A Recovering Career Woman

A Recovering Career Woman

The following post is from a comment made by Dana on my post “They Want Me to Stop Teaching Women to Be Keepers at Home.”

This topic is near and dear to my heart. Because I refer to myself as a “recovering career woman.” I say “recovering” because much like the recovering addict, I was addicted to my career. I was addicted to my title, influence, money, nice clothes, and yes, the corner office. But when I became a Christian, and began to study God’s Word, I realized that all these things were my idols and fed my sins of pride and ego, as well.

As I became more knowledgeable about God’s Word, I realized He has a divine role for women (and men). Because His ways are perfect, I wanted that which is perfect and good!

I left my six figure “career” and embraced my new, divinely appointed career as a keeper of the home. This did not happen overnight, as I told myself all the usual excuses for declining God’s perfect career for women.

I have a college education! I’m too talented to just “stay home”! I need the money! I searched high and low for Scriptures to support my previous lifestyle. I didn’t find any. If I’m honest, REALLY honest, my ego didn’t want to give up my career.

However, once I finally made the decision, and became a full time keeper of the home, nothing could be better! Nothing in my former dog-eat-dog, back-biting corporate job compares to the joy and accomplishment of tending to my garden…both literally and figuratively. Nothing compares to the title of being my husband’s wife. When we believe God is Sovereign, we believe that ALL of his Word is Truth.

Lastly, Lori, it is because of your teaching on this site that I finally got the courage to become a full time keeper of the home. I read all your posts for months and compared them to Scripture. Thank you for what you do! I may have missed out on the best career I’ve ever had!

She looks well to the ways of her household, and eats not the bread of idleness.
Proverbs 31:27

19 thoughts on “A Recovering Career Woman

    1. Good Morning Lady of Reason,
      I should clarify that I was not “brainwashed to reject motherhood and family”.
      Not at all!
      Rather, I got sucked into the mantra that women can “have it all”!
      So I went to college, got married, had 2 kids, and stayed home with them until they started school.
      Then I actively pursued my “right” to be a productive and contributing career woman! And the chaos commenced!
      Not surprisingly, not long after, I found myself divorced.
      I admire and encourage all the younger women who are home with your families! If I had it to do over again, I would without hesitation do the same!

  1. I feel like I could’ve written this except I didn’t have a six figure income! I know the Lord guided me to your blog many years ago to learn about true Biblical womanhood and I’m forever grateful for your teaching! 7/11/14 was my last day as a working mother and I’ve never once regretted staying home. It has required sacrifice but the Lord has continued to be faithful. I truly believe being a keeper at home is the greatest job in the world!

  2. I didn’t marry until my early 30s and I can honestly say that I did not enjoy my work prior to being a wife and mom. I did it to survive but it doesn’t even compare in significance to being a wife and mom. Nothing I did during my working years brought any where near the deep satisfaction of caring for a husband, children and home. I am so happy for the author of this post that she chose to step away from her career path to be a keeper at home!

  3. Oh wow, what a gem of a post, I am smiling inside and out reading this because it is my testimony too and that of a dear friend of mine. Praise be to God Almighty who is still storming the enemy’s camp and rescuing women like us. I rejoice to hear of another woman who has been brought home. Hallelujah.

    1. Yes, Mommy Dearest…I do have the feeling of being “brought home”!

      I love how you said “God Almighty who is still storming the enemy’s camp and rescuing women like us”
      Amen! I definitely do feel rescued every day!

  4. Hi Lori,

    I watch Hallmark movies and I’ve noticed an odd trend in all the ones I’ve seen this year.

    “The getting back with an old Ex-boyfriend” Trend

    I think it’s interesting and mirroring societal trends…but which ones…or a combination?

    My theories:

    1) It’s harder to meet people in the U.S. so women are swooning over ‘Lost Loves’

    2) The message in all of the movies I’ve seen was ‘You can break up with your boyfriend for your career…and after you become rich and successful…He will come back!’

    3) Dreaming of exes destabilizes current relationships (both you and your ex)…My husband’s ex is still after 4 Years (2 married!!) creepy crawling around…I had to defriend my sister-in-law over it…I said ‘Oh no you don’t drag my husband’s ex into our lives, sister-in-law! Gone with the lot of you!’

