Rack Up Debt, Sleep Around, and Get Tattoos
When my post Men Prefer Debt-Free Virgins Without Tattoos went viral, I didn’t read many of the articles being written by Christians against me. There were too many and I just didn’t want to know what they thought. Soon after I published the post, one of my godly friends shared one of these articles with me and made the comment, “It seems like she didn’t even read your post!”
Throughout the months since that post, I will still get link backs on my blog from articles written against it. Once in a while, I will skim some of them. From what I gather, they would have rather me written a post telling young women that those who have racked up debt, slept around, and had tattoos can be completely forgiven by Jesus Christ and washed clean. “Where was the Gospel in that post?” they cried.
My post wasn’t about the Gospel. Every post I write isn’t about the Gospel. I am to teach younger women biblical womanhood, therefore, I was teaching younger women to think carefully before going to college and the debt they will incur, don’t have sex before marriage, and don’t get tattoos. Someone needs to be warning women about these things that are so prevalent in our culture.
“How do you know men prefer these things? Are there any studies that prove this?” I didn’t need studies to write that post. I only used a bit of common sense to figure out that most men would likely prefer debt-free virgins without tattoos. I don’t think many guys want to marry a woman with a ton of debt who has slept around with different guys and has tattoos all over. How difficult is this to figure out? After all of the hullabaloo over the post calmed down, I researched these things and found out that indeed, the majority of men do prefer to marry women as I described, as if this should be a shocking revelation.
Was it my goal to make women feel guilty who had a lot of debt, slept around, and had tattoos? No, but if I am going to teach truth, I will automatically offend some. Am I not supposed to teach women to be keepers at home because it will offend those women who are career women? Am I not supposed to teach women to be chaste because some women have slept around? Am I not supposed to teach women to be submissive to their husbands even though many women don’t want to hear this? The answer to all of these questions is NO. How will the young women who don’t have debt, haven’t slept around, and haven’t gotten tattoos know to not do these things if they aren’t taught? This is why God commands older women to teach the younger women biblical womanhood. They need to know!
“Well, why did you have to use the ‘Men Prefer…’? Back in my day and age when I was a younger women, most women cared about what men preferred. They wanted to get married and have children. They wanted to be attractive to good men who wanted to marry but maybe women aren’t this way anymore. Plus, men have been so demonized in our culture that they aren’t allowed to have preferences it seems. But no matter how much women don’t want men to have preferences, men still will, just as women have preferences.
“God doesn’t care about women being debt-free, virgins, without tattoos,” some wrote. He doesn’t? Where does it say this in the Bible? He’s very clear that we are to FLEE fornication (all sex outside of the marriage bed – 1 Corinthians 6:18) and “Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart” (2 Timothy 2:22). This is what God has to say about debt: “Owe no man any thing, but to love one another” (Romans 13:8) and that a debtor is a slave to its lender (Proverbs 22:7). Tattoos? I wrote an article about it called “Are Tattoos Sinful?” Just because “everyone” is doing something, doesn’t mean that it’s right or good.
God does absolutely forgive women who have slept around if they repent and believe in Jesus Christ. He forgives ALL sin when we call upon His name. But this doesn’t mean I should not warn young women to live godly and righteous lives. God wants this of them since His ways are perfect. He’s our Creator and knows what’s best for us. It’s best to live with as little regrets as possible and this is why we are warned to flee youthful lusts. There’s a good reason for ALL of God’s commands.
For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous.
1 John 5:3
41 thoughts on “Rack Up Debt, Sleep Around, and Get Tattoos”
Perfect way to fall into a life of resentment and unfulfillment!
