When Women Didn’t Leave Their Kitchens

When Women Didn’t Leave Their Kitchens

This is a fake advertisement for Hardees made to mock the gender roles of the past. It states, “Women don’t leave the kitchen! We all know a woman’s place is in the home, cooking a man a delicious meal. But if you are still enjoying the bachelor’s life and don’t have a little miss waiting on you, then come down to Hardee’s for something sloppy and hastily prepared.”

God tells us a woman’s place is in the home. It’s the best place for us to be! We have been called to be our husband’s help meet and a keeper at home, therefore, we are responsible for fixing them food and taking care of them. Yes, we are to serve them. Many, even Christian women, hate this concept but they will leave their homes all day and serve a boss and/or their clients willingly and happily. What’s up with this? Why is it so easy for them to serve everyone but their husbands whom they have chosen to love all of their days? One reason – rebellion.

God commands wives to submit to and obey their husbands. He doesn’t command them to submit to and obey their bosses but this is what many choose to do. They submit to and obey their bosses’ wishes all day long but refuse to come home and serve and submit to their husbands. They want to be boss. They want to control their husbands. They want their way. (I know. I used to be this way.) It’s that simple but God tells us something entirely different.

He tells us that the greatest of all is the servant of all. I can tell you, women, from experience that the more I have learned to serve my husband and not expect to be served, the better our marriage has become. It’s so easy to take our husbands for granted and think they will always stay with us since they put a ring on our finger and made a vow to God, whereas a boss can fire us whenever he wants, so we seem to have more incentive to please our bosses rather than our husbands but God wants us pleasing our husbands. Our husbands are the only man that God has commanded that we submit to!

If you can submit to and serve your boss, you can submit to and serve your husband. It’s a matter of attitude and changing your stinking thinking. Your husband is who you are one flesh with. He is head over you as God has ordained. You will understand all of this as you grow older, have raised children together, and see the importance and beauty of the marriage bond and God’s will in it. It is good.

For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.
Ephesians 5:23

44 thoughts on “When Women Didn’t Leave Their Kitchens

  1. Amen, do people even recite Ephesians 5 at weddings anymore? God’s order of the family is so crucial. If people only realized what marriage represented and how it should be put first before everything besides Jesus of course.

  2. Wow! Talk about a politically incorrect ad! I love it when you post these! 🙂 If someone dared them to have an ad like that today, they’d been too scared to do so.

    And sadly, you’re right that many professing Christian women would take umbrage at it.

    Our Lord washed the feet of His disciples to set an example for us {John 13}. We are not “too good” to be keepers at home and to wait on and serve our husbands. It’s a humbling experience and a blessing, much better than serving a boss on a job, who as you said, can fire us and not even look back.

    We’re one flesh with our husbands. When we’re on our deathbed, it won’t be a boss, money, or co-workers surrounding and comforting us; it’s family.

  3. I’ll tell you, when I’ve been up until 1:00 in the morning putting a water pump in my van so I can drive it to work at 5:00 in the morning, only to come home around 8:00 the next night so I can do it all again the next day, one thing makes it worthwhile: a loving wife and kids. If I had to come home to complaints that I didn’t pick up enough dirty laundry or that she did one more load of dishes than I did when I hadn’t had a day off in over three weeks, I’d throw in the towel. Feminism ruins women by making them unfit to sacrifice for. Keep up the good work!

  4. That ad is fake, Lori and you fell for it. Hardees didn’t come into being until 1960, and if you do a little homework, you will see that that’s the modern logo, created after the merger with Carl Jr’s. The ad is mocking your world view, Lori. You’ve been conned.

  5. Thanks, Lori, for another great, encouraging post! It is a humbling thing to be known as a homemaker ; a quiet, private place where we serve our husband and family. Ultimately, we know we are serving Christ and laying up treasure in heaven. It takes courage to go against the culture of our day and be and do what God’s Word clearly teaches us. The godly wives, women, and mothers who are keepers at home are my heroes!?

  6. Men are not children. They can serve themselves just as easily as women. I submit to no one except God. I’m not a servant to a man, especially when I work just as hard as he does. Men, cook your own meals. You’re grownups. Act like it!

  7. I figured this out, Julia, and changed the beginning of the post to tell the readers that this ad was fake and intended to mock the gender roles. Women used to love and care for their husband and children. Now, feminism has taught them to neglect their husband and children and only care about themselves and what they want. I want to live my life by biblical principles since I know that God’s ways are perfect!

  8. God commands that you submit to, obey, and please your husband if you are married, Wendy, therefore, if you truly submit to God, you will willingly and cheerfully submit to your husband! He calls you to be the keeper at home and look well to the ways of your household. The least you can do for a husband who works hard to provide is to keep the home clean and tidy and make good meals for him.

