The Benefits of Being a Keeper at Home

The Benefits of Being a Keeper at Home

Many women have asked me about being a keeper at home once their children are grown up and gone. Should they go out and get a job? I love being a keeper at home in my older age. I am available to help my children with their children at any time. I get to cuddle with my grandchildren, feed them good food, and watch them play outside. I have the privilege of holding my brand new grandbaby and helping my daughter who just gave birth with anything she needs help with. Instead of being available to help a boss and/or clients, I am available to help my husband and family. I love it! I also have plenty of time to mentor other women and help others in need.

Recently, I asked the women in the chat room to help me come up with all of the benefits to being a keeper at home. This is what they came up with!

Kristie: “Raising children without governmental (education) control of the children and fulfilling the Bible actually, such as Proverbs 31.”

Amanda: “Because God says so and His ways are best!”

Sarah: “We are much less likely to miss children’s milestones!”

Healthier: “We have healthier eating options, because there’s time to cook. We can spend time thinking of special treats and surprises for our husband and children.”

Christine: “Serving your husband versus serving someone else or even multiple people!”

Carla: “It brings joy and contentment. It’s obedience to God’s Word. You have the time to do the housework and make meals without feeling run ragged. You are not influenced by the world. It’s the best!”

Torre: “It’s way less stressful. You never have to choose between a bosses wishes and your family. My husband works shift work so it’s easier for us to go do things during the week when I would normally be working.”

Kristen: “There are so many good answers here already but another one I thought of is freedom and flexibility! I love having a daily routine, and I love that I’m in complete control of it (under my husband, of course). And if something comes up, we can almost always accommodate for it.”

Whitney: “Babies love being with their mommies. Also, you have complete control over your home (after your husband) so you decide what food is eaten, what TV shows, if any, are watched, what the kids learn day to day, and so on.”

Sonja: “The greatest reason I can think of is that it is what Titus 2 commands. Other reasons include – it protects women from the world. A wife has more time to devote to raising her children and caring for her husband after a hard day at work. It’s a blessing for a man to come home to a quiet home and a meal ready for him. There are so many reasons!”

Paige: “The peace from being in God’s will, the ability to teach and model Scripture to your children, being the hands and feet of Jesus to your family, having a boss (husband) who loves you well, being able to rest and nap during pregnancy, and the satisfaction that you are DOING WELL at something that feminists say you can’t handle. I’ve heard SO many mothers say to me, ‘Oh, I could never do what you do. I couldn’t deal with my kids all day.'”

Lindsey: “When both work outside the home, there is fighting, bitterness, and discontentment over the tasks that are not getting done in the home. Women are angry because their husbands don’t help out and they have so much to do in so little time with so little energy. Your children don’t get sick as often because they’re not in daycare. It’s easier to breastfeed because you don’t have to pump at work.”

Christina: “I have time to invest into my family! I was just thinking about this the other day. Investing your time well with no regrets!
God’s ways are always the best ways.”

Jama: “Less stress, plenty of rest, and raising my own children. I don’t have to answer to a boss but have the privilege of happily serving my husband.”

Jennifer: “Okay, I’m gonna say it…more time for lovin’! We’re not constantly exhausted (except maybe through the newborn stage), and we’re not having to get up early for work so we’re able to please our husbands before they go to work. Did you know guys’ testosterone is naturally higher in the morning so they are more interested first thing when they wake up, versus women that usually have a higher desire for that in the late evening?”

Sandra: “The United States economy. When women enter the workforce wages go up and companies raise prices to accommodate. Men have to compete for jobs and when they do find one, it’s hard to work with one income versus when it was the norm. I also blame the now popular school shootings on children not having a mother in the home.”

Lorrie: “You can teach your children. If someone else is raising them, they WILL learn bad habits, bad words, bad attitudes, bad behaviors, and probably things that are not age appropriate. This does not happen (as much) if they are home with you full time! They can learn scripture and other things you deem important.”

