Esteem Him Higher Than Yourself
Many women do not like it when I teach them to not deprive their husbands sexually, but I will continue to do so since it’s biblical.
“Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency” (1 Corinthians 7:5).
Defraud means to “to withhold wrongfully from another what is due to him.”
Incontinency means “lack of self control.”
Yes, this verse is to the husband and the wife but since I only am commanded to teach women, I will.
Wives are not to defraud their husbands sexually (1 Corinthians 7:5).
When they married their husbands, they have become a wife, a help meet (Genesis 2:18), to their husband.
They are commanded to be obedient to their husband (Titus 2:5).
They are commanded to submit to him in everything (Ephesians 5:24).
They are to treat him how they want to be treated (Luke 6:31).
They are to esteem him higher than themselves (Philippians 2:3).
They are to learn what pleases him (1 Corinthians 7:34).
They are commanded to love him (Titus 2:4).
If he is disobedient to the word, they are to win him without the word by living in subjection to him with godly behavior (1 Peter 3:1,2).
These verses and commands are hard for women who don’t have soft hearts towards the Lord and His ways. Their hearts have been hardened by feminism, selfishness, and sin. They accuse me of teaching women that rape is okay. They will distort what I teach to make it ugly and evil. They know not the bondage that they are in due to the deception they are believing.
Dear women, obeying God has nothing to do with your emotions and feelings. You may not feel like obeying God or you may not be “in the mood,” but as you mature in your faith, these will no longer be excuses you use to disobey God and defraud your husband. Obeying God and pleasing your husband will take over your selfish desires, and you will learn that there truly is freedom in Christ!
Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
19 thoughts on “Esteem Him Higher Than Yourself”
A great reminder for all wives!
Please continue to do the Lord’s work. I definitely needed to read this today.
Women are all about rights, but only THEIR rights. If defrauding your husband of sex is taking away what is rightfully his, and feminists applaud that, then they are not for EQUAL rights, they are exclusively for WOMEN’S rights. A doubleminded woman is unstable in all her ways ??♀️
Amen! At the end of the day its all about glorifying God with our choices.
Truth Seeker, Can you say more about this? How do you know this to be true?
Wonderful post, Mrs. Lori!
When out shopping you can throw in something abit extra. Light candles. Put on fresh sheets. Perhaps this is especially for when you’re ready to get back at it after the break you’ve had after the baby’s birth.
Women flaunt wanting to have sex all the time while single, but then complain about how it’s a chore when they’re married and their husbands have to “earn” it by loading the dishwasher or letting them have a girls night out. It’s all over the place online and on social media. It’s sad.
I know this to be true but struggle in the times that “I’m not in the mood.” What would be your advice or how have you handled this in the past?
Change your thinking! Our actions flow from our thinking.
I think once you submit in your mind, it’s easier to just relax and go with it, which will allow you to get in the mood.
Truthseeker is spot on. My body my choice, but it was only possible with a man’s seed. Was he consulted in that decision? What if he wants to keep the child? Women are much more self centered. Men are much more likely to see the big picture and sacrifice themselves for God and country. Women want the best of both worlds; protection and dominance.
My dream of being a great wife in this area have been shattered since getting married. It’s been so painful and I have prayed that the physical pain will go away but it won’t. I’ve never turned him down and we are very frequently intimate . But I know he doesn’t like it because I always cry from the pain. My doctors aren’t figuring our whats wrong and it’s upsetting.
Go see a GYN about this and use a lot of lubricant. There may be something else that is causing the pain. This is why it needs to be checked out.
Love is an action not a feeling, its something you do. You have to choose to do what you know pleases God and not go off how you “feel”.
I’ve been seeing a GYN, a fertility specialist, and a pelvic floor physical therapist. We’ve tried all the lubes in the past 10 1/2 months.
I don’t know what’s wrong, and I’m beginning to feel hopeless.
Newlywed, please please Google “vaginismus.” It is real and it is treatable. You need a specialist to treat it.
They have ruled out vaginismus and other things. I am more concerned about my inadequacy as a wife to my husband. Created to be His Helpmeet talks about waking up every day and making yourself into the person your husband desires. But what do I and how do I cope when despite my best efforts I’m not changing into what he needs? There’s so much guilt and I don’t know what to do.
Physical pain is not a moral downfall. You cannot help it if you are in so much pain you cry. You cannot will it away. Guilt should not even be part of the equation. Your husband should be helping you to search farther afield for help from more specialized doctors. This is not a moral failing anymore than migraines or cancer are moral failings.
Truth Seeker. But how do you know this is true? Are you an older woman? If so, I am happy to be guided by your experience. I assume you’re married, of course?
Lovely post, Lori! I hope you are feeling better and continue to heal.