I Don’t Judge Women. Truth Judges Them.

I Don’t Judge Women. Truth Judges Them.

In our devotions the other day, we read these verses: “But if all prophesy, and there come in one that believes not, or one unlearned, he is convinced of all, HE IS JUDGED OF ALL: And thus are the secrets of his heart made manifest; and so falling down on his face he will worship God, and report that God is in you of a truth” (1 Corinthians 14:24, 25). What does prophesy mean? We are given the answer in 1 Corinthian 14:3: “But he that prophesies speaks unto men to edification, and exhortation, and comfort.”

Prophesying is speaking the truth of God’s Word. As I wrote last week, I receive comments from women that I’m judging them because I teach the truth of God’s Word. As I was pondering this, I realized that truth always convicts. For those who don’t like being convicted, they shout out at me, “YOU’RE JUDGING!” They want to ignore the conviction of truth instead of change. They enjoy their godless lifestyle more than living in obedience to the Lord.

Truth judges people. It exposes the sin in their hearts and in their lives. This is a good thing if received with a soft and teachable heart. “He is judged by all – By all that speak; by all that they say. The ‘effect’ of what they say shall be, as it were, to pass a ‘judgment’ on his former life; or to condemn him. What is said will be approved by his own conscience, and will have the effect to condemn him in his own view as a lost sinner. This is now the effect of faithful preaching, to produce deep self-condemnation in the minds of sinners.” (Barnes’ Notes)

Therefore, it’s not me who is judging as I am often accused. The truth brings judgment into their lives because it points out their sin and they don’t like this one little bit. When I teach women to be keepers at home, I am not judging career women who choose to work away from their children. The truth of God’s Word is judging these women. When I teach women to be submissive to their husbands, I am not judging unsubmissive women. God’s Word is judging unsubmissive women.

This is why so many women actually hate what I write. They don’t like someone who teaches the truth of God’s Word because of its conviction and judgment in their own hearts. They much prefer their ears to be tickled and feel comfortable with how they are living their lives. They love feminism and what it has accomplished. They don’t like hearing that their entire lives are based upon lies and deceptions from the prince of the power of the air.

This I say therefore, and testify in the Lord, that ye henceforth walk not as other Gentiles walk, in the vanity of their mind, Having the understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God through the ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart: Who being past feeling have given themselves over unto lasciviousness, to work all uncleanness with greediness.
Ephesians 4:17-19

17 thoughts on “I Don’t Judge Women. Truth Judges Them.

  1. Well, yes, just yesterday I was having a discussion with a few younger women about modesty and ,of course, I was labeled judgmental. The only thing one can do is try to point out to them that as Christians there actually is a standard, the Bible, and that we are as Christians expected to hold each other to that. I also reminded them that it’s much better to have the sting of correction now, than the eternal suffering of hell. Well, they expressed their respect for me as a godly Christian woman, but made it clear that I could have no idea as an older woman how to define modesty. Well, what can I do at that point if they won’t listen? Pray for them, leave them to their stubborn hearts. God help us.

    1. Yes, that is a problem, Amy. If God wants the older women to teach the younger women biblical womanhood, then this means the younger women should want to learn from the older women!

  2. Personally, I go with the “judge not, lest thou be judged” verse. I’m a long, long way from perfect, so I don’t judge the way others live. If they can use bits of my life as an example, great. If they have questions, I will answer them. If they ask my opinion, I will give it. But there is no way I am going to go around judging other Christians for the things they are doing “wrong” and pointing out there flaws in the name of “truth”.

    Of course, that is just me. I’m not teaching anyone, and nobody seeks me out to learn from me, so my perspective is a bit different, I guess.

    1. If we had to be perfect to exhort others, then no one could exhort or make judgments but this isn’t the case. We are commanded to speak the truth in love. We are also given this command: “But exhort one another daily, while it is called To day; lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.” (Hebrews 3:13) Exhort means “to advise; to warn; to caution.” Older women are commanded to teach the younger women biblical womanhood.

      Eternity in hell is a long, long time – forever, in fact. We must keep this in mind and have other’s well-being and their eternal soul’s destination above our own comfort level and what we want.

      1. Eternity in hell is certainly a long time, which is why preaching the Gospel, the good news of salvation by grace through faith in Jesus Christ is so important!

