Staying Home is Too Hard For Her

Staying Home is Too Hard For Her

Last summer, a popular female preacher asked if we could have a live debate online. Her views are pretty much opposite of mine. Just the fact that she is a female preacher tells me a lot about her. I declined. I am not gifted as a public speaker and debating her isn’t something that I wanted to do. Many write me and tell me how upset they are with me because I don’t want to argue my position with them on my Facebook page and allow their disagreeable comments. It’s not my goal to argue my position and beliefs with others. My goal is to teach what God has commanded that I teach – biblical womanhood.

I was interviewed by a woman from USA Today last week. Here is the article for those of you who don’t follow me on social media. Shari, who interviewed me, honestly portrayed what I teach and didn’t twist any of my words to mean something I didn’t say. I was very thankful to see this since most articles on social media written about me are extremely negative towards what I write and even mock me which is to be expected. She was actually unbiased and fair!

My flow chart was talked about on Good Morning America last week as well. The woman who was complaining about it made these comments: “I’m not as good about staying home. I know that about myself…It’s too hard for me. It is not my natural self. So when I’m working all day, I get natural feedback. I know I’m good at something.” The sad part of what she had to say was what she didn’t say. She didn’t say anything about what was best for her children. It was only what was best for her.

If she wants to work, this is her freedom to do so, as well as all women who work away from the home. I am not trying to take away this freedom or any freedoms from women. I am simply teaching what God’s Word has to say to young women about this and His ways are “good, and acceptable, and perfect” (Romans 12:2) and what I know to be best for marriages and children.

What if a woman doesn’t feel like she’s a good keeper at home? What if it is too hard for her and she doesn’t feel like her “natural self”? What about the lack of praise when staying home full time? All of these are good questions and one can understand why many women prefer to work outside of their homes rather than be home with their children full time.

However, if you are a believer in Jesus Christ, it doesn’t matter how you “feel” about things. This life on earth doesn’t depend upon our feelings, what we like, or trying to be our “natural self.” Our desire is to obey God regardless of the cost, feelings, sacrifice, or anything else. Once you truly understand that God’s ways are best, it will be what you want to pursue the most even if it’s the hardest thing to do. You may not receive praise from coworkers or your boss, but you will receive praise from the One who matters the most – Jesus Christ the Lord.

One day all of us will die. Do you know where you will spend eternity? I do! I am going to spend it with my Savior and all those who loved and believed in Him. I never began this blog to receive the praise of men. Yes, I do receive a lot and I am thankful for it but I receive a lot of hate for what I write, too, but this doesn’t concern me. All I truly care about is on the day that I die, Jesus Christ will say to me, “Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy Lord” (Matthew 25:23). This is all that matters when it’s all said and done.

Be prepared to receive backlash whenever you speak the truth of God’s Word. God has promised us this! It should not scare or frighten us because greater is He who is in us than he who is in the world. Some people are hungry for truth and light. Jesus is the light of the world! Be bold in your faith and in your walk in the Spirit. He will never leave nor forsake you. He has given us so many precious promises. Cling to them and to Him! He is a promise keeper.

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.
Psalm 119:105

19 thoughts on “Staying Home is Too Hard For Her

  1. I feel the same way too when I write! People will criticize and twist what you have to say, but I honestly see you as a role model in how to handle that with elegance and grace: Just keep on doing what you’re doing and ignore the haters. Don’t change what you write for them, or even get into it… The truth hurts often times, people want to do what feels good rather than what does good! It takes a brave person to say “no!” and speak the cold hard truth of the world!

    1. Someone wrote my husband and me a while back and told us that we don’t have to defend ourselves against Satan’s agents. In fact, we are told to avoid those who cause fractions and divisions so this is what I try to do. Keep my face forward towards the goal – pleasing God and bringing glory to Him!

      “Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.” (Romans 16:17)

  2. Amen. So many nasty women “judging” you for “judging” others. I don’t know why they bother to read your articles unless they find something true in what you are saying. I don’t follow blogs I disagree with and I sure don’t bother to comment on them. These women have too much time on their hands.

    1. It’s hard to understand, M. I don’t read those blogs that I disagree with, either, and I have no desire to tear them apart verbally but we are promised in His Word that if they hated Him (Christ), they will hate us, too.

  3. I found it so interesting that this woman said staying home with her children is not her natural self. She’s totally right. It’s not our natural self to sacrificially give of ourselves or obey God’s word. The Bible tells us this.

