching, training, and discipline. They aren’t receiving this if their mothers are away from them most of the day. These mothers are giving their best to others instead of to their children. These children are bringing shame to their mothers as they grow up. We are told this in God’s Word. All of the people we see rioting and burning down buildings were most likely not raised by a mother full time.
Women leaving their homes have hurt marriage. Women now initiate divorce 70 percent of the time since they no longer need to depend upon their husbands but can instead take half of what he owns and have them pay child support for many years. They are often too tired to put much time or energy into their marriages due to their careers. Marriage and raising children is FAR more important than having a career. There is nothing more important than raising the next generation, and children need a mother and father under the same roof and involved in their lives.
Women leaving their homes has hurt the old people. Old people no longer have their daughters around to help and give them comfort because their daughters are pursuing their careers. Young mothers hurt because they no longer have their mothers help because they have careers and they don’t have any older women involved in their lives due to careers. Neighbors don’t have people they can call on when they need help when all of the women are working away from their homes.
Women are more depressed and suicidal than ever before. They can’t expect anything different when they leave the clear path that God has chosen for them to pursue their own paths. God is our Creator and He is good. His ways for us are good. Women have been affected negatively since leaving their homes. Children have been abandoned and have been hurt the most. When the least among us is hurt the most, then we must carefully examine the path that we are on and switch course.
God-fearing women, I encourage you to go back to the paths that the Lord has laid out for you. If you think you can’t afford it, step out in faith in Almighty God. He tells us that His commands are not burdensome and that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. He wants you home full time. This is where He has given you to work and minister. Your work at home is not worthless! God will use you in powerful ways as you obey Him. He will bless you abundantly and the older you get, the more you will realize this.
Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls. But they said, We will not walk therein.
Jeremiah 6:16
26 thoughts on “How Has Women Leaving Their Homes Hurt Culture?”
Totally agree! Especially the part about this hurting the elderly!
We think of the children, and we should, but one of the ways we women can serve the Lord is to also take care of our parents, and particularly widows within our family (from 1 Timothy 5). When we’re working full-time, this is virtually impossible, at least without becoming overwhelmed and frazzled by the amount to do with so little time.
Oh, that we would ask for and follow the old paths! Amen!
Yes and since so many aren’t “guarding” the home as scripture translates to, many bad people, things and ideas are creeping in. Children are being molested at high rates, television is exposing kids to unprofitable shows and wisdom is not being passed on.
This is a wonderful post. Thank you for pointing out our care and responsibilities to elderly parents. My dad turns 95 soon, but he is still able to live independently in an apartment. Well, on second thought, not as independently as he would like. Recently, I brought meals to him daily for nearly 2 weeks while he was recovering from an illness. He often comes to our house for dinner as well. I clean his apartment, and I assist in running errands for him. All of this would not be possible if I had a job or career. I see God’s wisdom in women being keepers at home— guarding and guiding the affairs of the home and all of life’s journey from cradle to the grave.
Beautiful!
Amen, Holly!! Keep up the great service to our Lord as your serve others. What a role we have in the home—one that extends blessings to many others!
I would add that women leaving their homes each day in droves has harmed culture by providing the wrong role models for future women and marriages. It becomes a vicious downward spiral until you reach a point where marriage and children are no longer valued as they are put on the altars of success, money and careers.
The Church too is part of this awful trend of society’s downward spiral to the break up of the family. But worst of all so many souls are lost in the to the Church from Christian families whose children are walking away from the Lord.
Sure, we can blame the colleges and the brainwashing Christian kids receive when they leave home, but the only reason the colleges can touch them is that these children never were instilled the truth in a soul-saving way prior to leaving home. They had no Mom at home teaching and singing to them the old Christian hymns; no modeling of God’s ways in marriage between Mom and Dad; and a violation of God’s Word as He commands us to teach our children God’s statutes and ways in a full-time manner, not to be left for the unbelievers to raise them:
“And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up” (Deut. 6:6-7).
I am not one who believes that every Christian woman can stay home with her children as life and circumstances too often pull us from God’s ideals, but I do believe that the vast majority of Christian women can be home for major chucks of their child’s life, and that this should be every home’s priority.
If you can’t be at home with your children work towards that end, and make extra investments in the time you do have with them, the way your marriage looks and acts before them, and in who is spending hours a day with them. God can save the children of working Moms, but we cannot expect that a whole generation of Christian women can walk away from God’s Word and expect that God will be blessing them. It just doesn’t work that way. God blesses those who love and obey Him, and for those, there is great grace and forgiveness for the times we fail Him at HIs Word and ideals.
I am disturbed at the number of women having children outside of marriage, often with multiple fathers who do not remain in the children’s lives. This is a guarantee that she will have to leave her children in the care of others.
A motherless home is indeed a problem, but absent fathers are very problematic as well. Ladies, if he won’t put a ring on your finger, then move. on. Don’t sentence yourself and your children to a lifetime of poverty and institutional care.
Front yards. It’s hurt front yards.
You can always identify a house with a stay at home mother because the front yard is beautiful. And come holiday time, tons of decorations.
Amen!!!
I care for my father as well. He’s only 70 but he is dying of heart failure and is not able to do as much as he would like. It is an honour and a privilege to be able to care for him, and I wouldn’t be able to do it if I worked full-time – it’s hard enough with working part-time! It is good for my children to see, too. But it’s also terribly hard, emotionally. He’s not dead yet, but already I am grieving, watching him suffer and deteriorate.
Women who are unable to care for their elderly parents are missing out on so much.
Well said. This made me laugh. I seriously laughed out loud and my husband looked at me sideways! I only laughed because it resonated with me! I love to decorate the front of our home with seasonal decor. Including fresh flowers in spring and summer. I honestly wouldn’t have the time if I was focused on a 9-5 type job.