It is sad, there has been so much vitriol against you, Lori. Many women have preferences for their future husbands as to whether they have tattoos or debt or are virgins, so why can’t men have the same? Double standards. If a man refused me because I have college debt and am not a virgin, that is up to him, doesn’t make him a bad guy. If God has a partner for me or any other woman, He will provide a man who doesn’t mind our past. God knows who He intends to marry! I read your article and nowhere in it did it say that women who have debts, tattoos etc will never find a husband. It just said many men say they prefer wives without those things. In terms of debt and virginity, I can understand especially why a man may not want to be involved (and I say this as someone who is a non-virgin with college debt). As for tattoos, well, if a man can prefer blondes or brunettes or redheads, or curvy or thin or tall or short women, what is wrong with that??? all a question of taste
To everyone else let us not demonise men who DO mind. God has someone out there for you if he intends you be a wife and there is no condemnation for past mistakes or unwise choices if you are in Christ.
Thank you for teaching us! I really appreciate you.
I have no idea if the authors of the articles written against your article think they are really helping women, because they are not. The whole world believes as they do, that there is nothing wrong with tatted up, in debt, promiscuous women. That’s not helpful. What is helpful (even if you ARE a tatted up, in debt, promiscuous woman) is knowing the truth. We should all be clear on the standard. There is an old saying, “No matter how far down the wrong road you go, turn around.” These articles aren’t giving women the knowledge to turn around. They are implying that being a tatted up, in debt, promiscuous woman is not a big deal and doesn’t warrant a change of behavior. Or that even if it does, there are no real consequences to living an unGodly lifestyle (and if there were no one should be told about them).
The authors of these articles hate women. They want them to continue to live in opposition to God by not clearly stating the standard. They ought to be ashamed of themselves and not proud as they obviously are by publishing articles against the truth.
I am so thankful that you constantly reiterate the truth in this confusing time. It is easy to get led astray, even as a Christian, but having you point to the truths of scripture daily is a blessing to us women who want to be Godly but didn’t know how or what the standards were.
Even growing up in the church 3x a week where only Bible was taught, two of the three things you mentioned were never spoken about even though God did in His Word. And the third thing, promiscuity, was not mentioned often and the spiritual consequences were never, not once, mentioned. So all these articles written against yours are just more of the same, impotant words.
I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering and doctrine. For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears; And they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables.
2 Timothy 4:1-3
I believe, whether they admit it or not, each woman has a moral compass and deep inside knows God exists. So whether or not a Christian or non-Christian is confronted square in the face with their sin, it stings and deep down there is a little knock at their hearts door that says , you can stop this and do better. However , those deep in sin don’t like people to know and don’t like being told they need to seek forgiveness, but most of all STOP sinning. It’s like they think they will miss out on fun or not catch that man they want. What i find funny is how upset, terribly offended, and upset they get when reading your post-if it didn’t convict them and they felt like what they they are doing is just fine and dandy, they wouldn’t have an issue scrolling on by. This indignant reaction tells all!
But the younger generation must hear this, because with the current state of home and families these truths aren’t being taught. They are completely foreign to this next generation. They need to hear there is a better way!
You’re exactly right. Many men have married women who weren’t virgins and had debt and tattoos. Yes, God forgives ALL of our sins if we repent and believe but this doesn’t mean that some men will not want to marry women with these things. The less baggage that we bring into a marriage, the better.
You’re welcome, Erin!
Thank you, M. Sadly, you’re right. The reason I received so much flak from that post is because the majority of young women aren’t hearing it from their churches, their parents, older women, or anyone else. It seems to be all about love and forgiveness these days but they need to study 1 John. God is clear that He wants those who call upon His name to walk in righteousness and we can because His Spirit works mightily within us.
“I don’t think many guys want to marry a woman with a ton of debt who has slept around with different guys and has tattoos all over.”
I was one of the men who read your original article, and like you, I thought “Duh!! This is a no-brainer!”
But it’s started to dawn on me more, lately, that there is a whole generation of “new” men (boys, really) who really don’t care if their girl has ink-injected skin, or has slept around with a half dozen guys before getting to around him.
And that’s a sad testimony to the culture of our times.