    1 Corinthians 2:14  But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. 

    Romans 8:7-8  Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be. So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God. 

    This is why it is considered so unreasonable and foolish for a woman to stay home. The worldly way of thinking is contrary to the commands of God. The world says to do what comes naturally to us. God’s word says that our natural self is corrupted by sin and wants the wrong things. We should obey God’s word, not our own desires.

    1. Exactly, and this is the reason why God commands that older women teach the young women to be keepers at home. It won’t be most young women’s natural inclination to want to be home full time raising their own children.

  4. I want to start by saying I had never read this blog up until yesterday…
    Sometimes I have to remind myself that I was once the same as this world. However I really think that even the women who dont agree or even go as far as threaten you, are reading the truth. Ive been both working and stay at home and I dont necessarily believe that staying home is easier or that I personally am less exhausted at the end of the day.. I do belive that many many seeds are being planted just from reading this. It might not make sence to the masses and you can deny the truth all day long, but that doesnt mean it won’t stick inside that person waiting to grow.

  5. Indeed, it is not natural to deny ourselves and live in a self-sacrificial manner. I don’t always feel like it, but that doesn’t matter. There is such a joy in loving God’s ways and wanting to live them out; the power to do such comes from the Holy Spirit, and not my own flesh. I strive after God’s will because He has converted and changed me.

  6. Internet argument is often unproductive because it wanders down rabbit holes, may devolve into insults, and rarely produces worthwhile threads.

    However, I think there is a place for the debate of opposing ideas, though I can appreciate that this is not the purpose of your blog. Probably the best discussion about abortion I participated in was on a site in which nearly all of the commenters were pro-choice and regarded pro-lifers as trying to punish women for having sex, clinging to morally repugnant religion, etc. I had commented on the site many times upon topics wherein the other commenters and I agreed, and so our discussion was conducted as carefully and respectfully as could occur when something as provoking as abortion is involved.

    All this is to say that I hope people who disagree with your words will express themselves in a respectful, thought-provoking manner that adds value to the blog. You are our host, of course, and so we are guests on your blog and should behave considerately as guests would.

  7. Dearest Lori,
    I am so very confused by everything you are teaching. I am not resistant to it, but it flies against everything I have been taught. If you would ever be able to talk I would so much appreciate it. I was taught just serve others, remain pure, and work hard, and God will bring you a spouse. That didn’t happen and I have been actively looking for about five years, and it still has not happened. I have been crying out to God for help and guidance. I am not sure yet if what you are teaching is true or false which is why I am reaching out to talk to you. May the Lord bless you and keep you,
    In Him <3
    Kelly

  8. I think this was given to me by God today. I have been struggling with no longer working and feeling so lost by being at home. I know that I am fortunate to be able to be home and do the things I enjoy but now it seems I am useless. Thank you for writing and I look forward to reading more.

  9. Be prepared to receive backlash whenever you speak the truth of God’s Word. God has promised us this!

    What’s so disheartening is how often it is those who call themselves your fellow Christians from whom this backlash and resistence comes.

  10. Sometimes, it’s our stinkin’ thinkin’ that makes our work seem harder. For instance, I despise hand washing dishes. But rather than dwell on it, I create an atmosphere that helps me to enjoy it. Such as lighting a scented candle, listening to a good sermon or using a lovely scented dish soap. It makes the process more pleasant. If you find you don’t like staying at home and feel bored, rather than complain about it, find simple frugal ways to make it enjoyable. Reward yourself or set little challenges and make it fun. It will make the task seem so much more pleasant.

  11. The thing is people think we stay at home cooking and cleaning ALL day and that simply isn’t the case. And if one is truly bored with their children at home, how about going to a museum or the zoo. Don’t forget the park is a good place to run around with your children. Ask your child to push YOU on the swing if they are big enough. Go down the slide with them and who cares if people think you are strange!

    If you have game system at home play a game with your children. You’re older ones might think you’ve lost your mind or they will have to explain for the hundred time that you have to push the little blue button to get the golf ball in the hole.

    Being a keeper at home is a blessing. Why let someone else enjoy your children why you work? Why let someone else see your baby walk for the first time? Can you imagine how awful it is to miss that?

    1. I hear that some daycare providers don’t tell the parents when their kids take their first step, say their first word, etc so that the parents don’t feel bad about missing these milestones.

  12. There are women with many different talents and interests. My issue is that feminism has made it nearly impossible for me to be a woman at home! I’m fine with female teachers and doctors, but let me be a woman at home! That’s where I thrive!

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