No Discretion When It Comes to Breastfeeding

No Discretion When It Comes to Breastfeeding

We were having a discussion in the chat room recently about breastfeeding. It’s amazing how many Christian women think it’s fine and dandy to openly breastfeed their babies and show their breasts to men who aren’t their husbands. It riles women up when I teach them to be modest and discreet even while breastfeeding. They falsely believe that breasts aren’t sexual and it’s men’s fault if they like to see breasts while nursing because they are “perverts.”

Women have told me that Jesus’ mother Mary breastfed openly in the temple and Catholics have shown me pictures of Mary’s breast hanging out in preparation to nurse her baby. There isn’t one single Bible verse that tells us that she breastfed openly! Not one. I am sure she was known as a godly, discreet, and modest woman since God chose her to bear His Son.

I am all for breastfeeding! I believe it is far superior for babies to have milk from the mothers. I loved breastfeeding my four children for a year but I never breastfed openly for other men to see my breasts. I would have felt shame in doing so.

Here is a comment from one wise women on this topic:

It’s like people don’t read the scriptures anymore and do word studies. It annoys me. Men are visual or there wouldn’t be so many verses about the body in Song of Solomon alone! But since this is about breasts here are just a few verses on them.

Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love. – Proverbs 5:19

This verse is implying that the breasts are satisfying and here we are seeing the encouragement for them to always make a man filled with delight. The King James uses the word satisfy which implies that they are satisfying to a man. They aren’t drawn to things that are not satisfying.

Both satisfy and delight mean to be filled, take pleasure in. It is the same delight that is used when it says God delights in His people. The way God delights in His people is the way a man is to be about his wife’s breasts only. But like everything that is beautiful in God’s Holy Word and ways, it gets perverted by the world we live in and you have men delighting in other women’s breasts and you have women practicing zero discretion. Zero.

If that wasn’t enough to show that men like breasts here is another verse..

Your two breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle, that graze among the lilies. – Song of Solomon 4:5

Your stature is like a palm tree, and your breasts are like its clusters. I say I will climb the palm tree and lay hold of its fruit. Oh may your breasts be like clusters of the vine, and the scent of your breath like apples- Song of Solomon 7:7-8

How beautiful are your feet in sandals, O noble daughter! Your rounded thighs are like jewels, the work of a master hand. Your navel is a rounded bowl that never lacks mixed wine. Your belly is a heap of wheat, encircled with lilies. Your two breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle.- Song of Solomon 7:1-13

The man in Song Of Solomon was clearly attracted to this woman’s breasts. Why did God allow that to be in His word for everyone to read? Because men love breasts and in the context of marriage it is a beautiful thing! But again the perverted world we live in would like to believe this isn’t true or simply don’t care like they do with homosexuality. They believe it simply isn’t true that God hates it or they don’t care.

I wish people would just dig into scripture and read.

And furthermore, do we really have to be so dense to think that if it’s isn’t in scripture it must not be a real thing! I mean it doesn’t say in scripture that smoking marijuana or taking heroin will make you high as a kite but we know we would be fools to think it doesn’t. There is just a place for common sense and this is one of them.

Sorry for ranting. It annoys me when women make excuses for their ignorance.

In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety.
1 Timothy 2:9

11 thoughts on “No Discretion When It Comes to Breastfeeding

  1. Yep. I hear you about this. It makes me frustrated to see so many so called Christian women that don’t cover their breasts. They let them hang out in from of my husband…bending over a million times in front of him. It makes me sick to my stomach actually. And yes, I know some who think it’s ok to breastfeed without a cover too.. and it’s crazy to me that their husbands think it’s just fine too! My husband has told one particular husband that we would appreciate it if his wife wouldn’t do that in front of us. I wish every Christian woman just automatically had discretion and modesty 🙂

  2. I’m a Catholic and not once have I ever seen a picture of the Blessed Virgin Mary with her breast hanging out. Nor would I support such an image!

  3. To the comment above: there are many, many Renaissance images of Mary (comissioned by the Catholic Church) nursing the infant Jesus. If you go to Italy or even to the Fine Art Museum in your state you can see this. I am not making any judgement here, just letting you know that the Catholic Church did commission paintings like this.