I personally find excessive makeup to be no different than tattoos. But people – both men and women – are evolving to the point that they no longer appreciate the natural beauty of our bodies just as God created them, without all the augmentation. As though God’s design needs improvement. Natural beauty is taking a back seat to “extreme” versions of just about everything, from soft drinks, to sports, to body hacking.
In my church, it is heartening to see a new young couple when the husband looks like a hardworking young man, and the wife looks like a young woman who is gentle and takes care of herself and her husband.
Amen and yes, God’s way is the better way! They are listening to the Father of Lies whose purpose is to kill, steal, and destroy. Sin hardens people’s hearts and this is why we need to keep speaking the truth of God’s perfect Word. They need Jesus.
I have a friend whose sons have all walked away from the Lord. She told me that her sons like the girls who aren’t virgins who are tattooed up but the reason they like these girls is because they can get something for nothing, unfortunately. Her sons aren’t looking for wives and mothers for their children. No, they are looking for a “fun” time instead. I pray they will repent and believe in Jesus Christ. They are all headed down a dark path.
I love seeing godly, young couples, too, Robert. They are the ones who know that God is good and His ways are good.
I began reading your blog daily after the “Men prefer…” post and appreciate your wisdom and discernment as I raise my daughters, and have dug more into Scripture to find God’s commands for women as a result of your teaching.
The only challenge I may have is that we cannot expect non-Christians will behave and make choices like Christ-followers. While sanctification is a life-long process, this reality gives me an attitude of immeasurable thankfulness and praise toward Jesus and His gift of salvation and His work in my life. Perhaps, make it more clear who your intended audience should be, consistently providing the Gospel as your rationale for what the world sees as controversial counsel. Offer an opportunity for readers to know and understand the Gospel. While some of your posts may be common sense even to non-Christians, I shudder to think of where my life would have ended up if I had not responded to the Holy Spirit’s calling. An education and acceptance of God’s Grace through the Gospel is paramount to understanding many of your posts, and practical avenues to learn more about God and His plan of salvation may further the ministry of this amazing blog.
It would be cumbersome for not only me but the readers to make sure that every post of mine clearly states who my intended audience is (Christian women) and I often make it clear that God’s ways are good, and acceptable, and perfect. One would only need to read a few more of my posts in order to figure this out. I had NO idea that post would go viral but God can still use it for good. But yes, we would not be able to live holy lives without His grace and Spirit working mightily within us!
I think that the reason they get angry is because deep down inside, they know it’s true. It’s hard for all of us when someone shines the light on our sin. We might become defensive, try and justify it, etc. But it’s still sin.
I find that the older I’ve gotten, the less defensive I get when confronted about my sin. And it can even be when I’m reading my Bible. Sometimes I’ll read something and say, “Uh oh….Lord, this is me.” When I was young, I was more apt to ignore it or convince myself how things today are different!
Lori – The attitude of your friend’s sons is becoming more and more common, unfortunately. It’s even becoming common at my kids high school – a Catholic school – sadly. It’s the cool thing to do. Wildly exaggerated tales of sexual prowess (among both males and females, these days) are the norm, now. It’s just what happens on a weekend – go out, get drunk, have sex, often with a different person each weekend. I fear for my children, with this attitude being so prevalent in society.
Women have always wanted attention from men. Always. My Nan used to tell me stories from her childhood and the different ways women (girls, really) used to try to catch the eye of attractive males. The difference was, back then, most of the women in my Nan’s circle were looking for a husband, not just a good time, so they wanted to be appealing to the type of man they were looking for – someone steady.
These days, many men aren’t looking for marriage – they’re looking for a good time – or getting something for nothing, as you put it. And to get that type of man, women have to dress appropriately – immodest clothes, tattoos, flirty manner, drinking alcohol etc. To get that type of man, they have to make it obvious that they’re offering what the men want. Sometimes, these casual relationships can lead to commitment but mostly they don’t. After all, why would the man want to commit when he is already getting what he wants? Women are financially independent now – they aren’t interested in commitment with the type of man who is a player, they just want to have fun with him.