  9. Are we sure this add is really – what company would admit to their food been sloppy and hastily prepared? I am a tad confused by that!???

  10. Kevin…yes they do!

    When my husband and I married 3 years ago we purposefully and intentionally
    had the minister read this verse!

  11. It’s a fake advertisement, Jilly, intended to mock the gender roles of the past. I stated this in the post. They mock wives who want to care for their husbands and children. It’s a sad culture that we live in.

  12. Talk about intense rebellion.

    Thank God that Jesus didn’t say such things about us! Wash the Apostles feet? Nah. “I submit to no one except God”…and there it is. So then what does God say?

    “Go to the Cross and submit to Rome and Death for the salvation of Men” -> “Nah, I think I’m just gonna save myself like they told me and do my own thing. But I still love you God!”

    If one loves God, they will keep His commandments. Yes, grownups, who act like it, so they put the childish things away now that they are no longer a child and instead focus on loving God and loving one another as Christ loved us.

  13. While I don’t agree with Wendy’s comment, it’s an argument I’ve heard often although I can’t personally relate. In many families, both husband and wife work full time. Husbands expect their wives to bring in half of the income in addition to tending to the home, while men simply supply the other half of the income and leave child rearing, cooking, and other household tasks and planning up to women. It’s impossible to do both. Modern women are exhausted. God’s ways are best!

  14. Lori, you don’t have to post this here. I want to extended my sympathies. I haven’t visited your blog in 2 weeks. I just read the posts about your husband, Ken. The grace and glory of God is powerful. Praise be to Him for Ken’s recovery. I’m offering prayers for his continued healing!

  15. Women have made their own bed by leaving their roles as keepers at home and now they expect their husbands to help them at home since they are no longer home that often.

  16. And these same women will bend over backwards to please their bosses – I don’t understand this Lori, as you know I adore my Precious Antony I would never want to put my loyalty to any other! We are not rich in money however we are so rich in love and family.

    I spent the day today with my Precious pregnant Johanna to day buying things for Madelyn; that to me is the greatest prosperity in the world! I still can’t believe I am going to be a grandma’s – God is so good! How is your daughter doing??????

  17. So true about how women will serve their boss and devote themselves to a company that doesn’t care about them yet will neglect their husband and children. Its so sad to hear my friends denounce motherhood. They’ll never know what they missed out on. It’s so difficult to be a women who wants to be a keeper of the home as the legacy of feminism has left few men who appreciate the work that goes into being a wife and mother. Modern men view women who want to raise children as lazy and gold-diggers.

  18. I LOVE vintage ads and although this ad isn’t genuine there are a lot of positive messages conveyed. The wife is portrayed as attractive. Her figure is lovely and she appears to be wearing an apron, suggesting she’s been working in the kitchen. The father and daughter appear to be having a happy reunion outside the window. He is dressed in a suit and tie suggesting he is returning from work. The kitchen looks clean and charming with flowers on the windowsill and cute curtains. The graphic speaks to our aspirations – love, acceptance, caring, and being cared for in return, and having a nice home where you feel welcome.

    The text, meant to be sarcastic, is quite true. Without a wife in the kitchen preparing the family’s meals many do turn to some “sloppy and hastily prepared” fast food that comes in a paper bag or a greasy box. There really is something that says “I love you” or “I value you” to a person’s soul by having a homecooked meal prepared for them. It also greatly increases children’s sense of security when meals are served regularly in the home. Family mealtime is so important, we should work hard to keep that practice alive.

  19. It’s also a common expectation of modern husbands to want their wives to work full time. Such is the case with a friend of mine who’d much rather be home with her two young sons.

    Some women don’t WANT to work but respect their husband’s wishes.

  20. We ladies really need to be careful about this need to consult our emotions and feelings. I didn’t marry until I was in my early 30s so I worked in different office settings for quite a while. My job descriptions varied, but basically I worked as an administrative assistant with a list of tasks and responsibilities that had to be completed every day. i never asked myself how I felt about setting up a conference call or serving coffee for a breakfast meeting. I did it because it was my job. Sometimes i was graciously thanked; sometimes I wasn’t. It had no effect on me; I did my job well and took pride in it. We can do this in our homes. No where in the Bible are we commanded to feel happy every minute of the day or feel happy before picking up the dirty clothes or washing the dishes. In the long run I think we would be much more content if we would just go after those daily tasks like the job they are and not worry about how we feeeeeeel about it all.

