God’s will for us is to only have sex within the bonds of marriage. My Mom taught us to wait for sex until we were married and I’m glad she did. I knew sex outside of marriage was wrong and would only give myself to the man who put a ring on my finger and vowed until death do us part. We taught our children the same thing. It’s safe boundaries for them. Children need and want boundaries, especially in this highly-sexualized culture we live in.
We are commanded in 3 John 11 to “follow not that which is evil, but that which is good.” So we follow the good, right, and holy in what we fill our minds with, what we see, and what we do. Before marriage, we follow sexual purity in all of our relationships. These are for our good! All of God’s commands to us are for our benefit.
I asked the women in the chat room, “If you were a virgin on your honeymoon, what benefit did you and have you found from being one?” Here are many of their responses:
“I remember on my honeymoon night thinking, ‘I am so glad I am married to this man since it’s SO intimate and we have LOTS of time to practice.’ 🙂 I also loved and love knowing that neither of us have anyone else to compare with and there was no chance of sexual diseases.”
“Knowing that I kept myself pure for my husband! It’s a great feeling still when I think about it now.”
“It’s a special gift I gave my husband.”
“I remember waking up on my wedding morning so thankful that I was a virgin. I would say that since we have both only with each other we trust each other a lot more than some of of our friends who did not save sex for marriage.”
“I am thankful that I saved myself for marriage. My husband was the same way so we both were able to learn only about each other.”
“Starting my marriage and faith in Christ with no baggage of sexual immorality is a blessing. It’s a great feeling that I did not fail in this area before coming to Christ and that I was pure for my husband to be solely his.”
“I think just knowing that we are the only ones who have ever seen each other in this way and definitely having no one else to compare with. It just makes it so much more special knowing that we saved ourselves for each other.”
“It made me feel safe because it’s so vulnerable that I couldn’t imagine sharing that experience with someone who didn’t just vow in front of God and witnesses to love you forever. I must say I was so nervous about leaving our wedding because I suspected most people knew we waited, so it was so awkward. I know I shouldn’t have been, but it was, at least for me.”
“Knowing that we will never have to worry about comparisons to past partners is something that secures us. Having something you’ve shared with literally only ONE person in the entire world is pretty amazing!”
“I felt like it was a very special gift we have to each other. There was no comparison, no pressure, just pure love and marital passion. 🤗”
“You are all very blessed!!!! I pray my kids will be able to make comments like this one day!”
“I loved that we both waited for our wedding night. I remember the day after our wedding night and being so aware of that oneness. In a day and age where so many people don’t think twice about sex before marriage, I trusted God’s ways and waited. And I was blessed more than I thought I ever could be. I am the only one in my family who waited until marriage and I love the fact that when we have children and discuss this issue, we can tell them that regardless of what the world says, we obeyed God and His word.”
“It was wonderful to be able to tell our children that in this sexually saturated culture that we waited until marriage and all of our children waited, too! They knew it was possible!”
“Purity, honesty, and loyalty… The promise of a complete and whole marriage that was not contaminated by immorality but filled with a true and lasting friendship that only he and I would experience with each other.”
“I thought it was a special gift we saved for each other and was so excited and nervous at the same time; to learn and enjoy one another in the most possible closeness with God’s blessing and permission.”
“I love(d) that my only experience has been how he/we like it. I don’t have to worry about past experiences clouding my mind.”
“I love that my memory of my first time is one I can remember fondly with him, not one I have to feel ashamed of.”
“Well…. I wasn’t a virgin, but I’m going to do everything I can to teach my kids how important it is to wait. These stories are beautiful.”
“Yes, my husband and I both were. It’s nice to learn it together, with no expectations and nothing to compare to. It’s special to only share that with your spouse. As with other ladies here, I agree pornography addiction definitely feels like an invasion and betrayal of that pure, private experience though.”
“We both were virgins and I think that has helped me completely trust him with myself, body, soul, emotions, etc. We both had insecurities about our bodies which the other was able to love unconditionally. I love the fact that he has been the only one I’ve ever been with so intimately! I have no images or emotions to overcome from past relationships. I’m also glad I can tell our children mommy and daddy understand the struggle but waited and are so thankful we did and encourage them to do the same. I remember we were so ready that we didn’t even stay very long at our reception! Like only one and a half hours and we were out of there!”
Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.