It is amazing how God takes care of you, I’ve been a stay at home for the last 11 years with the exception of working outside the home part-time evenings and weekends for 3 months last year! I quit because it was taking too much from us and I was determined to never try that again. I’ve also homeschooled for the last 4 years. Since then, God has given my husband a significant raise and us our first house! Have we lived in an apartment for 11 years with 3 kids? Half just a small 2 bedroom. Yes. It is very hard to live on one income but God has made a way for our family and we are so blessed! I don’t think some parents realize just how much discipling and teaching needs to happen and often hand over their children to church Sunday school and government schools. My daughter at the of age 11 has many spiritual and cultural questions; we feel so blessed to be the ones to pour truth into her.
Lori, do you have any suggestions for how women can help/support widows in their family who have no sons or men to help them?
I helped my mom care for my dad before he died. I know it’s hard. You can do this, by the grace of God. I pray He gives you supernatural strength. God bless.
If you feel you need to work or need the “outlet” and your husband has given his stamp of approval- there are options for you at home with your children. Think writing for magazines, Tupperware, Norwex , etc. or even vegetable or flower market gardening in season. You can work before the children get up or after they are in bed or during nap time. If you choose to work at your “Proverbs 31 project” during the day and you don’t have nappers have a tote box of quiet toys, books, and simple crafts that they may have only when you’re working. Preferably they are in the same room as you.
This can’t be stressed enough. When I was working in juvenile probation, I had contact with many parents….MOTHERS. In my two years in juvies, I met exactly one father. Most homes had none. In the case of the boy whose father I met, I didn’t feel the boy should’ve been there. He clearly knew right from wrong, was polite, well spoken, etc. He did something dumb and he knew it. The judge was making an example out of him.
Every other child I had was being raised by a single, working mom and Dad was uninvolved.
If I had gone on to grad school, I already knew that my thesis was going to be something to the effect of, “Absence of Fathers and its Effect on Crime.” And this was back in the mid 80s. It’s way worse now.
I would add to this all the organizing of social/community functions that women have less time for now.
Compared with our forebears, we have a paucity of social associations and community events.
All women belong at home raising the children and taking care of the home. Feminism is evil. There’s absolutely no reason for a couple to have the wife work out of the home. Let the men be men. I never worked and I never thought that I was lacking anything.
Hi Jessica! So happy for you and your family, congrats on getting your first home! If we trust in God, follow his plan and obey and lift up our husbands to lead our families, we will be blessed! My 3 children are all young adults on their own now, I homeschooled most all of the time and have never worked a day in my life (I’m 43 now), and never will – not even part time. I keep house, serve and obey my husband, and enjoy the free time I have now (nothing wrong with that!!!) God’s plan is for us to be at home where we belong!! Hang in there!!!
Hi Can someone keep me in prayer I work part- time as a caregiver and the job has stressed me out I come home most times tired because I am lifting my client who has Alzheimers and Parkinson’s disease…. my husband gets on me because me about our children’s education because now since my 2 older sons are at home they have online classes by their teachers that they have to do. I am committed though to help them with school work and also teach my 3 boys about the Bible which I need to give more time to more often the Lord Knows this but can u all please keep me in prayer that I can stay home and pray for my husband that he can either keep or apply for something else? Thank u Tranaformed Wife for your Godly Wisdom. One other ministry I know based in Texas referred us to check u out online about Biblical womanhood and what great teachings u have based solely on God’s Word.
I’m not Lori but we have a number of widows in our meeting. Each woman is at different levels in the grieving process and have differing levels of independence, but across the board I think they are lonely. Maybe you could reach out to her in friendship first of all, and from there, find out what her needs are. Does she need a ride to Dr appts or grocery shopping? Does she have household or yard chores that are too much for her? Maybe send a card saying you’re thinking of her or drop a phone call. Bringing her a meal or a bouquet of flowers might be appreciated.
Just a few thoughts. Hope it helps?
Would you say working mostly from home as well as cooking, cleaning, keeping the house nice, etc, is acceptable? (In greater detail, the work being as a full time artist and occasional thespian and the artist being married but not having children)
May the Lord heal your dads heart. In Jesus Christ name
Hi Lori!
I can testify to this post. I have been a homemaker for 15 years. I foolishly left home to work in a day care part time. I caved to family members who suggested I do “more” now that my children are in school all day. This was 5 days a week from 9 am to 12:30 pm. This lasted from October to March. I became run down and physically ill. The mothers would drop their children off ill because they had to go to their jobs. I worked very hard to clean the rooms and engage with the children. These poor children! They had runny noses, coughs, mild fevers… How they cried! And I picked up every illness myself. I would come home and shower then fall asleep till it was time to pick my children up from school. My home suffered terribly. I was exhausted. I was always running ragged trying to catch up at home. When the pandemic came the daycare was closed and I resigned. Never again will I leave my home for a job. If younger women would just be willing to do with less! Be content! Up cycle items -be creative -stay off of media and Amazon and the like! They will not need jobs to justify the buy and spend culture we are in. That is my testimony. Stay home raise your children. This doesn’t mean you say my child is in middle or high school so now I can work. They are still children till they turn 18. When kids are teens it doesn’t mean you go off and get a job. Trust me! The mothering isn’t over it’s different! Just because your kids are in school all day doesn’t mean it’s a green light to run off and leave your home. Teens actually need you more than ever. Trust me ladies! Please!
Phenomenal little post! Thank u!
Women who work do not have time for Titus 2 ministry which they are called to by God, nor do they have time for the ministry of hospitality. Huge negatives!
All the working women I know are constantly exhausted and stressed, always under pressure from their demanding bosses. These women cry and are stressed, but still cling to this willful torture!