A Legacy of Love

A Legacy of Love

In my book and in previous posts, I have shared how my parents didn’t get along when I was growing up. There was little harmony between them but a lot of contention instead. However, in the last few years of my mom’s life when my dad was taking care of my mom, she deeply grieved for the way she had treated my dad all those years. She grew to greatly appreciate him and saw what a kind, loving man he was as he tenderly cared for her. In fact, a few months before her death, my sisters and I were complaining about our dad (which I know is wrong) and she came out and scolded us!

One of the last conversations that I had with her, she was telling me that there was a strange man in the house and it frightened her. I asked her who it was and she told me it was my dad. She said after a few hours, she realized it was her beloved and was so heartbroken that she didn’t recognize this man that she loved so much. She died within ten days of this event so she was spared ever losing her mind completely which we are so thankful for.

In their family room, they have a huge blown up picture of all of the family with my two sisters, our husbands, our children (their grandchildren), their spouses (the last two are newly engaged so their spouses aren’t in the picture), and all of their great grandchildren. (It is also missing the many new little additions to the family since it was taken a few years ago!) They love this picture and looked at it often, exclaiming how blessed they were. When I was in high school, my mom mentioned divorcing my dad but thankfully, she never did or else this picture would have never been taken with the two of them in the center of it cuddled together. Many people at her funeral commented on the beautiful legacy she left.

Our legacy isn’t in the stuff we leave behind. No, it’s in the love we have invested in the lives of our family and those around us that we leave behind. My mom and dad have left a legacy of love. No, they didn’t have a good marriage during most of their 66 years of married life but they are both so thankful they stayed together and were blessed because of it.

My dad has told me several times that every day he has made a commitment to pray for the thirteen couples to will walk faithfully with the LORD and that their marriages will be strong until death do they part. He knows if they do, there’s a good chance that his great grandchildren will grow up to walk in truth and this is all that matters!

I know a lot of you are in difficult marriages. Do everything in your power to keep it together if at all possible. Live in submission to your husband. Don’t argue with him. Make a decision to love him through the good times and the bad times. Love is a choice and an action. Be a covenant keeper. Find your comfort and strength in the LORD; for God is love. Leave a legacy of love.

But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13:3

31 thoughts on “A Legacy of Love

  1. What a wonderful touching tribute!!! Indeed we must never take our family for granted, argue more instead of make up more. Think the worst of them until it’s too late… I’m sorry you had to go through a rougher childhood with parents that didn’t get along, but I am so glad they did make up in their final years. It should be a lesson to all of us to cherish our partner, and not wait until you’re near death. I’m not criticizing your parents in any way, please note, I’m just saying imagine if every couple who fought for years could have had those years back in love instead of in contention when they look back on their lives. We all should take that lesson to heart to love and forgive more than we scold, argue and nag our loved ones…

  2. Thank you for sharing this heartfelt legacy of love with us today, Lori. It brought a combination of smiles and a few tears to my eyes. It will be worth it all to honor our commitment to one another.?

  3. Beautiful picture! I would blessed to have one like that when I’m a grandmother. I’m very very thankful for my husband. We’ve been married 20 years and it has zoomed by. Thank you for the exhortation to be thankful and grateful for our spouses and parents.

  4. Oh, my mom had such regret in her last years for the way she treated my dad but she was able to make up for it in her last years. They were always holding hands, snuggling, and speaking kind and loving words to each other. I regret the years that I was a difficult wife to my husband but thankfully, I have had many years to make up for it! Arguing and contention should have no part in a Christian marriage since we are to pursue peace with all men, especially our husbands!

  5. It sure is, Holly! They shed many tears of joy together the last few years of their life not understanding how they could have so many blessings. They both did always love the Lord, thankfully, and were blessed because of their faithfulness. “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.” (James 1:17)

  6. Hi Lori,

    I had the flu the other day and made the mistake of trying to find something to watch on Netflix.

    I turned on ‘The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina’
    thinking it would be like the 90s tv show.

    Oh…it’s so much worse than you could imagine. I’ve seen tv devolve over the years, but this is so much more Coarse yet Psychologically Advanced.

    Here’s some things I noticed:

    – Kiernan Shipka (Sabrina) speaks with Glottal Shock in her voice…if you hear feminists speak this is a ‘thing’…it’s a ‘know it all voice’…it is an purposeful affectation because in a scene with a little boy Kiernan drops this voices and uses her real voice for the only time in the series

    – First five minutes a mention of ‘white male patriarchy’ — It’s not longer just patriarchy…it’s ‘White male patriarchy’

    -Feminism ‘Girl Power’ Everywhere

    – Mention of ‘Dark Baptism’ and ‘The Dark Lord’…Moloch Statues EVERYWHERE

    – Harvey is always put down…she constantly corrects him (then gives him a kiss like a dog)

    – Gets into a fight with every male character

    – Female actresses noticeably not beautiful…or even average…all actresses are a bit below average in the looks department…they are targeting the not-so-good-looking girls which is really sad

    It’s so insane….at this point you can watch these tv shows and play ‘Liberal Board Game’ where you advance if something in your category is shown on tv.

