Every Child Deserves to Have a Mother at Home
How have women been convinced that careers and money were more important than raising one’s own children? That it’s okay for children to be raised by strangers in day care and public schools? That it’s okay for mothers to feel guilt and be exhausted at the end of every day by trying to “do it all”? That their children don’t need a full-time mother? That besides having to make money, they still have the housework and caring for their families when they get home? That this is true freedom according to feminists?
God tells us that women are the weaker sex. He created us to be more sensitive and in tune with our feelings and emotions in order to be home with our children all day. But this doesn’t mean that we, as wise and godly women, allow our feelings and emotions to control us. He didn’t create us to be in the workforce all day, away from home and from our children. This is against our nature. He didn’t create us to do it all.
Careers and money are not more important than raising one’s own children. Careers and money aren’t eternal. Children are. Their eternal souls should be the priority in our lives. It’s not okay for children to be raised by strangers when God commands parents to raise their children in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord. The public schools sure aren’t doing this and day cares can’t possible discipline and train children in the way they should go.
The guilt mothers feel from leaving their children every day for their careers is from God. They are the ones that are called to be with their children. The guilt that full-time mothers feel for not making money is from culture and not from God. Their value is NOT in a career or paycheck. Being at home is right where the Lord wants them to be.
Women who are trying to “do it all,” aren’t doing it all. They can’t. They can’t work all day and then come home and be good wives and mothers. It’s impossible. Something always suffers and it’s most often the marriage which causes a lot of suffering for the children. Your lives at home with your children will give you plenty to do but you must know for a fact that this is God’s ordained sphere for you and that godliness with contentment is great gain. No, it’s not easy but nothing of great value ever comes easily.
Your children need you full time. Knowing that their mother is there for them will create great security for children. They will know that they are loved and cared for. That someone in the world cares enough about them to be there for them. This also creates emotional stability in them. There are so many emotionally unstable people these days because their mothers weren’t home and they never had the security of being loved and care for.
Feminists have lied to you just as Satan lied to Eve. “Hath God said…” that women are to be keepers at home, they ask. “No, it doesn’t mean you have to be home full time. It just means you have to take care of your home when you’re home,” they claim. They continue to twist Scripture to support their destructive ways. Everything that God commands for women, they twist it to mean something that God didn’t intend at all. Yes, God does want women to be keepers at home. This is to be their sphere of work and where they minister to their families. Every home is a better home when it has a woman in it caring for it and for all who enter into it. Hard-working women make homes cozy, comfortable, and inviting. Every child deserves a mother at home to love and care for them. Be that mother for your children.
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Proverbs 31:27
26 thoughts on “Every Child Deserves to Have a Mother at Home”
hello Lori! I love and have been following your writings since the always learning days!! unfortunately my husband lost his job during this covid business. he isn’t able to get a new one due to current health issues. I will be getting a job overnights while my 4 kids sleep in order to pay the bills. my husband doesn’t clean but he is a good dad and loves to cook so I feel like this might work out for us! we homeschool so at least I will be with the children during the day tho I will have to sleep a bit at some point. idk why I’m writing this except to say that we all must do the best we can, I’ve prayed for the job I’ve gotten and God answered. maybe this won’t be forever, but it will keep us going for now. thank you so much for all your blog posts I hope youre doing well
I agree with this completely, having mom at home is something that every child should have. I believe our country would be a much better place if things were still this way. I do have a question Lori, what advice would you give to someone whose husband often spends carelessly and leaves the family uncertain if necessities (electricity, clothing, etc.) will be covered? Should a woman in this position try to find some type of at home work to add a level of security or pray and trust the Lord with the outcome each month? The reason I ask, I have some at home work that I do but I sometimes find that trying to get it done leaves me without enough time (or energy) to care for the things at home that I need to do.
Thank you for your tireless reminders. Even after all these years at home and the blessings that come with them, I still get tempted to look to myself to “do it all” so I can “have it all” (or more of it). What a timely reminder.