Faith: “The smell of freshly bathed children. I am able to practice hospitality more as my home is always open, able to attend to needs of others such as a sick parent, babysitting for a friend, teaching my children all sorts of things, cooking awesome food, am available to my husband, and am able to take a walk. I love being at home ??.”

Kaylee: “1.) Bonding with children
2.) Bonding with husband
3.) Homemade meals
4.) Gardening
5.) Time to read how to have a healthier home
6.) The home is clean
7.) Can homeschool
8.) Less stress, less mess
9.) Breastfeeding babies
10.) Proper rest in pregnancy

“And to add, it’s just dumb to have my whole paycheck go to my car payment/insurance/gas to get me to work AND daycare for children so I can go to work. I might as well just stay home!”

Cassie: “The majority of these awesome reasons are based on the children being little. So I am sure someone will say, ‘But I don’t have little kids at home anymore’ or they are in school or grown. Being at home allows you to be available freely for your children when they get home from school, or to school them yourself. Being at home gives you the freedom and flexibility to be there for them if they are sick. It gives you the freedom and flexibility to be there for your adult children if they need help moving or need you to spend time with the grandkids. Being home allows you to have the house kept up so that come the weekend, or whenever your husband has off, you’re not busy doing those things and are able to focus on spending time with him. When not home, you’re too exhausted to be intimate with your husband or do your own hobbies and crafts. I have recently had to go back to work. My son is grown and my daughter is 15 and homeschools. These are some of the major things I am missing.”

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.
Proverbs 3:5, 6

31 thoughts on “The Benefits of Being a Keeper at Home

  1. It’s an honor and privilege to be provided for and protected by a strong man and leader! Sad many women take it for granted or see it as enslavement. He works hard to provide for the family, why is it his duty to work a job but your drudgery to work hard to make him a home to come to?

  2. I love being home with my children. If a woman gets bored being home with her’s than she is just a boring person. There is so much to do and after the children are more independent you may have time and resources to be like the Proverbs 31 woman. I think a lot of worldly women are just not able to think outside the box and that is their real problem.

  3. I am an empty nester keeper of the home. At first I thought I couldn’t possibly justify this. But for many years I had felt the urging to stay at home. I was very very aware of this urging. But I resisted, because my deeply ingrained worldly way of thinking told me I had no valid reason to stay home, and I should be “out there” making money and accomplishing something!

    But over time I have been shown why even as an empty nester, I have a very important assignment in being home.
    In a word, I’m AVAILABLE. My 34 yo son said I always answer the phone when he calls. He stopped in the other day and we had a 2 hour chat about something heavy on his mind. I am keeping a young mother’s boys on Wednsedays while she goes to a Bible study. Today I’m taking a friend to outpatient surgery.

    And of course the first reason, I look after all my husbands needs.

    Being a keeper of the home has proved to be the most fulfilling career I’ve ever known.

    I’m glad I finally became obedient to God’s divinely created role for me as a woman. I only regret that I did not do it sooner!

  4. 1. You can make your own schedule
    2. If you or a child or your spouse is sick, you do not have to worry about asking for a day off
    3. More time to get chores done during the day, so evenings and weekends are free for family time
    4. Uninterrupted time with your child during crucial developmental stages (0-4) (and obviously more if you homeschool)
    5. Time to read and do hobbies
    6. Time to cook, shop, or grow healthy foods
    7. If your children are in school, you will have time to help them with homework
    8. Free time to attend your children’s sports games, recitals, concerts, etc.
    9. Less money spent on commute, childcare, cleaning or lawn maintenance service
    10. Free time to meet up with other moms, playgroups, family members
    11. You can get fresh air whenever you want
    12. Run errands during the day so you can spend time with husband and children in the evenings
    13. Time to go to the gym or workout at home

    This list isn’t even “Biblical.” Secular or wordly women may find the benefits of staying at home are numerous!!

