My goal in writing is for women to think about their choices. I believe women have been lied to in most areas. They are taught their entire childhoods to pursue higher education and careers. They are told to use birth control and that babies/children are inconveniences. They are taught that their worth and value comes from a paycheck and how many *likes* they receive on Facebook or Instagram.
These are all lies, women. God has better plans for you! I never fell for any of these lies except the birth control one. My mom was home with me full time. She loved caring for us and making a warm and comfortable home. I loved being home with my mom and if homeschooling was popular back then, I would have absolutely wanted to be homeschooled. I hated the bullying and waste of time in public schools.
“A woman must go to college” is the first lie women are taught. I went to college because I wanted to find a husband. That’s it! If it were up to me, I would have married right out of high school since having a career held zero appeal to me. I finally met my husband during the last semester of college. I was so thankful. We met in February and married in December. However, we were taught we must wait to have children so we did. It’s one of the biggest regrets of my life.
The second lie women are taught is that they must use birth control since babies are an inconvenience. Thankfully, we didn’t wait too long and I had my first baby when I was 24 years old but I had to work the first two years of her life. This is the biggest regret of my life. There was no way I could be a good wife, mother, and have a career. I was always exhausted. All I wanted was to be home with my baby.
The third lie is that women must keep their career even after they have children. We were never created to do or have it all. I finally came home full time after I had my second baby. If you’ve read any of my thousands of posts, you probably know that we struggled in our marriage because I was always arguing with my husband (since I always thought I was right and needed to win) so this didn’t make for a peaceful home. But I did love being home full time and caring for my four children.
The fourth lie is that true love is fireworks and romance as Hollywood portrays so when we lose those feelings, we think our marriage has gone south and we must divorce. I didn’t know how to be a wife. I was never modeled it nor taught it growing up.
Thankfully, I read “Created to Be His Help Meet” by Debi Pearl when I was about 45 years old and that began the healing process to having a good marriage. I finally learned what my role was as a godly, submissive wife. It’s not always easy, but it’s good. Most of God’s commands aren’t easy but by His grace, they can be obeyed. There is much fruit in obedience to God.
Another lie women are believing is that love doesn’t last a lifetime anymore. We’ve been married going on 40 years now. We raised four children who are all married and we have eleven grandchildren. I can tell you from experience, women, that there is NO greater joy than to have children who are walking in Truth, and I am so thankful that I spent my life ministering to my family instead of having a career that can’t love me back in my older age. There’s nothing I love more than fixing a good, hearty meal for my family and having all of us around my kitchen table enjoying each other. God’s ways are absolutely perfect! Think carefully about your choices, women.
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.