  4. I believe you can breastfeed without a cover and still be discreet. I always wear a nursing tank under whatever top I am wearing, that way the top of my breast is covered as well as my stomach. With my first born I practiced this in front of the mirror – can’t see anything but the back of baby’s head! And much easier to manage than a cover, at least in my experience where breastfeeding did not come very easily and was a huge challenge. I see way more cleavage just going to the park/grocery store/etc than I ever display nursing! I think there is something to be said for normalizing breastfeeding as well. Granted my oldest is only 6, but he never pays attention to me or any of my friends nursing babies, to him it is just how babies eat. I wonder about other cultures where women are topless all the time, when considering these Song of Solomon passages; will have to do some further studying… Not trying to justify anyone being immodest, just trying to offer perspective from one who struggled terribly to breastfeed and the cover only made it more difficult.

  5. Hi Chelsea,

    We don’t look at other cultures to decide how to live. We look at the perfect Word of God since we are a remnant and most people have no desire to obey the Lord’s commands. He calls us to be shamefaced which means to do nothing to draw people’s attention to us. God has made it clear in His Word how we are to live modest and discreet lives.


  6. Covers are finicky, but it’s better to be completely covered so that the men don’t have to wonder if we are. Let’s spare them the hassle!

    There are “poncho” style covers out there. Even a normal “poncho” will do. You can pretty much walk around nursing, they’re so easy. They’re not going to fall down, and the back is covered too. Yay! 🙂

  7. It always surprises me when women argue that ladies in biblical times openly breastfed . I mean why in the world were these women covered head to toe when out ? It makes no sense to think a culture, expecting that level of covering would not chastise a women for having her breasts exposed to nurse. Are people able to logically think anymore or are they so blinded by having to be right in this argument they can’t figure this out?

  8. Hi Lori,
    I completely agree with you about breastfeeding discretely! I could not ever bare my breasts in public and never needed to when nursing an infant. My question to you and I really value your opinion, is about breast implants. My husband has been wanting me to have breast implants for a long time as he finds large breasts erotic. I am so afraid of the side effects, of the surgery etc, but I am also afraid he may stray to find what he so desires outside of our marriage if I contine to say no to this plea. What is your advice?

  9. I am late on this article as I was googling Christianity and modesty. I hear you on this one Chelsea. Both of my children nursed on the hour, sometimes multiple times per hour and they got to an age where they absolutely would not stay under a nursing cover, and I tried different types, multiple types. Just because it seems “so easy”, such as the poncho style mentioned does not mean that my baby will stop flailing and pushing it off of himself. So I did as you talk about and tried my best to use layered clothing to make it work. I am all for modesty but I find some of these comments to be somewhat uncharitable to you, though I know they are seeking to encourage modesty and charity for men and other women too. My baby needs to eat and nursing is the only way. Not everyone’s body responds to a breast pump to make a bottle. It does not make you a poor Christian for caring for your child. We can’t run to a dirty public restroom to feed our babies, though some would tell us we should. There needs to be a balance. You should seek to be charitable to men around you but at a certain point people need to be charitable to the nursing mother too who is imperfect and desperately trying her best. It does not make her a Christian lacking modesty. If you are clearly trying to keep from being exposed but it fails, always do your best and pray for those around you to respectfully and charitably look away. God bless you.

  10. Sue Ross, I am surprised this one hasn’t been responded to already. The Lord God made our bodies. He created you as you are. We should do everything we reasonably can to be good stewards of the bodies He has given us and respect His creation. Breast implants have side effects, can be dangerous, alter God’s creation just to please someone else’s desires, and can actually cause loss of sensitivity to the breast. It is a mutilation of the human body (unless we are talking about reconstructive surgery such as is the case with breast cancer, etc.). If you are truly concerned about your husband straying because of this, there is a greater concern that needs to be addressed here. Please seek out your pastor or priest to discuss what else may be going on here in your marriage. Did your husband marry you, accepting you fully, or did he marry a fantasy of you he is trying to mold you into? I pray for you to receive discernment on this one, truly. I think maybe you already have though. Listen to the holy spirit my sister in Christ. God bless you.

  11. I am a man, and men are one thing…as Lori says, VISUAL. There is no reason for me to see a breast out in public. It offends me, because I know the woman does this out of hubristic self-satisfaction. I can see the look on her face, it’s a look of prideful will. This feeding of the babe shall be done in private, behind locked doors, away from the eyes of men…both Christ-centered and worldly. Sorry for my tone, but it just beggars belief that this even needs to be said to Christian women. God bless you Lori

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