  5. I agree with previous posts. You get to raise your children right, making sure they’re not being manipulated by the media. You get to cook the meals, ensuring that your husband and children are eating right and above all you get to devote yourself to a man who has dedicated his life to providing for you. It’s a shame modern woman view these as being outdated and beneath them.

  6. Lori, I asked my husband what he primarily appreciates about having a stay at home wife and he had a number of things to say; majority of which have been touched on in the post and the comments. One other thing he mentioned is that at his work place, he is relaxed and solely focused on the job during his working hours. He doesn’t give the day to day running of the household or the welfare of the children a thought because he is confident that these matters are being seen to by the best person that he could possibly find to do so. He mentions that many colleagues of his both male and female, often fret about taking impromptu days off or half days off here and there to deal with poorly children or domestic emergencies, which interferes with their productivity. Many suffer lost time at work when childcare falls through and often some have furious phone conversations with their spouses during office hours, haggling over whose turn it is to stay with an ill child.

    These same people end up working late and on weekends to try and make up for lost time which further interferes with their family time, whereas my husband has no need to work late, work on weekends or habitually complain about the inconvenience of children. Some colleagues meaning to do him a favour, once warned my husband that if he valued the peace and tranquillity he appears to enjoy liberally, he must put having children off as long as possible; to which he happily responds that their advice is five children (and counting) too late. He has taken great strides in his career since I quit work and he credits this to the peace of mind resulting from having an MVP at home, full time; which allows him to be fully present and accounted for during office time.

  7. Just today I made cookies for my husband (he likes to have a steady supply of healthy, homemade cookies around, and I am happy to serve him in this way!), and our 16 month old son helped me with the entire processI I was amazed at how much he was able to actually help me, how well he responds to simple commands, how quickly he is able to learn a new task, and the obvious satisfaction it gave him to know that he was helping Mama with an important job. I am thankful that I am able to be at home and spend this one-on-one time with him (something that he would never get at a daycare center!) and it’s incredible to see all the new things he’s learning daily.

  8. I agree! I also don’t think it helps being on social platforms like Facebook, for instance, when we’re constantly inundated with friends who are having more “fun” than we stay-at-home moms do (I say “fun” sarcastically) and compare themselves with such. My friend, who says she’s a stay at home mother, but works throughout the week, says she’s constantly bored… she has an almost 1 year old and crawling… For the life of me I can’t figure how she’s bored. I have a year old son as well and I am constantly busy either playing with him when he’s up, or cleaning when he’s sleeping, then in the evening when my husband comes home, it’s dinner then trying to get ready for the night. Literally, my only “downtime” are the occasional 15 minute showers I take! So for me to hear that she’s “bored out of her mind”, it baffles me to no end — unless she has an “easy” baby, which, let’s be real, what baby is really “easy”? It really also depends on how much time do you want to invest in your children in order for you to be “bored out of your mind”.

  9. I was a stay at home mom, and am so blessed to have a husband that knew it was important. And now that my son and daughter in law have twin babies, I can help them! Yes, it’s a lot of work, but I love it!

  10. How about the fact that you can greatly control what your children are exposed to? You (if you homeschool) literally choose their curriculum and teach them, not to mention just having a goldly worldview and perspective on life.
    My 4 year old commented on how daycare seemed fun, since there were lots of other kids to play with and lots of toys. I told her it may be fun in some ways, but most public daycares and schools don’t care about Jesus and wouldn’t teach her about Him.

  11. My husband has started a new job and is SUPER stressed.

    He’s not always nice all the time. That’s not an insult, it’s just a reality, and it is a product of him being on the go constantly and not getting enough rest.

    Because I stay at home, I can deal with it. If I had a job full time and was dealing with my own stress, it would all crumble.

    You can’t have two strung-out people in a relationship.

  12. Another wonderful side effect of being a stay at home mom : since our sons are 19 and 17 years old, now I get to travel with my husband when he has business trip to do, which we greatly enjoy to do together!