  21. We had it in our wedding vows as well and also had honor and OBEY in my vows to my husband. We even had in our wedding announcement in our local newspaper, in the part that includes where it tells where you plan to live and your occupations, it read “Summer plans to be a lifelong housewife and never plans to enter the workforce.” My dad actually wrote that for the paper (my husband works for my dad)!

  22. I wish the ad weren’t fake! I love it (except the part about the Hardees food being sloppy and hastily prepared). I would love a poster of it in my house. I am proud to be the wife/mom wearing the apron, except I could never be in heels like that, I’m ALWAYS in bare feet!!!!

  23. We did it! We did it specifically after reading this blog!

    Oh, some people have some real issues…the uncle who we asked to read it, his wife came to our house and demanded an explanation.

  24. I have a problem with you calling husbands bosses. ”
    A boss manages their employees, while a leader inspires them to innovate, think creatively, and strive for perfection. Every team has a boss, but what people need is a leader who will help them achieve greatness. Not sure how to tell the difference between the two? follow the link below ”
    Husbands are to simulate Christ and his love for the Church .
    Ephesians 5:22-33
    ”Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

    25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”[b] 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
    From this context Paul is telling husbands to set the tone within a spiritual atmosphere just as Christ did with the church. When we read the four Gospels we see how Jesus was a leader and leader his people. He invested in people, cared for them did things that he was telling His followers to do. So therefor husbands are to be the head of the household because they are to be leaders not bosses.


  25. In your Facebook post you said ”“The peace from being in God’s will, the ability to teach and model Scripture to your children, being the hands and feet of Jesus to your family, having a boss (husband) who loves you well, being able to rest and nap during pregnancy, and the satisfaction that you are DOING WELL at something that feminists say you can’t handle. I’ve heard SO many mothers say to me, ‘Oh, I could never do what you do. I couldn’t deal with my kids all day.’”
    Therefore you did call a husband a boss.

  26. A woman named Paige wrote that if you read the post. And I find it highly ironic that you and other women are so offended by thinking of their husbands as their boss (the ones they chose to love until death do they part) but call some strange man that they work for their boss. It sure makes no sense to me!

  27. You find it ironic because you do not understand it. If you go back to Ephesians 5:22-33 you will see how Paul makes several statements about the relationship between husbands and wives, and he presents the relationship between Jesus and the Church as a model or example. Some think Jesus’ authority is given here as an example for husbands to follow. Rather, unity is the example, and Paul uses a head-body metaphor to illustrate this.
    In marriage, the husband (the metaphorical “head”) and the wife (the metaphorical “body”) are united. To foster this unity, Paul urges husbands to love their wives “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Eph 5:25). He further urges husbands to “love their own wives as they love their own bodies,” and adds, “He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the Church” (Eph. 5:28-29).

    Paul uses the word “love” six times when speaking to husbands in Eph. 5. Six times! (v.25 X2, 28 X3, 31 X1.)

    Paul continues with the theme of unity by quoting Genesis 2:24, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh” (Eph. 5:31). (Note that leadership and authority are not mentioned in this passage. Paul never uses a word that means “lead” in his words to husbands.)

    Paul was not teaching husbands to be bosses, and wives to be employee like. Instead, he urged husbands to love and nurture their wives, and he urged wives to be deferential, cooperative and loyal (i.e. submissive), as well as respectful, to their husbands (Eph. 5:22, 33b).

