Written By Gabriel Hudelson on X

There is a war going on right now over what exactly Christian conservatism is calling young women to.

Last year, I criticized this event pretty harshly, simply based on the name and speaker lineup. I enumerated a number of problems which can best be summed up in saying that it was an exercise in feminism, teaching women to be “boss babes” instead of Biblical women – i.e., home-focused, gentle and quiet, etc.

At that time, a number of people rebuked me, pointing out that the conference was very heavily focused on motherhood, marriage, and the domestic arts. I listened to some of the messages, and ended up retracting my original post, realizing that I was speaking before hearing, and that I was heckling Charlie even as he was working so hard to advance the Gospel and a basic biblical view of the household and family and marriage.

My foot doesn’t taste very good, so I don’t want to repeat the same mistake here. Scripture tells us to listen first and talk later. Certainly, I don’t want to be the man criticizing the man (or woman) in the arena, unless I have strong Scriptural grounds for doing so. I would encourage all of my brothers and sisters not to jump on condemnation bandwagons just because it is the cool thing to do among your preferred internet tribe.

This is why I am not interested in, say, nitpicking TPUSA’s halftime show, or going full guns-blazing against this conference. I’m thankful for an organization that seems to be seeking to honor Christ, and while I may disagree on some of the applications, I’m glad that they’re in the fight.

(Plus, it’s not my job to police the wives of other men. That’s always a bad look.)

All that being said, I’m still very skeptical of this conference and others like it; for at least a few reasons:

1 – Is this really what Paul envisioned?

While some on the hyper-patriarchal bleeding edge spread too little exegetical butter over too much applicational toast when it comes to Titus 2, basically restricting women from discussing theology at all, at the same time, it’s pretty obvious that Scripture assumes a basic discipleship structure, and it is gendered.

The clear Biblical expectation is for the men to be the spiritual leaders of their communities – including of the women in their communities. Women are to be shepherded by male pastors and are to be discipled by their male husbands. (Ephesians 5:26)

While this certainly does not preclude discipleship and sharpening among sisters in Christ, the pattern of going away for intensive cultural and theological training by a bunch of young women is very far from the textual ideal.

“If they desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is improper for a woman to speak in church.” (1 Corinthians 14:35)

2 – Deborah did not build a movement.

“I will certainly go with you; however, the fame shall not be yours on the journey that you are about to take, for the LORD will sell Sisera into the hand of a woman.” Deborah (Judges 4:9)

When these topics come up, regularly, the same few biblical heroines are brought up: Deborah, Jael, etc.

The egalitarians bring them up as a proof texts to show that women can do anything, and nobody should have any questions about any of it. Which is silly. These women are obvious exceptions to an obvious rule.

The hyper-patriarchy guys respond by dismissing these characters as examples of things that were necessary back then, but basically should never ever happen again, often even making statements that would condemn these biblical heroines if they were alive today.

I would encourage us to think a little bit more carefully about these heroines of the faith.

Jael is an incredible biblical character. Talk about strong womanhood! But she was not an independent boss babe. She was a homemaker who used hospitality and homemaking implements to strike down an enemy of God.

Further, her actions were only necessary because of a failure on the part of Barak, the man that God had raised up for this military action.

This is no condemnation of Jael who is very praiseworthy. The blame rests with Barak for his abdication.

But note that we have no record that after this incident Jael made herself a tactical belt full of tent pegs and started a militia.

Deborah herself was legitimately a prophetess and a judge in Israel. It is worth noting that she was not just a judge; she was actually a prophetess of God. This already puts her in an exceptional category. This isn’t just something that you want to be when you grow up; it’s something that God sovereignly brings to pass.

Even still, when God called for an act of civil and military leadership, Deborah sent for a man. And she was happy to hand him the reins, and when he did not take the reins courageously, she rebuked him.

Nor at any point did Deborah start a political party, theological conference, or military division made up of the mothers of Israel.

So while I think a good argument can be made, for example, that when Allie Beth Stuckey was first bringing the Bible to bear on politics, and none of the “Christian conservative” male political pundits were doing this, perhaps she was filling somewhat of a Deborah-style role.