We’re trying to teach our children to uphold the standards that have been instilled in them from a young age, but the world is working against us. I pray every day that my children will be strong enough to not succumb to peer pressure and to keep themselves pure for their future spouses, but it truly is scary times to be a parent in.
In my case, my hubby has a car loan, which will be paid off next year. We have both only had one partner- each other, and have been together for 36 years! But, I do have a small tasteful tattoo, which I got in my 40s. And I love God with every fibre of my being.
I can’t figure out why people are so triggered by you and feel the need to argue all the time. If I don’t agree with something you’ve written, I simply don’t agree and move on. I will say my husband is very bothered by how many women he sees with tattoos. I don’t really notice it, but he does.
I hope you never add the caveat of who you are intending your message for. I don’t mean to come across as argumentative and some may disagree with me, but when I read of the people God sent out to warn the people of their sin, it wasn’t always the believing community. Noah is one such example and Jonah being another. Then in the NT Jesus preached openly and many listened ( and sadly many more did not). His disciples were sent out to preach to everyone. I thought that was meant for us too?
With regards to the post, I had friends at school who had tattoos and slept with many guys. Girls trying to act like the boys .Before we were eighteen, I had one friend who had had two abortions, and another two friends that had one abortion by this age.
So I hope your messages reach many ‘non Christians’ and change lives!
Thank you, Sarah. Yes, I know that God’s ways are best for everyone! Everyone needs Jesus.
Amen a hundred times. It’s so sad to see people using the Gospel to mean “I can do whatever I want without consequences.” Bravo.
These Christian women were in a rage over the “Men prefer…” post because it didn’t talk enough about the get-out-of-jail-free card that many modern “Christian” women think they are entitled to. This is why I’m not protestant/evangelical anymore. I have more respect for the self-avowed secular feminist who doesn’t believe in marriage because she knows her lifestyle is not compatible with traditional values. The millennial generation of women are tainted with the “you can have it all” mentality, they think they can enjoy the lifestyle choices of modern culture without consequences and still deserve to be “treated like a lady” . Well ladies, newsflash: you can’t be a pimp and a prostitute too, you can’t be a saint and a hoe. Banks don’t hand out loans to people with bad credit scores. Christ is a redeemer, yes, if you genuinely ask for redemption, but stop pretending there aren’t consequences for your lifestyle choices. Men don’t owe you anything.
Hi Lori,
My name is Samantha Cole, I’m 21 years old, I’m not going to college nor do I plan to. My friend recommended your blog to me because I’m having a real crisis of faith and she obviously cares for me. Last year, while walking home from the market, I was attacked, robbed and assaulted. For a long time, I was very afraid of men. My fears have somewhat subsided but now, an entirely new fear has come in. How will I find a husband? How will he be able to court me if I’m afraid to be alone with him? Do I tell him about what happened or wait until he finds out on our wedding night? Either way, I don’t think a man would accept this, me.
My friends are either married or engaged to be married. What if I never will? I’ll never find a purpose. Or maybe this is my purpose and I should just get a bunch of tattoos and go to college. I don’t want to let go of my faith but what would you do if your one true goal and dream (being a mum and a housewife) might shatter completely.
Please give me some advice, I’ve tried praying but it’s yet to work.
Cast your cares upon the Lord, Samantha, for He cares for you! There are many good men and over time, you will see this to be true. Are you involved in a solid Bible believing church? If so, I encourage you to seek out a godly, older woman who will give you wise counsel. For the time being, concentrate on growing in the wisdom and the knowledge of the Lord. Understand who you are IN Christ. Rest in Him. Memorize Philippians 3 and 4. You will find rest and healing for your soul in God’s Word.
Samantha – A very good friend of mine is walking in very similar shoes to you and she has just gotten engaged to a wonderful man.
I can’t even imagine how awful it must be to fear men like that. But there are good men out there, definitely!
My friend was honest with her fiance right from the start, she explained her fear and why, and he was very understanding and patient with her. She is still afraid of men, but her fiance has been nothing but gentle and kind and patient and she grew to trust him. She met him through church.
