Raising Sons in This Feminist, Anti-Male Culture

Raising Sons in This Feminist, Anti-Male Culture

It grieves me when I see young Christian women calling themselves feminist when we look at all of the destruction they have caused and are causing. Why not call ourselves feminine women who love the Lord Jesus instead! The Federalist wrote an article about Kellyanne Conway, Counselor to the President, whether or not she would call herself a feminist.

She answered: “I don’t consider myself a feminist. I think my generation isn’t a big fan of labels. My favorite label is mommy. I feel like the feminist movement has been hijacked by the pro-abortion movement or the anti-male sentiments that you read in some of their propaganda and writings. I’m not anti-male. One does not need to be pro-female and call yourself a feminist, when with it comes that whole anti-male culture where we want young boys to sit down and shut up in the classroom. And we have all of these commercials that show what a feckless boob the man in the house is. That’s not the way I see the men in my life, most especially my 12-year-old son. I consider myself a postfeminist. I consider myself one of those women who is a product of her choices, not a victim of her circumstances.”

The author of this post, Leslie Loftis, goes on to say how horrible feminism has been for men which many men would agree. “In elementary school, when we drug little boys (and active girls) so that they all conform to our notions of the good little student — that is, the eager-to-learn little girl — the drugs seem to help, for a while.”

We didn’t drug our sons. We knew they were boys and weren’t made to sit in a classroom chair all day long. I finally wised up and began homeschooling them from fifth grade through ninth. They loved those years! They didn’t have to be around all of the JUNK that goes on in the public junior high school. They played, ate, read, played, ate, did math, played, and ate, and went to their sports’ team practices and games. It was a perfect life for boys but it takes a mother home full time with them in order to acccomplish this.

Leslie went on to write, “…boys grow up feeling entitled to women’s bodies and thinking that they can go for it whenever the urge strikes.” My sons did not grow up like this because we consistently taught them the truth of God’s Word, plus (and this is a BIG plus) we didn’t and wouldn’t send them to public high schools and universities from the ages of 15-21 years old where these schools are more like Sodom and Gomorrah than anything else. My sons learned to “bounce” their eyes and run from sexual immorality from a young age and knew that women are to be valued and respected. Both of their wives can attest to this fact today!

Leslie’s conclusion: “It doesn’t matter how we raise our sons. Cultural assumptions run against them, and eventually most of us learn this truth, sometimes the hard way.” Not true. Raise them in the church. Stay married. Hide God’s Word deeply in their hearts. Talk to them openly about everything. Set boundaries of protection. Discipline and train them from the time they are young. Teach them to work hard and they will most likely grow up to be strong, godly men; just what this country needs! Then they will be a product of wise choices, not a victim of any circumstances since Christ in them is stronger than anything that may be thrown their way.

 I have written unto you, fathers, because ye have known him that is from the beginning. I have written unto you, young men, because ye are strong, and the word of God abideth in you, and ye have overcome the wicked one.
1 John 2:14

18 thoughts on “Raising Sons in This Feminist, Anti-Male Culture

  1. while we can disagree on that feminism is a horrible thing that happened to our women.. we CAN agree that raising boys to not be MEN is just wrong.
    a woman can be a doctor if she wants, or a SAHM if she wants to. feminism allowed us that choice.
    and we should teach our boys that it is ok to have feelings and be able to show emotion. but not at the expense of making them feel like they are less than.

    i see friends post mugs with the slogan “male tears” as if they are drinking “male tears”. this is so wrong! can you imagine the outrage if someone had a mug with “female tears”.

    men are men and women are women. we are different. our career & life goals may be the same, but biologically we are still different. and it’s ok to have those differences!! this is what makes the world go around.

    1. Our culture was a lot better when men were the providers and protectors and women were being cared for by their husbands while being busy in the home caring for their husbands, their children, and their home. Man can NEVER improve upon God’s ways. The mixing up of the roles have created nothing but chaos in every area. The farther a culture removes itself from God’s ways, the worse and more depraved it becomes. Yes, feminism started out “innocently” maybe but what they were fighting for from the beginning in America was to be men because they weren’t content being women.

  2. That is a great quote by KellyAnne, but at the end of the day she has children and is a working mom/ career woman. I don’t know if that is right or what sort of time she can possibly spend with her kids. Kinda like Sarah Palin.

    1. Yes, it saddens me too, Meg. She, at one time, said that she wouldn’t work for President Trump when he became president so she could be home more with her family of four young children. I was sad for her, her husband, and her children when she decided otherwise. She always looks exhausted and others can take her job with the president but no one can take her place in her children’s lives.

  3. acm,

    My wife is a doctor…. and never practiced after we had our first child. Unfortunately she was a feminist and at heart, still is. She only stayed home because having kids was part of the post feminist thing to do just like Kellyanne. Children were and are part of a feminists “fulfillment” after they have done unmentionable things.

    I know I am not in the minority. The way my wife pushed me aside after our first and second as if I was there to be her helpmeet.

    She was all about raising our son to be more sensitive, but his core nature was to run toward risk. When he was a young teen, instead of allowing me to mentor him in a masculine way his indiscretions wore her down as I watched until she couldn’t anymore. After basically throwing him at me at 14, I was then allowed to mentor him, but it still had to be her “way”. Boy did that cause the worst 4 months in our marriage and our kids lives. Finally she conceded 90%. Our dd can sew, cook and clean, but has absolutely no clue how to attract a young men and she is of marrying age. She is thin and exercises, is attractive (of course, she is my daughter but really is), does all sorts of activities from rock climbing and horse jumping to having her hunting license. My wife has raised her as a feminine imperative woman but not as a feminist (thank the Lord). No imput from me because “obviously I have no clue as a man”. I have been treated like the stepdad our whole marriage.