Look at this:
https://www.theguardian.com/books/2020/aug/13/benevolent-sexism-a-feminist-comic-explains-how-it-holds-women-back
One of my dearest, closest friends works full time out of the home and her children have been brought up in day cares and public schools. She does not see anything wrong with it. I have tried to be a good example to her through our friendship but I’m afraid I’m not doing much better than she. Since my kids are home with me full time, my house is constantly trashed regardless of my tireless efforts to clean. My friend has a cleaning lady and hires everything out that needs to be done around her house and yard. Since they’re a two income family they can afford that. We are a one income family and have had to make sacrifices in order for me to stay home. One of those sacrifices is that we do not have as nice and new and clean of a home as she does. Deep down I know what I’m doing is best for my kids but it does make me feel a little defeated at times. ………..
My husband and I have struggled with infertility for 3 years, and are about to start IVF. I have never been angry about our inability to conceive naturally, or jealous of women who get pregnant easily. Our bodies are all different, and it would be a waste of my emotions (we’ve had an ectopic pregnancy and miscarriages that require medical intervention). I don’t block friends on social media when they announce their pregnancies, I don’t turn down invitations to baby showers. I’m sad for myself for the family I thought I’d have by now, but that’s all.
But recently, an acquaintance from high school posted her ‘pregnancy reveal’ on social media. She is about to graduate from medical school, as an OBGYN who strongly and passionately advocates for abortion access. This baby will be born to a mother who will take the absolute bare minimum ‘maternity leave’ and then plop them into daycare at barely a few weeks old, with absolutely zero regrets and not a single glance backwards. She’ll do her years of medical rotations, and be a full-fledged doctor by the time the child is in Kindergarten. Then she’ll go to work a demanding, rotating OBGYN schedule of nights, weekends, holidays, and constantly being on-call (because of course a first-year employee will get last choice when it comes to time off requests). Milestones will be missed, holidays, school plays, classroom volunteer time, anniversaries with her husband. But of course, the child will grow up well adjusted because they had such a strong role model trailblazer feminist mother to look up to, right?
Her pregnancy announcement was the only time I have felt real, true, physical anger at our infertility. This is not a role model, or a ‘maternal’ figure. If she had gotten pregnant in the middle of med school, that child would have been aborted because it wouldn’t be a convenient time.
I know ‘life isn’t fair,’ but this feels so unfair.
Unfortunately, the idea that women must work full-time because two incomes are needed, has affected men as well. I know very few men who are willing to struggle financially when their wives can help them out.
My husband is one such man. We’ve been lucky in that the jobs we have had, we’ve been able to juggle childcare between us and not have other people raise our children, but he absolutely expected me to work. I went back to work (part-time) when my first baby was 4 weeks old!
Part of the reason for this was that addictions cost money, but they also sapped all his motivation. I *had* to work or not only would we not eat, we would also lose our business. We’d already had one car repossessed while I was pregnant. Things were dire.
My husband was raised by a woman who worked full-time for his entire childhood (he was adopted – she was a nurse at the hospital where he was abandoned, so she carried on working after bringing him home at 6 weeks old – no time off to bond with him). She worked nights, and took care of the house during the day after she slept. She also cooked all the meals. She actually DID “do it all” but she was chronically exhausted. My husband doesn’t see that though, and because she did it all, we ALL can (and should) do it all.
This idea that women should be working too is so deeply entrenched into society that it’s not going to be easy to change attitudes. Men believe it as much as women do and women who want to be at home with their babies are thought of as “lazy”.
Most people would entertain the idea of having a mom at home but we are fighting an uphill battle. Plenty of modern women dont mind collecting children without a man and many women have kids that arent worth marrying/remarrying.
Although feminism took root in the early 70’s and women then began entering the workforce in droves, what we are seeing with all the city riots and destruction is a direct result of mother’s in the workforce. We have a generation of latch key kids being raised by parents who were latch key kids themselves. This has resulted in many young adults with little training at home, lack of respect for authority, low self esteem, lack of self discipline, a Marxist public education system leaving them with enormous student debt and a breakdown of the family unit. Sadly, these are the people who will care for the baby boomers that end up in nursing homes. A scary thought indeed.
So very true! I have “sacrificed” to be able to raise and homeschool my girls. But driving old cars and living in small spaces doesn’t feel like a sacrifice to me at all when I am able to have the amazing privilege of having my days surrounded by my children. It is life’s greatest treasure. <3
Children having their moms home to raise them is FAR more important than having a clean home, Courtney. Train your children to help you keep the home clean and tidy. This will help immensely.