  13. I have had multiple back surgeries and learned pretty quickly that a full time or even part time job left me with no energy to care for my home or family by the end of the workday. Even at home, I have to pace myself, work differently than I used to, and take rest breaks several times during the course of the day. Being at home means that I have the energy to make meals, keep the kitchen and house clean by breaking tasks down into smaller steps (doing one small load of laundry for each family member daily instead of a massive pile on the weekend and cleaning as I go while working in the kitchen or bathrooms instead of trying to get everything done after dinner when I am exhausted.), and am more “present” with my family). This also allows me time to exercise daily which helps with pain management and some “down time” when I overwork and end up with a lot of pain. My life is much more manageable this way and my family gets the best of my efforts rather than seeing an exhausted worker bee who fell asleep on the couch within minutes of coming home from the office.

  14. I’m a stay at home wife without children. I was never able to get pregnant and then later on needed to have a hysterectomy due to medical issues, however I absolutely love being at home and my husband enjoys me being here as well. He comes home with the home clean, bed made, food either ready or almost ready, I’m so much less “hard” and he says much more “sweet “. I do my best to keep expenses down so he doesn’t feel like he’s out working hard just to watch his pay check fly away on silly things. We don’t have loads of money but who says that’s what makes life enjoyable anyway? Simple living is best.

  15. Mother Dearest, what a great testimony to your husband’s work colleagues that you can have a larger family and not be stressed or tired due to having a stay at home mother take care of things. I have seen the benefits in that area as well, where my husband has been promoted over and over at work as he can focus and fufil is duties well. He tells me about the men at work who are always having to leave early or take time off due to sick children, daycare pick-ups etc and then don’t have meals waiting for them. He tells me that they are not doing well with work because they are tired or unable to get the job done. Ironically those two income families are in real debt!

  16. Yes this is super important and the main reason we homeschool. We can decide what our daughter is and isn’t exposed to and I believe being a keeper at home is also about being a gatekeeper and monitoring what goes on in our home and our childrens lives.

  17. To be honest that sounds like me ive grown pretty dull and depressed in the past few years, i just had my 4th child in August, but i need to break out of that. I want to raise my kids right. Its hard for me to not get discouraged with life sometimes. I struggle with anxiety as well. Any advice from you mommas would be appreciated. Blessings to all of you <3

  18. Now my children have flown the nest (one interstate ☹), and one a young adult who gets supported by a disability organization, I can do some volunteer work. And I love it! I learn new things, meet new people, and enjoy myself. It’s great!

  19. Hi Macey ?! Being occupied with young children is certainly challenging, as your 4th baby was born just last month! I understsand your reality! My best advice is to rest in God and to fill to the top your mind, heart and life of Him:
    – Trust in God, Proverbs 3.5
    – Delight yourself in God and His love, Psalms 37.4
    -Do your work heartily as unto the Lord, Colossians 3.23
    -Know that you will receive your reward from Him who sees in the secret of your tasks no one else sees! Matthew 6.4
    Love to you!!

  20. Hi Carrie-Lee,
    Thanks so much for your post. More stay at home wives and moms will make the world a better place. My husband and I decided before we got married that I would never work, children or not. My oldest (of three boys) started kindergarten when I was 26. I’m 43 now and can’t tell you how many times people (mostly women) have asked me for nearly 20 years now “are you not going to work now?” or “what do you do all day?” “Aren’t you bored?” You may have gotten these questions too! But you are following God’s plan for to live a life of biblical womanhood. Always love, serve and obey your husband in everything and trust he will take care of you. But remember to take some time to care for yourself and relax a little. We have to take care of ourselves in order to be able to be the best help meet we can to our hubbies!

  21. My brother and sister in law both work full time..40-50 hours a week. They have two very young children. Their life is SO hectic, as I look at them from the outside there is NO way I would want that life.

    Kids bouncing from a different child care provider every other day, spending HUNDREDS of dollars every month on take out and frozen foods, bickering about whose turn it is to do some sort of chore or to cook a meal, incredibly unkept home only because there is just no time to keep it clean!