    The chickens are coming home to roost though. Unfortunately my wife is going to have an empty house shortly and due to putting me last on her list (she’ll claim she hasn’t), I have my hobbies in place that don’t include her. I can feel it in my being that we will grow further apart. She does nothing to pursue me and after 20+ years of pursuing her I am tired. After the kids leave, I am do not care if she leaves. She abandoned me sexually for 15 years and even after that she doesn’t make herself available. Although she doesn’t refuse me, she is only enthusiastic once every other month. Forget special requests…

    After kids she never pursued me. I don’t think she will after they are gone. I am now ok with that.

    I don’t know if she knows how to pursue me, as she certainly hasn’t taught my daughter how to show interest in young men that we all know are interested in her. They give all indication that they find her attractive and like her, but none will ask her out. My wife thinks it should ALL be the mans duty and by duty I mean everything. She creates issues and then when she is done I am the one that has to patch things together… the very definition of FI.

    1. My only reply that I can think of to your comment, Jeff, is this verse:

      “As for my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them. O my people, they which lead thee cause thee to err, and destroy the way of thy paths.” (Is. 3:12) along with tearing her home down with her own hands. Many don’t even understand that they are doing this. They are blinded to their poor choices and actions.

    2. Jeff, you speak of your wife “allowing” and “not allowing” you to do things that were your responsibility. I’m curious why you gave her that much power in your marriage? We women will almost always take the reins if our husbands don’t remind us from time to time who the head of household is. I’m grateful that I have a husband who will politely but firmly let me know when I step outside my God ordained role.

      1. Grace, there are more than a few women out there that are so bull headed, prideful and contentious that they are going to do what they want to do (and not do what they don’t want to do) regardless of what their husbands do. There is no amount of conversation, reasoning, encouraging, admonishing, expressing displeasure, getting upset or even screaming at the top of your lungs that will change their minds. They are going to do it their way and nothing the husband can (legally or morally do) will stop them.

  4. I am only telling you this because she claims born again, as I am. I was raised very strong morals and she was raised opposite.

    I tell you because I wish someone would have told her. It would take an act of God (everything is possible) to change my heart to her.

    If you think you are an expert in who or what your husband is or wants, reevaluate. Many husbands will tell you what you want to hear because they do not want to stir the pot so to speak.

    I did and have talked with her since the beginning of our marriage. She has asked for forgiveness for sexual refusal, but sadly does nothing to change it.

    Please allow your husbands most of the input with your son. If your husband is a christian he can’t be so horrible that he can’t raise your son. What your husband does may not make sense to you, but it will to your son, either now or in the future.

  5. I’ve been told before that I’m raising my teenage son to be sexist because someday when he marries, he wants his wife to stay home and raise children.

    1. That’s very sad, Mrs G. Both of my sons wanted this and were blessed with wives that wanted this too, thankfully. One of my granddaughters is sleeping on my lap while I type this with one hand. Her mother took the older two to visit a farm! 🙂

  6. 2 of my boys are very manly boys, but the youngest one if not, he is a lot more sensitive. He’s not feminine by any stretch of the imagination, but he’s certainly not as masculine as his big brothers. I concluded a long time ago that the reason for this is he was only 11 when his father got sick so missed out on a lot of that manly influence. His brothers are both older so had their father as their mentor for longer than he did.
    My first husband was a very soft, gentle giant of a man, but he sure taught our sons how to be men.
    My now-husband (my sons stepdad) does try his best and my son looks up to him as a role model, but it is difficult.

    Men play such an important role in the raising of our sons it is terribly sad when fathers do not have the input they should have.

    1. It sure it, Marjorie. My sons were very blessed having their father so involved in their lives and raising them to be men. Keep praying for your younger son that the Lord would put in other strong, masculine men into his life.

  7. Very good post Lori. I am sad that KellyAnne has taken such a big responsibility and this will take its toll on her family for sure. And just tonight we saw Mike Huckabee’s daughter interviewed about working in the White House. I was so disappointed because she was raised in a christian home and knows God’s Word and yet is leaving her family and home which is so much more important that the White House.

  8. I want to encourage those of you who are frustrated at seeing your wives, or women in general discipline children. I completely agree that men should be teaching sons to be men and women teaching daughters to be women. I also think that husbands should be setting the pace for how children are disciplined, and wives should follow their husbands leadership. With that being mentioned, I want to share a personal experience. My husband grew up largely without his father in his life, and was raised by a young mother who didn’t discipline him. He was not given any boundaries, neither was he encouraged to live in a godly way. For some time he looked like every other young man in the world. After awhile, he had learned lessons the hard way by sewing bad behavior and reaping consequences. However, in his early twenties he turned his life to the Lord, without much of a foundation from his parents. Fast forward to today and he is one of the most disciplined, loving and Godly men that I personally know. He has been leading in youth groups, playing guitar and worshiping during church services and leading bible studies, though not all at the same time, for several years now. He has led many people to Christ, laid hands on people and saw them healed, and had words of knowledge for people. He is a wonderful man of God, who was raised without boundaries by his mom. If scripture says to ‘train up a child in the way he should go, so when he is old he will not depart from it’ (proverbs 22:6), then how much more mercy does our God have for those lost sheep to come to reconciliation, who have not been brought up in the admonition of the Lord?

    The best case scenario for any family is to have daddy working hard to lead, provide and set strong Christian values for the family, and mommy at home nuturing and serving her family. Today, my husband and I are blessed to live out that scenario. Be encouraged to know that all situations that start out bad or less than favorable don’t always end that way.

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