    In Ephesians 5:22-33, husbands and wives are singled out and given instructions concerning certain attitudes and behaviors. But this doesn’t mean wives are exempt from being loving and nurturing towards their husbands, or husbands are exempt from being submissive and respectful towards their wives, especially as Ephesians 5:22-33 is prefaced by a call for all to be mutually submissive (Eph. 5:21), and chapter 5 opens with a call for all to love sacrificially as Christ loves (Eph. 5:1-2).
    In all essence a husband is to treat his wife like Christ treated the church. As stated before when we read the four gospels we will see nine traits that show Jesus being a leader rather than a boss.
    1)Jesus was not self-promoting. (Mark 1:11)
    Bosses are very self promoting and have a lot of the narcissistic traits where as leader do not.
    2)Jesus was obedient to the Holy Spirit. (Mark 1:12-13)
    Leaders obey authority bosses do not.
    3) Jesus cast a vision, with clarity, simplicity, and directness. (Mark 1:15)
    bosses hate being clear, love to make things hard, and not be direct.
    4) Jesus was a strategic team builder. (Mark 1:17)
    Bosses hate the idea of team building rather they like to tear down people and us “I” instead of “we” and a family unit is made up of a team no one is an individual in a family unit.
    5) Jesus was a relationship builder. (Mark 1:19)
    Bosses can care less if they have a relationship with their employees leaders on the other hand thrive off building relationships because then then they can accomplish the mission at hand.
    6) Jesus expressed control and authority as a leader when needed. (Mark 1:23-25)
    Leaders know when and where to call the shots and they know how to balance authority and delegate it when need be. They don’t get drunk on power. Whereas bosses are constantly giving out orders and controlling things to the point of abuse and getting drunk on power and authority causing harm to others.
    7) Jesus engaged crisis head-on. (Mark 1:30-31)
    Bosses do not have the slightest clues as to how to engage in crises and how to tackle them head-on. They freak out coward behind others and throw people under the buss just to protect themselves Leaders do not do any of this. They are brave and take responsibility stand up for their team and even sacrifice themselves for the greater good.
    8) Jesus practiced daily prayer. (Mark 1:35)
    Bosses do not do this.
    and finally
    9) Jesus was all about empowering others. (Mark 1:40-45)
    Bosses once again care only about themselves and place their needs above the rest. Leaders do not they encourage others,help when needed, and even put themselves in a role that serves others.
    All in all husbands are to be like Christ and Christ was a leader not a boss. You may find it ironic all you want but until you understand why women get “offended” you will always view marriage as a contract between two individuals rather a team in which there is a leader.
    FYI I am not saying this to be mean or whatever I am just kindly helping you understand that women do not marry their bosses when in fact they marry their best friend. They marry someone to help lead them guide them, and build their family up as a team. Women (even the most feminist of the bunch) are more willing to submit to their husbands when they are lead and not bossed around.

  28. I know you must seem to not like my refutes but look at it this way you go me cracking my Bible and praying more. Just saying.

  29. Well, you went to a lot of work for something I didn’t even say! But it’s good that you are digging into the Word of God. I don’t teach women how their husbands are to love or treat them since God didn’t command that I teach them. I teach women how they are to love, submit to, and obey their husbands regardless of how their husbands treat them, since this is all part of biblical womanhood. We will only be held accountable for our behavior not our husband’s.

  30. MA hasn’t refuted anything. She (he?) wants give Christian wives an excuse to be unsubmissive to their husbands by promoting the falacy that their husbands are required to lead. Husbands, indeed have a responsibility to obey God by loving their wives as themselves. However, this has no bearing on wives’ responsibility to submit to their husbands. Husbands aren’t even instructed to “lead”, per se. But wives are instructed to follow; after all, what is submission/obedience if not following. Also, no where are husbands instructed to submit to their wives. Though the converse is true, and on no less than 6 occasions in the NT alone.

  31. Tonight, I am feeling under the weather. My hubby is cooking tea, my children are tidying up. I feel very lucky to have such a caring hubby.

  32. Scripture is really very clear and straight forward on all matters. Many churches (and individuals) go to considerable effort to distort that which is clear cut via lengthy word manipulation. When attempting to make Gods Word say what is more comfortable to a particular preference, it always comes across as trying to fit the round peg in a square hole. It requires extensive explanation. This is the clue that it’s a distortion. Real Truth needs no long winded explanation. It speaks for itself.

  33. Marine Angel,

    Boss..? Leader..? How about head and lord! The Bible calls the husband the “head” of the wife (Ephesians 5:23) and Sarah considered Abraham to be her “lord” (1 Peter 3:5).

    Functionally, does YOUR body do what YOUR head tells it to do? If it’s functioning correctly it does! That’s the picture the Bible is demonstrating. The head gives instructions, the body follows them. Is your body really concerned whether it’s being “lead” or “bossed” around?

    Kinda silly to make such a distinction but since you want to make such a big deal out of it, let’s see what the Bible really shows. The Bible makes it clear that in the marriage relationship, the husband is the “head” of the wife and she should consider him to be her “lord”.

    “For this is how the holy women of the past adorned themselves. They put their hope in God and were subject to their husbands, just as Sarah obeyed Abraham and called him lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right without being afraid. ” (1 Peter 3:5-6).

    The word “lord” in (1 Peter 3:6) is the Greek word “kurios” that by definition, means “owner and master”. If a wife wants to be a TRUE daughter of Sarah, she should not consider her husband to be a teammate! She should not consider him to be (just) her boss, or be overly concerned about his “leadership” abilities. She should consider him to be her “head” and her “owner and master”. THAT is what the Bible consistently shows regarding the marriage relationship in both the Old and New Testaments.

    In the Old Testament, husbands actually purchased their wives and they were considered to be their husbands property. Both Paul and Peter confirm that nothing has changed about this in the New Testament.

  34. I completely agree with you. We do not have to serve men, however I do believe that sometimes it is nice to spontaneously cook for my girlfriend. The look on her face is the sweetest thing ever when I bring her lunch because she doesn’t eat enough.

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