Pastor Gets Blistered For Preaching Sermon to Wives
There’s a viral video of a pastor who actually preached to wives. This is SO uncommon. How many of you have ever heard a sermon preached to only wives by a man? So, here’s one who finally does and explains clearly men’s battle and what they would love from their wives, then he gets blistered. Sure, he could have stated some things a bit differently and left out a few things, but over all, he was spot on.
The title under the video is “Malden, MO Pastor tells women they need to stay attractive so men will not stray.” I listened to the entire thing to make sure what I write is true.
Here’s a summary of what he said:
“Wives, be attractive for your husband. Men are visual so dress to please him” which included their clothing, hairstyle, and makeup.
“After marriage, women tend to let themselves go, but the chase isn’t over! Don’t look like a butch. Men want their wives to look like women at home and in public, so don’t let yourself go.”
He did say that one man has a “divorce weight.” He didn’t give his opinion about this, but THIS is wrong! I definitely disagree with this.
His wife used to be heavy but has lost her weight. He quoted her as saying, “Food never tastes as good as skinny feels.”
I was wondering if he would get to the inner person of a woman, and he did. He quoted Proverbs 31:30, “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.” He expounded on this a bit.
He then goes to 1 Corinthians 7:4, “The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.” He did joke when he told men to get their Bibles out and read this verse to their wives if their wives were defrauding them. He goes on to say that “men need sexual intimacy. Sex is the main reason he married you! He also has the need to be admired by you.” He never did say that wives need to stay attractive so their husbands won’t stray, that I heard.
He did show a provocative picture of Melania Trump while talking about a “trophy wife” and telling wives that they don’t need to be like this. I wasn’t a fan of this and felt it was inappropriate, but most of what he preached was truth, yet many women were offended by this. They don’t want to be challenged nor told what their husbands would like.
God’s Word is clear about caring for our temple, since the Holy Spirit lives inside of us (1 Corinthians 6:19,20). We are not to be gluttons but only eat our portion and not allow food to master us (1 Corinthians 9:24-27). (Yes, I can see that the pastor is overweight and should take this admonition for himself too, but men are MUCH more visual overall than women, and he’s preaching solely to women.) We are commanded to not deprive our husbands sexually, so nothing he said was necessarily unbiblical but in these “modern” times, this type of sermon is unacceptable to many.
Women, take what you want out of this sermon and learn from him, since many pastors fear teaching this type of a sermon to wives. We should always be learning how to be disciplined and more godly wives. It’s also good to learn to not get offended easily. Life is a whole lot easier then.
I shared this video in the chat room, and here’s how one woman responded to it: “I listened to the sermon and was quite convicted by it! Why would I not want to know what men want in a wife? I seek this information.” She had a lot of “likes” on her comment since many women in the chat room have soft, teachable hearts that are not offended easily.
For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
1 Peter 3:5,6
22 thoughts on “Pastor Gets Blistered For Preaching Sermon to Wives”
I saw this video earlier in the week and almost sent it to you. I agree with your thoughts, the positive and the negative. Women I know where deeply offended. I wasn’t. It reminded me of Debi Pearl’s take on things. I have been married now for 40 years. Just this week my husband’s eyes have lit up, saying how pretty I look. He isn’t shallow, just appreciating the beauty he sees in me.
We all appreciate beauty, Vicki! There’s a picture I shared from the 1960s of people on an airplane. ALL of the women looked beautiful because they had taken the time to care for themselves; their hair, their makeup, and their clothing. Many women these days go out in the sweat pants and look like they just climbed out of bed. There’s nothing wrong with this pastor exhorting women to do what they can to stay attractive for their husbands.
I have a feeling this will be one of your posts that goes viral. People definitely have strong opinions about it. Back in my homeschooling days, there was a couple in a magazine geared toward homeschoolers. They either had 10 or 12 children, I can’t remember. The wife was lovely! Long brown hair, slim, light in her eyes and a contented smile. I have never forgotten what an inspiration she was!
I think it is a 2-way street. Men should keep themselves reasonably attractive as well. The “red pill” crowd, both secular and Christian, are fond of telling men: Rule #1 Be attractive. Rule #2 Don’t be unattractive.
Looking at the comments on that video, it’s no surprise why so many men are now avoiding marriage even to “Christian” women. The attitudes displayed speak volumes.