    2. There are two different sorts of judgement: judgement of discernment and judgement of condemnation. We must abstain from the latter but not from the former.

      The verse you quote is about judgement of condemnation. Don’t condemn because you are a sinner, and who can tell how you will act when you will be tempted? Can you really be sure to be better than another? No, so don’t condemn.

      In the common language, we conflate judgement with condemnation because in court most cases end up with a conviction (this happens because the prosecution needs to present a pretty solid evidence of their case otherwise there will be no trial).

      However we are called to practice judgement of discernment. That’s what you do when you buy new clothes: you choose according to your needs, your size, your budget. Are the other clothes in the shop wrong? Of course not, but they are not right for you. So you exercise your judgement and you buy the most appropriate clothes.

      This process happens and should happen all the time, otherwise we are immature and childish. Of course as Christians we live by moral standards that are different from the secular ones and a conflict between the two is inevitable.

      1. Mrs G – I agree with what you’re saying. And for me, I do practice judgement of discernment daily. For myself, and my children. But I don’t believe we can practice judgement of discernment for anyone else. If we try, it’s condemnation.

        How can we tell someone that they are doing something wrong when we don’t know their full circumstances? Only God can do that.

        Judgement of discernment is only something we can do for ourselves. Not anyone else.

        1. You wouldn’t want someone to judge your husband’s behavior as wrong and confront him if they knew he was having an affair? There are many things that we can judge someone’s behavior as wrong without knowing the full circumstances. All the women who went to see Fifty Shades of Gray, I judge them going to see this as wrong and immoral for supporting and watching such a wicked film without knowing all of their circumstances.

          1. Yes Lori you actually have a point. Same as murdering and stuff like that – yes we can judge then without knowing the full circumstances. I guess I was thinking on a more minor scale than big, clear, obvious sin.

            I watched 50 shades of grey because I wanted to see what all the hype was about. It wasn’t that great. I fell asleep.

            I don’t think I would want to judge in a condemning way though, but rather, I would want to help.

            One of our church preachers once said that one of the signs of a hardened heart is seeing faults in others – a soft heart would see a need. So that is the way I would like to look at it (which is perhaps the way most people look at it) – judge the sin for what it is, but see a need; see someone who needs prayers and perhaps support/practical help etc. rather than condemnation and a “I’m better than you” attitude. The “I’m better than you because…” attitude is something I’m all too guilty of, which is why I just try not to judge at all. I need to work on my own heart first.

          2. I judge sinful behavior because of the harm it does to those who are committing it. I am sure you knew how evil 50 Shades was, yet many (even Christian women) went to watch the evil which was wrong regardless of the reasons why. I never judge actions to condemn or think I’m better than others, but to try to get people to understand that the path they are on leads to destruction. This is why we are to speak the truth in love. It’s the most loving thing we can do – warn others about the enemy’s lies that they are believing.

        2. Someone near and dear to me is causing me a lot of pain and sorrow for their behaviour. I don’t condemn them but they are doing something seriously wrong to me and I have no problem with saying it.

          I can explain the situation by the family values/circumstances in which this person was raised, by the fact that society condones if not approves their behaviour and by many more reasons. Mine is a judgement of discernment because what this person is doing is plain wrong. However I do not condemn them because I can’t honestly say that, given how they were brought up, I would have acted differently.

          However difficult, I’m making a serious effort to forgive them, to bless them and thank God that they are in my life even if now they are making me suffer a great deal.

          God has listened to my prayers and granted to me some sort of inner peace and I’m really grateful for it.

          So, to come back to the original point, I believe that we can and should practice judgement of discernment in all circumstances, otherwise we fall into moral relativism.

          In my opinion, the difference between judgement of discernment and judgement of condemnation is our attitude. We can come to the same conclusion (that behaviour is wrong) from very different perspectives: discernment if we limit ourselves to point out the wrongness, try to understand why and genuinely give the person the opportunity to change; condemnation if we point out what is wrong with the arrogance that in the same situation we would act in a better way and we are not open to understanding and forgiveness.

  3. Thank you Mrs. Lori for the blessed TRUTH in the Word of God. I’m enjoying reading many of your beautiful posts …may God Bless you always!

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