    This summer my brother told me he dreamed to go on a vacation just him and his wife. But they could not get their vacation schedules to coincide so they never went. This made ME sad for them as they NEED a break and quality time together!

    I am so blessed to be a keeper at home!

  22. Even when i was milking cows and feeding calves with my husband i still considered myself a Keeper at Home and I also homeschooled our children and in reality was at home. When the children left home oh how i struggled having an empty nest. 5 years ago our son passed away . He was 20 and had had a freak farm accident followed by the hospital missing an injury which led to his death. He was the one child who still “needed me” and i would do him baking, do his washing and help him all i can as he lived on a different farm about 10 minutes away. I told someone ” I was not ready to stop being his Mama” He gave his life to Jesus 1 week before he passed away in a miracle that only God could have brought about. At that time i said to my husband i would never work on a farm again and i never have in 5 years. But what to do with myself. For a long time i grieved and then i began doing the things i had done all along- gardening, canning, handcrafts to bless others. Then 2-1/2 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Huntingtons Disease . When he can no longer work i still will not go out to work. I am too old for a start. I am content to be at home. To be honest i rarely want to leave my home unless it is to do the shopping or help our daughter. I have always loved being a Keeper at Home.

  23. I am so sorry about the loss of your son, Karen. What a blessing that you were around to care for him all of his life. You have no regrets about this, I am sure. Now you are caring for your dear husband. May the Lord give you the comfort and strength that you will need during this difficult season and provide all of your needs and more.

  24. Hi,

    I stay home with my baby girl. I couldnt stand the thought of her in daycare or with anybody. Its a lot of work,, dont know how anyone could be bored. Even family could give her bad influences. 🙁

    God Bless

  25. I have often heard that a woman “should” get a job outside their home once their children were grown so they can stay busy. However, when I was over tired with 5 young children I knew what I would do when my children were grown. I would find a woman or two in my church, or among my kids, and give them each a day of my time every week. Basically go in and get them caught up on laundry, clean their bathrooms spic and span, and make several meals for the week. How much this would have helped me when my kids were small and I was homeschooling. I had no near family, and so often struggled to get everything done. This could be the help a young mother needs to stay on top of things.

    During this same time I knew a young mother of eight who eventually gave up and sent her kids to the public schools. She was encouraged to have kids and do it all. She also had no local family and when 8 kids came in 10 years she fell apart physically. But instead of her pastor asking women in the church to come alongside her and help, she just kept getting platitudes about trusting God. (I do not mean to imply she shouldn’t have kept trusting God and held on strong, but just the the church could have been the arms of God for her, and they refused.) She caved out of discouragement and physical exhaustion.

    Yes, women whose children are grown, get a job: Go help that young lady you know clean her house. Help her do her laundry so she can rock her baby a few minutes longer without guilt. Clean her bathroom and put up a couple meals so she can have energy for her husband when he comes home from work.
    But for the sake of the gospel, be a keeper at home.

  26. It pays to be available when your children needed you most.if you understand that you just have few years to be with them your perspective Will change and you wouldn’t have much struggle deciding to always be available for them.understanding God’s purpose for giving us children Will be a great help,aside being a help meet for our husband.It is highly rewarding and the children will rise and call us blessed and we will reap a handsome reward from our pays to partner with God in raising godly arrows as replacement regrets doing that cos it gives satisfaction.

  27. I have experienced many of these benefits as a stay-at-home mom. I’m a single mom but I’m praying that the Lord will bring a future spouse who values traditional marriage and who would embrace my role as a keeper of my home. I also homeschool my daughter and work from home. I have been reading Scriptures and listening to biblically sound sermons on biblical womanhood recently, and I’ve watched cleaning videos and homemaking tutorials so that I can prepare myself for that time in my life. Thank you, Lori, for this blog. It makes me feel like I’m not alone in thinking this way.

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