  7. It’s so sad the immense joy of a beautiful family in ones golden years is a rarity due to the anti family radical feminists and the culture of selfishness and materialism…

  8. Yes, this culture is a mess. Even when Jesus walked this earth, He called it a “wicked and adulterous” nation. Most in our culture hate God and His ways. We, as Christians, must continue to be salt and light; for this is what this world needs more than anything – Jesus.

  9. We can see more clearly as time goes on how much it has destroyed our cultures as it destroys the family unit. Sadly, many that are my children’s ages are no longer getting married and if they do, they aren’t having children. Even Christians have fallen for the lies of feminism.

  10. Beautiful, Lori. Your family tribute posts are the best. I still remember fondly the one you wrote for your youngest son when he turned 30. It still makes me a bit misty-eyed.

    Here’s a testimony from my own family: I have an aunt and uncle who divorced during my childhood. Neither were Christian at the time. They were estranged for a couple of years, but my uncle wanted to reconcile {he had committed adultery} and he came to my aunt seeking forgiveness. She did forgive him and took him back; they reconciled and continued in the marriage until his death just last month. After they reunited, they both became believers! They cared for one another in their old age.

    I hope this encourages your readers and lurkers. Truly, all things are possible with God! 🙂

  11. My wife once quipped, “We don’t have a family tree. We have a family woodpile.”

    Both of our parents are divorced and remarried. Our children supposedly had 8 grandparents living in 3 states. I dreaded the holidays when they were all living.

  12. I really don’t understand your last point about “female actresses noticeably not beautiful”. Would you mind elaborating? Thank you! Blessings

  13. Actresses are the most facially symmetrical of all women (symmetry = beauty)

    Movies when considered an art form or High expression of culture will only use the most beautiful women

    This is not evil or bad…when the aliens come do you want humanity represented by a Young Nicole Kidman or Lena dunham

    Movies when used as propaganda…not art…will cast whoever they want to influence

    In the case of sabrina they are purposefully trying to brainwash average and below average looking women

  14. A picture of my husband, me, and our doggy will be our only extended family picture….and our only extended family going into what I’m already terming as our “rusty years.” The first one of us that goes will be the lucky one in that the other will be totally alone. With no kids and no closeness to family, we’re it. Always will be. I honestly pray that when the Lord takes us home, he’ll take all 3 of us at the same time.

  15. I am sorry, Debby, but life rarely turns out as planned. Thankfully, you have each other for now! None of us know when our last day will be so we learn contentment in the meantime.

  16. What do recommend when the person and spouse were originally non-Christian, woman converted but no sign years later that spouse will convert ever?

  17. Keep praying, Hannah. My best friend’s dad became a believer on his death bed so he is now in eternity with the LORD. I recommend being Jesus to the unsaved spouse, pray daily, and love them. Eternity is a whole lot longer and more important than the here and now.

  18. My grandmother-in-law was in that very situation. She was the nicest person I’ve ever met, truly. She stayed by her ornery husband through multiple affairs and general bad attitude. After she died my granfather-in-law lived on several years missing her terribly. About 3 weeks before he died he was baptized. My grandmother-in-law never got to live with him on earth as a Christian but they get to spend eternity together with Jesus.

  19. Hi Lori
    This is such a powerful post. If we just push through and never give up, we will reap those rewards of a good and strong marriage. We will change for the better and soften and delight in one another more. Your family, your parents, are great examples of that, and give hope to many.
    God bless

  20. Thank you, Tracy! Love bears all things, believes all things, endures all things, hopes all things. Love never fails! Your comment reminded me of these verses.

  21. This post spoke to me so much.
    Sometimes, in these busy years of raising a family and working hard, when we’re both so tired, it’s so easy to forget why we fell in love with our spouse in the first place and only see the annoyances. It’s so easy to take to heart the unkind, grumpy words that are said on the spur of the moment. It’s so easy to dwell on these words instead of just forgetting them. It’s so easy to let bitterness and resentment build up inside of us during these years of struggle and exhaustion. And then, all we see is the bad and never the good.

    It’s so encouraging to me to hear of a couple coming out the other side, stronger in their love, and truly enjoying each other. It fills me with hope.

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