But there’s not a single example in Scripture of any of these exceptional heroines becoming permanently installed as figureheads for movements of women. To the contrary, the penultimate description of a godly wife in Proverbs 31 concludes by observing that “Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.” (Proverbs 31:23)

Contrast that with the below testimony, from an article on Allie Beth Stuckey’s conference for women “Share the Arrows”:

“Carolina Graver, 29, flew in from Palmer, Alaska, to see Stuckey in person. Listening to Stuckey’s hit podcast, ‘Relatable,’ in 2020 inspired her to serve on her local city council, she told RNS.”

So these ladies, who are well known in the city gates (while many of their husbands are completely unknown), are encouraging young women to do likewise. And this can no longer be argued as a Deborah-like exception; it is clearly becoming an aspirational norm.

American Christian conservatism is facing a crisis over what exactly we are calling our daughters to and we will not solve this crisis with technical verbal affirmations of the value of marriage and motherhood.

What we value will manifest in what we become, not just in what we say.

3 – “Leadership” and the cultural moment.

The choice of title for this conference is instructive. It is a “Women’s Leadership Summit.” Now, we should all be able to agree that any and everyone can and should lead in some way or another.

But “leadership” has a clear connotation, and words do actually matter. Is “leadership” the thing that we should be encouraging our young women towards?

Does Scripture encourage women to think as leaders?

Compare this terminology with Biblical values like:

– submissiveness (Eph. 5)

– teachability and not exercising authority over men (yes, this is stated specifically in the church context, 1 Timothy 2:11)

– obedience, gentleness, and quietness (1 Peter 3)

– a focus on loving husbands, children, and homemaking (Titus 2)

Our culture has a pretty good idea of what it looks like for women to be in positions of leadership, and it does not look like the words on the list above.

I would further ask if what is modeled in the conference advertisement that started this post matches the words on the list above. Be honest.

4 – More is caught than taught.

I think this is perhaps the most important point in this conversation.

When I talked about this conference last year, many folks pointed out to me that the ladies at the conference repeatedly emphasized the importance of marriage and family. And this is good, as far as it goes.

But we need to remember that a student becomes like his teacher (Luke 6:40).

So when we see a women’s conference that is headlined by a CEO and two high-powered political pundits, with TV stars, activists, athletes, and politicians on the speaker lineup, we need to recognize something.

No matter what is said about how wonderful marriage, family, and Titus 2 are, that speech says less to all of the young women in attendance than the glamorous shimmer of the gorgeous culturo-political “leadership” that is displayed on-stage.

Again, it is worth noting that Titus 2 specifically calls for older women to disciple younger women. All one must do is look at the poster above to realize that that is clearly not what is happening here.

If we really want our young women to grow up to be the kind of cultural influencers that God designed women to be, then we should want them to be learning from the kind of women that the Bible lifts up as exemplars and learning the kinds of things that the Bible tells those women to teach.

“The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” (Titus 2:3-5)

This probably won’t happen at a conference or over Instagram. It is certainly hard to imagine a speaker lineup like the one above effectively encouraging women to be busy at home (while modeling the exact opposite).

No. We need our ladies to be inspired by godly, gray-haired saints at our local church who have a massive collection of grandchildren, who honor their husbands, and who have a gentle and quiet spirit.

Those ladies shape culture in seismic ways.

These are the kinds of ladies that we should encourage our young women to look up to:

“Your adornment must not be merely the external–braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or putting on apparel; but it should be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way the holy women of former times, who hoped in God, also used to adorn themselves, being subject to their own husbands, just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord; and you have proved to be her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.” (1 Peter 3:3-6)

God grant that we would have legions of warrioresses like this raised up in this nation.

AM I A FEMALE PREACHER/SPEAKER?

Written by Me, Lori 🙂

Some have accused me of being a female preacher. How am I different from a female preacher/speaker?
1. They preach/speak in churches.
2. I am silent in church.

1. They mostly teach everything but biblical womanhood.
2. I only teach biblical womanhood.

1. They’ve made a career out of preaching.
2. Teaching biblical womanhood is not my career. My husband fully provides for me.

1. They travel from home often.
2. I am a full-time keeper at home.

1. They stand behind a microphone and preach/teach to a crowd and don’t interact with the audience.
2. I teach from home and interact with those who learn from me in the comment section, respond to emails, and private messages daily.

1. Many younger women must leave their children with others.
2. I was home and fully available for my children when they were home. Now, I am fully available for my grandchildren!

1. Most are not “aged” women.
2. I am an aged woman.

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