Raise Your Daughters Right
Written By K.B. Davis
Society is awash with talk of fathers raising their boys and sons right – teaching them how to treat women, work hard, be a provider, cook, clean, and tidy up after themselves.
Quite right and all well and good.
But I do not hear the equivalent for girls. So, who teaches women? I do not hear anything about raising daughters right, or teaching them to be clean, tidy, cook, and keep a home.
I do not hear about teaching girls to respect men, or to submit and obey their husbands. I don’t hear about teaching them to dress modestly, to be meek, chaste and humble.
I do not hear about teaching them not to be man-hating, victim-mentality feminists who have swallowed the lie of the world wholesale.
I don’t hear anything about teaching them to love themselves the way they are, rather than “toning” their skins and yearning to wear make up and lace wigs when they grow up.
Because right now, society is full of girls AND women who are more of the latter, and less of the former things mentioned above.
Some are downright lazy, extremely untidy, and can’t cook to save their lives. They have no idea what a “man” is, talk less of how to treat him. They have grown up with a sense of entitlement thinking a man is someone of the male gender who exists to please them and pander to their whims.
Some call themselves “slay queens “ or “slay mamas,” and their major skill seems to be taking selfies, dancing, twerking, and posting half naked pictures on Instagram; subliminally begging for attention. All they know is how to dress sexy, look good, and wear makeup.
Others fight and cuss each other out on social media, or spew out sexually explicit stuff without any decorum or modicum of self respect. Furthermore, women are now competing with men in the violence stakes – in regards to things like domestic violence and violent crimes in society.
So, who “raised” these girls and women? Ghosts?
The Bible says to “train up a CHILD in the right way, so when they are older, they will not depart from it”- Proverbs 22:6. It didn’t say to train up just boys and sons.
But more importantly, it tells the older women to TEACH the younger ones to be “humble, chaste, be homemakers, to love their husbands and be obedient to him”; among other things – Titus 2:3-5.
This is not opinion. It is Scripture.
Parents, raise your DAUGHTERS right. Mothers, raise your DAUGHTERS right. Not just your sons.
19 thoughts on “Raise Your Daughters Right”
Oh, so true. Thanks for this post!
YES!!! A great post!! 🙂 Thanks for sharing it! I totally agree! 🙂
It is so true!!! Lori, you’re truly the light and salt! Unfortunately, some of us weren’t raised the right way.. And it is extremely difficult to change this.. But with God’s help I can all.
So very true! My daughter has been asking me when I will teach her to be a mama. It is something I thought was just caught (or not). It really got me to be intentional about it, especially because I lack basic skills and discipline myself. I had already planned for a list of books she will have as required reading for school that are about Godly womanhood for when she gets a bit older.
But I have decided I should be even more intentional now. I ordered an online cooking class for kids and my children love it and beg for cooking class each week. This is great because I never learned to cook well or enjoy the process. I’m really hoping they will learn to enjoy cooking.
I also got a kids cleaning DVD and flip chart. I actually keep a tidy home but I realized I wasn’t passing that down to my kids. I like to clean and often do it when I happen to be in a room that needs cleaning (ie. I will clean the bathroom right after using it in the morning) so my kids weren’t getting a lot of practice doing it on their own. I mean they always had to clean up after themselves with toys but not household chores. They both now enjoy it and do an adequate job.
But I am trying to find a way to teach my daughter manners, etiquette and decorum in a fun (and cheap) way. I really think it is a lost art. I’d love for my daughter to learn now what I’m still learning. I don’t mean just the surface, easy things like which fork to use but how to have a quiet, feminine demeanor even if you are naturally extremely outgoing without an inborn sense of modesty like both of us are.
Have tea parties. Have your daughters set the table/decorate. Bake/plan the treats, make the tea. Practice manners at the table.
So much fun! And very educational at the same time
Thanks, Lori! How is your mother? I hope she is well. Your mother is blessed to have a daughter like you who is raised right. You are also blessed to be a mother to daughters who follow God’s Word. Thank you!
Hi there Lori, can I ask what is a“slay queens “ or “slay mamas,” I have never heard it before!
Thank you,
Jilly ? ? ? ? ?
Hi Jilly!
After doing a quick Google search, it basically means a woman believes herself to be so beautiful and seductive she ‘slays’ peoples eyes. Sounds rather pathetic really.
I think this is another example of what happens when moms are away at work. My mom wasn’t around to teach me so I probably learned what I did from watching tv. But, there’s a BIG difference in my watching Disney and The Brady Bunch vs. the garbage like Married with Children and what followed. The lesson of today is that you have sex by the third date. Egads.
Oh, and that all father s are to be mocked because they are so stupid.
WONDERFUL idea! We do have tea parties from time to time but I lay everything out and all the goodies are store bought. They would positively love to do prepare everything and learn about manners in that context. Perhaps I can even find some of the 1940s YouTube videos to watch with them on manners and comportment.
In regards to materials to help in training and teaching our daughters, there are so many good ones I will share a few:
Training Our Daughters to be Keepers at Home (aka TODKAH); Pearables Lessons in Responsibility for girls and another for boys too and their other materials also; A Girl’s Guide to Home Skills; Keepers of the Faith; A Girl of Beauty; All Doorposts materials; Etc.
Some books/magazines:
King’s Blooming Rose magazine, The Family Daughter, Beautiful Girlhood, The Girlhood Home Companion Treasury, God’s Wisdom for Little Girls, When I’m a Mommy, A Little Book of Manners, Let’s Have a Tea Party, Making My Room Special, etc.
And a blog:
Raising Homemakers .com
I hope this is helpful to someone!
You know, something else I just thought of… The enemy wants to keep us busy even if it’s doing good things, such as helping in the church, etc. But our time with our daughters is so short and of utmost importance. There is a season for everything, as the Word says. Even Proverbs 31 Woman was not doing all that is described of her at once, that was over a life time. There will come a time when we will just have time for other things, and will be even required to do that which some seem to want to do while they have children at home still (I’m thinking of blogs where they teach other women but they aren’t older women yet and have no pudding as” proof”). In addition to TTW, I recommend a book that is out of print, by Susan Zakula, Are You Serious About Marriage? and another of hers A Little of This a Little of That. I go back to those a lot! We need to be reminded and taught much.
Thank you! I’m off to check these out.
Great article! So true! Love all of the recommendations. I am reading Beautiful Girlhood with my daughters and we are loving it.
I agree! Anything that pulls us away from our husbands and children and their needs is a red flag, in my opinion. Ever notice how most of these activities occur right during the dinner hour? When most mothers were home, activities used to occur right after school. Now, almost all of them start around 6 and last well into the evening. No wonder we are all exhausted. This is something that I am really struggling with, because the world tells us that we should be busy and active. But my heart is in the home. So I am starting to say no to these evening activities, even when it is something that I really want to attend. I’d love to get your thoughts on this, Lori!
Debby, the mocking of fathers makes me crazy. It is so destructive and so wrong. We don’t watch a lot of TV anyway, but we especially will not watch programs that mock the father figure.
What an amazing post! I’ve been yearning to hear a message like this and you put it across so effectively. Thank you and may God bless your work!
I think that girls from the time they are babies are subluminal taught about being a mother. Parents buy their daughters dolls and little girls pretend to raise them. Mothers teach their daughters how to cook. I have meet girls who don’t know how to cook but I have meet more boys who can’t cook.