The Gospel means exactly the opposite!
The Gospel teaches that there ARE consequences to our actions! There is forgiveness and mercy, sure, but we have to come to repentance to receive that.
Many times, I hear people declaring they are saved because they “believe” that Jesus died for them. But their actions don’t show that they are believers.
Many “Christian” women went into a rage over Lori’s post because it didn’t talk enough about the get-out-of-jail-free card that many modern women think they are entitled to! This is why I am no longer protestant/evangelical. I have more respect for the self-avowed liberal feminist who doesn’t believe in marriage because she knows traditional values are not compatible with her lifestyle. Millennial generation Christian women suffer from “you can have it all” mentality, thinking they are allowed to enjoy modern lifestyle and not take responsibility for the consequences, and then still want to be “treated like a lady”. Well ladies, newsflash: you can’t be a pimp and a prostitute too, you can’t be a saint and a hoe. Banks don’t give out loans to people with bad credit. Christ is a redeemer (if you genuinely feel sorry and genuinely want redemption), yes, but stop acting like there aren’t consequences for the choices we all make in life. Stop pretending to be something you’re not, and stop, just stop, with the attitude that men owe it to you to bail you out of jail.
I first read your blog with your “men prefer” article. It was so contrary to the teachings of the world, but had more truth in it than most anything around. I have since read your blog religiously and gone back as well. Thank you for the great work you are doing.
I grew up in my faith and remained a virgin until I got married. This was often very difficult due to aggressive young ladies trying to seduce me. I met my wife at church. Only just before we got engaged did so tell me that she wasn’t a virgin.
She met with various church officers and confessed and repented. While I was disappointed, I believed it was all ok. They told me they felt she had sincerely repented.
However, the scars from her premarital sexual activity have repeatedly been problems for over 20 years. She feels so much guilt over her premarital sexual activity that she struggles to be intimate at all, something that developed after a few years of marriage. There are so also other noticeable things that seem directly related to her premarital sex.
She rebeled against her family and God at 18 to move far away for a job and have “fun” and “freedom”. As such, her premarital sex was a logical result of many other poor choices. And since she hasn’t really repented of those choices, she hasn’t really resolved the big sin that followed.
While we are still regular church goers and believers, the damage to all of us remains.
No matter my love for her, if I could go back and tell my younger self to run away from her, I would. The damage continues more than 30 years after her youthful poor choices.
I really hope many young ladies follow your guidance, but I doubt many will. The world is so wicked and rejects God’s law and calls evil good and good evil. I teach my children how vital sexual purity is to their lives. I just hope they follow it.
There are many good people who made mistakes when they were young and God’s love is able to heal them, but there is lasting damage just like the damage an alcoholic inflicts on their own body. Just because they repent and redeem does not free of them of all the consequences of their sins.
Amen!
There are no recycled virgins, and very few truly redeemed whores who are completely repentant, despising every single bit of their former whoring. It is far more common to find women who secretly look back upon their youth and beauty, misspent on fornication, as lusting for their “glory days” again. Their hearts are far from God. They only seem to regret that they couldn’t have wasted more of their youth and beauty on fornicating with lewd men and still somehow secured a top tier husband with nothing remaining but a husk of their former desirability, soulless and empty, left to give to their unfortunate last resort spouses, whom they resent having to settle for. They only “turn back to Jesus” when the hawt bad boys refuse them, preferring to fornicate with younger hotter less used girls for free. They have no true repentance.
Let’s get real! Today Church is just how many whores “gracefully” try to reconcile their being dumped like expired meat from the sexual marketplace. They then desiccate their putrescence in the religious smokehouses hoping to interest some foolish man, blinded by the false teacher’s smoke, into buying their expired woman jerky. They’re just smoking over the fires of hell, they are not growing in sanctity and in mortification of the flesh. They didn’t chose to mortify their flesh, their flesh just got old, and now “nobody but Jesus” still wants them, but they’re only partly interested in settling for Jesus while they’re still madly in love with the world. Jesus ain’t your backup lover, He knows your heart. God will not be mocked. Seek him early, in your youth, while He may be found, before the day of repentance is gone, and you are set in your adulterous ways forever. It is a rare whore who can truly repent of her whoring.
