A Tale of the Breakup of a Marriage

A Tale of the Breakup of a Marriage

Men seem to be the brunt of many jokes in our society today. Read this tale that was wildly popular and I am sure all of the women were cheering.

He wrote a letter to his wife why he was leaving and divorcing her. She quit her job without telling him two weeks prior and hid from him the reason why. She didn’t notice his new hair cut, the meal he cooked for her, and the new silk boxers he was wearing. She ate quickly, watched all of her soaps, then fell asleep. She never tells him she loves him anymore and they never have sex. He informed his wife that he moved to Virginia with her sister. Gotcha!

She wrote him back. She called the seven years she’s been married to him as “hellish,” called him a bad man, and blamed him for why she was watching so many soaps (he was probably whining because he wanted sex). She thought his haircut looked like a girl. She didn’t like “her favorite” meal he cooked because it was pork and she doesn’t eat pork. He paid way too much for his boxers but she still loved him and wished it could have worked out. She hit the lotto for $10 million and bought two tickets to Jamaica but he was gone. He won’t get a dime from her. Touche!

Everyone cheers for the wife and laughs at the husband! I had to search to see if this was true or not because the words are so small at the end that tells us it was a tale.“That will teach him to ever think that he’s got a one up on someone, when he’s so clearly in the wrong. Share this hilarious tale with your friends below!” Yes, a great tale to laugh at the stupidity of this man. Well, I would like to turn it around a bit.

For the sake of this post, let’s pretend that it is true since it’s not far off of from what is happening with many couples these days (except for winning the lotto part). When mentoring couples, there are always two sides of the story but you can usually tell a lot about what’s going on by what each spouse says. It sounds like she was upset and unhappy with her husband from the beginning (“hellish”). Therefore, she refused to show him affection, appreciation, and give him intimacy.

Men have a difficult time handling this behavior from their wives and will usually fight back somehow or leave. (Affairs are never acceptable no matter how the wives behave, however.) If  men who are believers can relate to this tale, hopefully they will stay and fight for their marriage in a godly way. As some women suffer under disobedient husbands, there are men who suffer under disobedient wives. Since this fake man was most likely not a Christian, he went elsewhere trying to find respect and appreciation.

Since I mentor women, I will tell them how she could have fulfilled what her husband wanted. First of all, never hide things from her husband. There shouldn’t be secrets about actions taken. If she didn’t like his haircut, she could have still said, “You got a haircut!” and then given him a big hug and kiss. Ignoring is not acceptable behavior in a marriage. If he cooked a meal for her, she could have eaten everything but the pork and thanked him for going through all of the effort to cook for her. (You know, try to win her husband back to her instead of continually pushing him away.) Instead of eating quickly, watching soaps, and falling asleep, she should have slowly enjoyed the meal with him and then taken him into the bedroom to reward him with what men love most.

What can we take away from this? Husbands love and need sex. Respect them with your words and actions as the Lord has commanded. Tell them you love them often and appreciate everything they do for you. It’s not that difficult to make most men love living with a wife who does these things.

The way I retell this tale, no one laughs or cheers for either party but is saddened instead. Besides, it has been proven that those who win a lottery are usually worse off afterwards then before.  Money does not bring long-term happiness. The breakup of a marriage and divorce are tragic and never something to cheer.

The wife see that she reverence her husband.
Ephesians 5:33

9 thoughts on “A Tale of the Breakup of a Marriage

  1. “The breakup of a marriage and divorce are tragic and never something to cheer.”

    Amen. Sadly, I once received an invitation to a “divorce party” a few years ago by a woman who was divorcing her husband and thought it was something to celebrate! It reminded me of the Scripture that pronounces a woe on them that call evil good {Isaiah 5:20}. The Lord convicted me not to accept the invitation and attend.

  2. ” He informed his wife that he moved to Virginia with her sister.”
    An affair is an awful betrayal in a marriage but then so is refusal of sexual intimacy. If that tale were true his sister-in-law probably saw the good things in him and thought he deserved better than what he had with her sister.
    Refusal of sexual intimacy makes avoiding the temptation of an affair extremely difficult for men, something I have first hand experience with. If it were not for a friend recognizing what was happening and confronting me, I would have violated my vows. I consider it God’s intervention because no one else seemed to see what was happening .
    ” If men who are believers can relate to this tale, hopefully they will stay and fight for their marriage in a godly way.” This statement is spot on, Lori.

  3. It is good you didn’t attend, Lady Virtue. I will never celebrate something that God clearly calls sin. She celebrates now and many falsely believe they will be so much happier divorced, but unfortunately, they take themselves with them.

  4. Good for you, Charles. You are not alone but we, as believers in Jesus Christ, store our treasures in heaven and not on this earth.

    You had a good friend. This is what godly friends should do; convict and challenge us when they see us going down a path that is sinful.

  5. Just so you know, this must be an untrue story because I’ve seen the exact same one in reverse, with the husband being the one who quit his job because he won tickets to Jamaica or wherever. I’ve seen both sides of the story and people always bash the cheater, whether it was a man or a woman.

  6. Lori,

    My husband says the difference between a bad haircut and a good one is three weeks. But a bad marriage and a good one? You nailed it.

    A good wife can go to her good husband and say, “I shouldn’t have said such-and-such, honey. Will you forgive me?” When’s the last time a bad wife said SHE was sorry? Bad mates can be good mates, better mates and best mates. We just have to get unstuck from our own perspective.

    Sex and a sandwich. Now, there’s how to make a man happy. Isn’t it ironic that if we’ll simply give our husbands three things: sex, a sandwich (food) and a smile (respect), he’s a happy man? These are seeds that, if we would just be intentional to plant them, we would reap abundantly beyond what we could imagine or think in our mrriages. God’s Word works!

    I’m SO glad this was a tale, but sadly, it’s played out hundreds of times every day, if not more. SO sad.


  7. Yes, it is a tale. I made that clear in my post! 🙂 Yes, everyone loves to bash the cheater but fails to bash the spouse who is withholding sex, lack of affection, ignoring, etc. which can be as painful to the other spouse as an affair.

  8. That is the sad thing, Kelley, that it’s so common and it was popular because many could relate to the struggles this fake couple had in their marriage. I am so thankful we have the Word of God as our guidebook! He is so good and His ways are perfect.

  9. Lori,
    I followed the link you provide in the post but all I found was the wife’s letter to her husband.

    You say: “First of all, never hide things from her husband. There shouldn’t be secrets about actions taken.”

    I think this applies to both spouses. Nothing destroys trust in marriage better than keeping secrets about things your spouse ought to know. Chances are, he or she will find out some other way and it won’t be pretty. Are you in debt? Tell your spouse. Did you get in trouble somehow? Tell your spouse. Do you hate your job and want to quit? Tell your spouse. Are you deeply unhappy in your marriage? Tell your spouse.
    I think that talking about everything, even the hard things, or especially the hard things, builds trust and friendship. Your spouse becomes your ally and your partner, not the person you will try to hide all evidence from. How can you have intimacy if your’re keeping secrets from the person who shares a bed with you?

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