    I think it’s mainly #2 and 1 and 3 are just bonus.

    1. I agree, Christine. Most of the women want to pursue their “dreams” (careers) instead of being in “bondage” to their wonderful boyfriends from their hometowns until they realize what they missed out on. Unfortunately, a lot of them have been married and divorced by the time they want their old boyfriends back. Not a good message to young women today.

  5. I’m with you there Emily Joy. I married in my early 30’s and so treasure the blessing of being a wife and mother more than any ‘success’ I had in my career before I met my husband and came to Christ. Nothing will ever replace the years of our children being at home with us. Nothing could ever replace the joy of training up our little ones and seeing them grow in stature and favor with the Lord.

  6. How do I respond when I find out our pastor’s wife is now working (young mom, with two children)? This is a new church to us (a few months attending as we were looking for a more Conservative church)? I don’t want to judge but I am older than her and know the hardships that will come with her working and two children needing her.

    1. It’s sadly rare to find churches where the pastor’s wife isn’t working, Gigi. I’m not sure you should confront her about it but maybe the Lord will give you a chance to someday speak truth into her life. Her children need her.

  7. What if you don’t have a husband? I would love to be a wife and homemaker, but I’m 47 and single. I have to support myself. The odds of a marriage at my age are miniscule.

  8. I don’t want to become this woman!! I am seventeen years old and about to start my senior year of high school. My future husband is 19 and we are planning to marry next June.
    As long as I can remember, I have wanted just one thing: to make a home with a husband and babies. I look forward to taking care of my family in every way and I know that I will be totally content doing so.
    Unfortunately, my soon to be husband says that that will all have to wait a couple of years for me to realize my dream. He has a job as a front end manager at a grocery store and does not make a lot of money for now. He says he will hopefully eventually get promoted to the store manager (there are a couple of levels between where he is now and store manager) but until then, he says I will have to work after we are married because I will need to contribute to living expenses. Plus, he wants to “wait” until then to start our family. I am torn. I don’t want to be disobedient but I don’t want to be out in the world with those cut throat career women, not even for a little while. My mother (I don’t have a dad in my life) says that if I feel that way I should gently end it with him and look elsewhere but I love him. I am confused. Can any of you ladies please help me?

    1. If your boyfriend cannot support a wife, and children that can blessedly and unexpectedly come from sex within marriage, then he is not ready to be married.
      If you marry someone who cannot support you, then you can find yourself in the situation in which you have to work while your baby is cared for by someone else. And if you require bed rest during pregnancy, in which you cannot work, then who will support you?
      Marrying young is a blessing, but marry someone who is ready to share that blessing with you. Your boyfriend is not ready yet.

    2. Lulu I had always grown up with the idea that I was going to be a stay at home mom and not work outside the home when I got married. That was my plan, but when we got married my husband was a college student and needed me to work until he graduated and could start working himself to support us. Life doesn’t always go the way we plan for it to, or even the way we are told it is all supposed to be, but honestly I have no regrets. If your fiance loves the Lord, and loves you, that is honestly what matter. Period. You may have to work for a few years to help support the house, but sometimes that is what being a loving wife and taking care of your home looks like. And having worked outside the home, I can say most women out there really aren’t cutthroat and mean and looking to chop you down. It will be a little rough at first to adjust to, but there are genuinely kind people out there, and it was honestly the best thing for me as far as my character and maturity go. I would encourage you to pray about it realizing that God’s plan for you may not be anything like what you thought it was, but that is the beauty of life. If you are marrying a godly loving man don’t end it just because his needs are different than what you originally thought. 🙂 Trust me, it’s worth it.

    3. Does he want the same thing as you? Does he follow God? What are his plans for if you unexpectedly have a child before he is able to support you? Talk to him about these things. Make sure you’re on the same page before you commit to marrying him! Is he putting away money now? He’s still got time. Does he spend money frivolously? Is he living like you’d want your husband to live, making choices you’d want your husband to make? I would be ok with working to help build up extra savings until you did get pregnant, but if he expects you to continue after that it sounds like you aren’t compatible!

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