She was an inspiration because she didn’t allow herself to go to pot. People, namely Christians, forget that we are commanded to do everything in moderation, including eating, and master (discipline) our bodies and not allow them to master us. Any women who has self-control and disciplines her body will be more beautiful than one who does not. Also, having the joy of the Lord makes us beautiful from within. Both are important since they’re both Biblical!
Well said Lori!
Wow what a shame. The pastor was just preaching biblical truth. I commend this pastor and thank him for preaching despite the back lash.
I would concur mostly with Lori. I would add that the pastor in question making the comment about carving 1 Corinthians 7:4 into one’s bedpost is inappropriate; your wife isn’t someone you “conquer” when you come together. I found the truths he espoused to be delivered with a lack of grace. Furthermore, the commentary about Melenia and trophy wives and participation trophy wives is once again highly inappropriate as mentioned in the post.
The biblical term of a wife being her husband’s crown is much better (Proverbs 12:4); in fact, perfect and cannot be improved upon. When broaching these unpopular subjects it’s particularly important to use biblical not worldly language and to do so gracefully which the pastor didn’t do adequately.
What a brilliant pastor! Needless to say I totally agree with every word of his sermon. I come from a generation where I would never not wear a suit and tie to church so whilst I am not keen on his sartorial choices, I do envy you Americans for having such charismatic, humorous and dynamic preachers. It is quite uplifting to know that God’s Word is in good hands.
Lori, I completely agree about the way women used to dress. When I put together my mother-in-law’s albums, one of the first thing I noticed was that she always looked like a lady! There’s a pic of her vacuuming and her hair is done, she has a floral dress on, and a ruffled apron. She told me it was an older dress but it wasn’t ratty looking at all. (and she had 6 kids under 12 at the time!) I remember my grandma had a similar dress. Just before dinner, she took about 30 minutes every day, bathed, freshened up her hair, and put on a clean pretty dress for my grandpa’s arrival. He’d always comment on how pretty sh looked and how good dinner smelled. It was obvious who her #1 earthly priority was.
There’s a picture of a airplane in the 1960s and ALL the people on the plane were impeccably dressed (well put together). People used to care about this when there was a lot more order in our culture. Now, there’s mostly chaos and it shows.
This is certainly one major reason for the negative reaction to the video. This guy’s message would probably have had a more positive impact AND been taken more seriously if he himself didn’t have what can only be most kindly called a “dad bod.” He should remove the plank from his own eye before complaining about sawdust spec in someone else’s. It would behoove him to hit the gym for a while himself before bringing up wives’ need to do so.
Oh eureka! So that’s why the fashion industry keeps pushing uglier and uglier clothing each year – pants, pants, pants (i wanna puke 🙁 What a brilliant way for the devil to destroy marriage – many wives must work full-time, and don’t have any time left over to find/sew feminine clothing; being only human, after awhile she gives up and gives into ugly.
I agree. My husband and I both keep ourselves in check when it comes to weight. And not just weight, we both regularly go to the gym. I know he appreciates and athletic figure and you know what? So do I. I let him know a “dad bod” is only okay if I can have a “mom bod” with the “mom jeans” to go with it. Haha! Luckily exercise and fitness is our most important hobby!
Honestly, yes. If someone is going to lecture me on dieting (like some actual registered Dietitians have) while their BMI is well above what is healthy, their credibility ultimately shoots down. Even if what they are saying is true, the message is just not well portrayed or recieved
Ugly is very subjective. I personally think my grandmother’s prairie dresses were inconvenient and ugly and she would probably think my gardening jeans are inconvenient and ugly lol!
There are many heavy doctors who are telling their overweight patients to lose weight. These heavy doctors, even though they can’t control their own appetite, know what’s best for their patients.
I agreed 100 percent with this article lori . I mean who wouldnt want to look good for their husbands?
Illustrates the principle that when we are going to say something we know people are going to be offended by we need to stick to Scripture. If they are offended by Scripture, that is between them and God.
The problem this pastor had was he tried to be funny and injected a lot of his personal opinion and preferences.
Hi Nick, on re-watching this on You Tube with my wife I’m inclined to agree with you. Initially I liked his charismatic and entertaining delivery (which, is something I’m not used to with our vicars and church leaders in Britain) but he should have stuck to The Scriptures, some of his comments were unnecessary.