Pray that the Lord shows your husband his faults and that He is better with his finances. In the meantime try to be as frugal as possible. If your kids are seriously neglected though I would see about temporary separating until he changes because your kids basic life is being harmed.
If you have a garden. Grow your own vegetables and fruit. Instead of a second car buy a greenhouse. Make children’s clothes from adult clothes. Knit jumpers for small children. Surplus fruit and vegetables can be frozen, made into jam, or in some cases sold. All the hard work in the garden will keep you slim and toned. The fresh fruit and vegetables will give you a healthy complexion. With the correct pan and thermometer, you can make sweets for the children such as toffee and fudge. I’ve known people start a small business just from making fudge. There is a long list of things you can do, which for some could include caring for other peoples children in your own home.
I don’t know about you but I’ll take a loving mother who is there for me every single time I need her over a spotless home anyday! I mean, you can certainly work on improving things, nothing wrong with that, but don’t feel like a lesser wife, mother, woman because of such a minor thing. A home can look perfect on the outside but the true meaning and value of a family lies in the relationships built and those are far better if one of the parents stays at home and invests in those relationships full time!
It’s very sad but women have been taught to value their career and paycheck over the lives of their children. It’s a tragedy and we are seeing the fruit of it in culture today. May the Lord bless your womb.
The problem is that women aren’t trustworthy, loving, or able enough to care for children. They need that sort of care and discipline themselves. That’s why multi-generational homes – with a grandfather or elderly male relative to supervise and instruct – is the absolute best.
Is IVF a Christian option? There are potential children that are lost in this process. You should consult a Church before proceeding.
And don’t judge the woman just yet. Her baby is the work of God. He has blessed hr womb in spite of her way of living.
I absolutely agree with this. I don’t have a husband or children myself (yet, God willing,) but I’ve worked in a couple of daycares and nannied for a couple of families in the past. Currently I’m a nanny for a lovely family with two kids. As much as I love being able to have a hand in their early years, I know they really need their mothers. I’m not going to be a constant in their life, I’ll be on to the next family once these two start kindergarten.
I’m grateful to the Lord for giving me the opportunity to learn and prepare for my own family. But it’s heartbreaking when I really stop and think about how these kids are growing and learning without even a parent there. I’m determined to be there for my future family.
Steven, your point of view is not biblical. Women are called to be keepers at home and mentored by other women, not men. God created women to be helpmeets, but not in obedience to any man but their husbands. Why do you think women “aren’t trustworthy, loving, or able enough to care for children.” Are you doubting God’s perfect plan for men and women? If women are not able to care for children, why do they bear them? Based on what you are saying, it would make much more sense for men to bear children. That is biologically impossible. God’s plan and rules are perfect, and He doesn’t seem to think women are not up to the task He has assingned them.
Consult a church? It seems that seeking the Lord together in prayer would be a wiser course of action. and as this couple has struggled with infertility for a while, I doubt they entered into this lightly.
I am so very grateful and honoured to be in the at home role that God designed for me as a wife and mother.God gave the responsibility to raise children to mothers and no one else.I have sacrificed nothing to be home fulltime for my children and husband. Sacrifice is to give up needs not wants. My husband’s income has been more than enough to meet every need and then some(because of God’s favor and promise to provide for our every need when we obey in tithing) To work and let someone else raise our children would be the sacrifice. I am so grateful that I’m home fulltime with my children and that I’m able to homeschool them. They know mom is always here for them. When they are sick they have comfort knowing they get to be home with mom to heal and not have to be carted off to school, daycare, baby sitter so mom can go to work.
I am a 13 year old entering 8th grade, but I love reading articles like these! I want to be ready when I am married and have kids. Thanks for creating this blog!
It is biblical. Men presided over women as intended. I’m not saying women can’t care for children at all, but that they can’t alone. They need male supervision, just as they do in all other areas of their lives, for just the reasons I mentioned.
I am a teacher and chose that profession specifically because I would be on the same ‘schedule’ as my child. My husband became disabled, so staying home longer was not an option we could manage. My child stayed in a home daycare with a loving grandma figure who is still a friend of our family. Her granddaughter and my son went through school together. Was it all ideal? No, but we are a tight knit little family of three and love Jesus. Our son is a wonderful young man and we are blessed.
Yes! Mothers away from home are decreasing Godliness and Christianity in modern day society. We are responsible for birthing children and raising them in the light of God.