Proverbs 30:20 Such is the way of an adulterous woman; she eateth, and wipeth her mouth, and saith, I have done no wickedness.
Amen!
Samantha, I relate to you as I am in a similar situatiuon- for me it was verbal emotional physical and sexual abuse since childhood and beyond and I am in therapy with a Godly Christian therapist who is helping me with the complex PTSD and fear of men I have. I was recently given a prophecy that when I am healed from this God has someone for me who won’t hurt me in any way. At moment I battle such a fear and anger towards men, I am asexual. I just do not know how to feel normal. But I believe the Lor dis showing me that this asexuality is not an inbuilt thing in my case, like it is for some but a result of the years of abuse starting with my own father. I do believe I am probably someoen who could live a celibate life and not mind it, but I also know deep down that I could marry if God heals me. I only realised ti sover the course of the last month or so, to be honest! God is doing much healing in me…… As I am learning,as Lori, said to “cast my cares on the Lord.” It has not been an easy ride, and am still struggling daily, but there is hope. God bless you
Hi Lori, This is off topic a bit, but I’m wondering what your thoughts are on tattoos being used in the bigger scheme of things as something to get the world ready and accepting of taking the mark of the beast for buying and selling in the end times. I mean, they are acceptable to Christian and non Christian alike now, so that when the time comes, it won’t be a big deal to get another mark on their body. I’m not trying to draw any crazy conclusions, but I am thinking that it’s another reason to steer clear of tattoos and remain set apart from the world.
Well, we know from the OT that God doesn’t like us to have any cuttings or markings on our bodies. Many will take the mark of the beast because they have hardened their hearts to the truth and have been deceived by the great deceiver.
I think the title is a no-brainer: excessive debt, a high number of sexual partners, and excessive body art are going to make a woman less, not more, attractive to the men.
With debt: every man is doing the math in his head. As soon as the first child arrives, she is going to want to stay home to nurture the child. If she has debts, then HE must cover them with his income.
With respect to sex, we need to be honest with ourselves, here: promiscuity makes a woman less, not more, attractive as marriage material. And given that–in the college world–the number of male virgins outnumbers the female virgins in both raw and percentage terms, that is sobering reality.
As for tattoos, I’ll admit that it’s a gray area. They don’t make you evil, but–depending on the type and quantity–it won’t help you with most of the guys.
(As an endurance athlete myself, I can tell you that Ironman tattoos are common among those who finish such races. Those probably won’t damage a woman’s marriage value, but excessive, showy body art is almost certainly a turn-off. In general, no tattoos is better.)
The only issue I had with your original article was this: “The husband will need to take years teaching his wife the correct way to act, think, and live since college taught them every possible way that is wrong.” (Sadly, most young Christian women wouldn’t listen to their husbands since they’ve not been taught to live in submission to their husbands. However, it’s the older women who are called to teach the younger women biblical womanhood and most husbands have never seen it modeled in their lives so they wouldn’t know what to teach.)
Let’s be honest here: neither sex is lighting up the world for Jesus right now.
From my own observations: the men need themselves to be taught how to love, act, and live in a Godly manner. They sure aren’t learning that at church, with all the half-baked and plagiarized sermons coming from the pulpits.
The men are downloading porn at such a rate that you now have men–IN THEIR 20s–who are getting married and cannot get it up with a real naked woman in the room.
The men are also racking up mountains of debt that they must take many years to pay.
And the men who are most desirable? They tend to be the “Alpha Males”, who themselves have a crap-ton of sexual baggage of their own.
Right now, as for church attendance, singles are largely falling off the map. When they graduate high school, both sexes often leave the church, but the men seem to be taking a longer time coming back. We can argue all day about why that is, but let’s be honest with ourselves: that is the situation on the ground.
Hardening of hearts to the truth and being deceived… Thankyou for this small phrase today, Lori. It really fits the sadness I’ve been feeling.
We went to a funeral for a sister-in-law, who to the best of our knowledge never received Christ as Savior. There was nothing substantial said except the few passages read on heaven, and God is love. Because she made and gave away tons of quilts and blankets, she was also showing love. Now, she’s home with God, and because God is here with us now, so is she here with us now.
I sat there thinking, how can anyone find truth in this church? But this is our relatives’ view of God… the one that makes them feel comfortable with their lifestyle choices and never being confronted with their sin and need of a Savior. I know we are called to be salt and light to the darkness, but this felt really dark and oppressive to me. We definitely were not wanted there. We went home feeling such sadness for them. My husband said that all we can do is pray and let God work. So, thank you, Lori, for being willing to be salt and light.
As a man with about 50% of his body tattooed I’ll say that theyre not something I find attractive on women. For most men at best they don’t mind them but I’ve only met two men in my life who preferred them and neither of them were on sure footing even by worldly standards. One of the primary reasons is that men get tattooed for reasons very different than why women do. For men they are very much about social status and displaying masculinity, tattoos are macho and a woman heavily tattooed is like a woman who cuts her hair off and wears flannel. If a woman is attractive it’s despite her tattoos not because of them.
I never got a tattoo because I worried I would one day regret having one or it would look awful as I aged. Under the New Testament Covenant, the association with tatoos and self mutilation being linked to ritual worship is no longe there (in the Western world at least- I cannot speak for cultures where idol worship is still an issue), however, in my spirit when I asked God about this issue, I felt He still against tattoos. It is interesting to note that in the NT, Paul does not say eating meat sacrificed to idols is forbidden per se unless we cause another believer to stumble in so doing and I guess there is a risk with tattoos, we might offend someone whose conscience is weak.
However, if God told me He does not like tattoos, then that is enough of a reason for me to never to get one. I do know a Christian who has Bible verses tattooed on herself all over and her conscience is fine with that, and she says it helps her witness to others. I can’t fault her motives, (and God does not always reveal the truth on these issues to everybody at once, so I do not judge her) but for myself I think I prefer to use a concordance! 🙂
I was/am concerned about the “men prefer” part because of I Corinthians 7. Paul said if you’re not married, you shouldn’t seek to get married, because a single woman can think more about the things of God. I suppose trying to attract men–especially godly men–is marginally better than simply trying to please oneself, but it’s still quite worldly. Scripture condemns people-pleasing. Shouldn’t our focus be on maintaining moral purity and an upright lifestyle to please GOD?
Paul does command young widows to marry, bear children, and guide the home. Not many are called to a life of singleness. Most want sex and they don’t want to live alone for God Himself said that it’s not good for man to be alone. Most women want to be married, or at least in a relationship with a man. Most women want to attract men but they won’t admit it.
I haven’t spent a lot of time with your blog, so forgive me if I’m misunderstanding you, but is this all about telling women how they can get what they want by following God? My understanding of Scripture is that God gives believers new desires, a desire for Him and His will above all else, not that we have the same desires the world has, but we gratify them differently.
God tells us that His ways are good, and acceptable, and perfect. He’s our Creator and knows the best way to live! Sin has terrible consequences, He knows this and wants to spare us from them.
The reaction to this article is just a reminder to you that—being a clearly Christian voice—the things that you do, say and teach on a public scale will be found and connected back to the Gospel. As someone who sees herself as teaching to the saved, I guess it’s a surprise to be reminded that Jesus and His work on the cross are always the main event, and the things that are taught as truth are always to be delivered in love so as not to malign His work and message. Even if you have a personal preference against disclaimers or to reach a particular subculture, you are on the internet and speaking gto the world at large. Your platform is bigger than just us young women.