Men Should Prioritize Career Women?

Men Should Prioritize Career Women?

Written By Lindsay Harold

Tomi Lahren put out a rant against men she called trash who use women, won’t commit, have several women going at once, and have no plans to make a commitment. She says she’s going to help the clueless men by telling them what women want.

She’s not entirely wrong. There are such bad men out there. However, I’m going to help the women out by telling women like Tomi what men want.

Tomi says men should be prioritizing the career women who are making something of themselves, are ambitious, have a good job, are educated, and so on. Women like her. She says women like her don’t like to be pursued by men who want a less ambitious, younger, more naive type woman who “doesn’t have anything going on.”

Well, there’s your problem, Tomi. If you want the kind of man who is looking for the kind of woman you are, you are probably going to get a player. Because the good men who want marriage and a family don’t want to play second fiddle to your career. They don’t want a woman with her own goals that don’t include them. They don’t want a woman that they have to beg and cajole to get consideration and time with her.

A good man is designed to be a leader, and that means he needs a woman who will follow him and make it her goal to encourage him and adopt his vision as her own. If she has her own vision already and is doing her own thing, sure she’s fine as arm candy or a one night stand for men who want that sort of thing, but you can’t build a life with a woman like that. Not if you want to be the leader in your own home. If a man wants to find a wife to help him carry out his mission, he needs someone who isn’t so set in her own ways and making a life that doesn’t include him.

There are two main reasons men gravitate to the innocent young thing who is 18-21. One is the obvious – looks. Youth and beauty are attractive to men. But that’s not the only reason, and probably not even the primary reason for a lot of men. The biggest draw is a woman who doesn’t have a career yet, who is flexible, who will mold her life to his rather than him trying to compete with her existing life. A woman who will follow him is a HUGE attraction. That’s the kind of woman worth marrying.

So, when a woman advertises her career, her money, her ambition, and thinks that should get her a good man who wants to settle down with her, she’s wrong. That’s what feminism told her makes her valuable, but it’s not a plus to good men. It’s a liability, not an asset. An ambitious career woman is not what attracts good men because that doesn’t meet their needs. Women are attracted to a high-powered career, money, ambition, and gravitas in a man. But men do not have the same attraction to such things in a woman. They aren’t wired that way.

Ladies, if you want a good man, be up front that you want marriage and make it known that you are willing to leave everything to follow a good man. Be flexible. Be open to change in order to make a husband your priority, not just something you fit into the nooks and crannies of your life. Otherwise, if he thinks your career is your priority, he’s probably going to conclude that there’s no room for him and no place for him to lead and move on.

But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
1 Peter 3:4

17 thoughts on “Men Should Prioritize Career Women?

  1. Wow this was spot on! Yes most men can agree a career woman is a turn off. The whole independent I can do it all by myself isn’t attractive. A man needs to lead and needs a woman to follow him.

  2. I agree with Kevin. A man needs to lead and needs a woman to follow him. Also what you said about being flexible etc,. Age shouldn’t matter, if you are obeying God you will stay that way. Sadly if they have been influenced by feminism, they find it hard to change. Also having women pastors gives the wrong impression to both men and women. I love what you have written. There is nothing better than having your husband be the leader at home.

  3. One reason my husband was interested in pursuing me was that he saw that I was very “moldable”. I was 20, lived at home but had a job, had finished high school but wasn’t going to college and had no aspirations to.

  4. If I am talking to a woman and she says anything about “her career” that is an automatic strikeout for her for me considering her as a possible wife.

    A single woman my age who has a “job” I will continue to talk with. She may be willing to be a stay at home wife, provided she is not in debt.
    I refuse to take on a woman’s debt.
    She would have to completely pay off her debts before I would marry her.

    A “career woman” has no plans to quit her career until she is ready to retire.
    Plus that career woman still has massive student loan debts from starting her career and debts from maintaining her position of status as a career woman.

    Any man that would marry her would not be even close to being her #1 priority.
    #1 Her career
    #2 Her boss
    #3 The other men she is having sex with to climb the career ladder (yes that happens to a lot of career women)

  5. “Well, there’s your problem, Tomi. If you want the kind of man who is looking for the kind of woman you are, you are probably going to get a player. Because the good men who want marriage and a family don’t want to play second fiddle to your career. They don’t want a woman with her own goals that don’t include them. They don’t want a woman that they have to beg and cajole to get consideration and time with her.”

    You could not be more right. I know that bringing up biology and the basic differences between men and women is not considered “correct”, but it is still true. Men want to protect and provide, women want to be a helpmeet, nurturing and supportive. Denying this is folly.

  6. I will add that a man’s to primary functions are provide and protect. If neither of these are needed then what purpose is the man for? If you have a career that will pay more than a man could earn them he will not be the provider. And with a woman like Tomi and many other like her, they have plenty knowledge on how to protect themselves.

    So what are you left with for men who are not needed for provision and protection? Weak momma’s boys.

  7. Just going to chime in that Tomi Lahren is an incredibly hateful, racist woman who is clearly miserable in her life so she has to make others as miserable.

  8. Yes normal men would love a woman who doesn’t have a career . The problem is there are so many men that have been so soaked in this feminist culture. They don’t understand the meaning of providing, just like a chicken that no longer has a brooding instinct. These kind of men like having the women provide for themselves because it’s too hard a life to have to provide it all. If the woman has her own living then he can work an 8 hr day, and play video games or watch tv the rest of the day. He doesn’t have to work sun up to sun down six days a week. He can have way more toys, and play golf every weekend. No overtime or working long hours for him. He’s got it made. The wife does most of the housework. It’s getting harder to find good men that are willing to provide. I am so blessed to have one.

  9. Ms. Lori I have a question What it mean that a wife mold her to his husband and if it is necessary ( is a sincere question)

  10. As usual, I enjoy and agree with your post. I can suggest “A wife after God’s own Heart, by Elizabeth George. Also “Beautiful in His Eyes” by Elizabeth George.

  11. I agree Lori but want to share my thoughts / theory as to why and how women like Tomi are finding themselves broken hearted.

    Women, in average, want to marry a man thats equal or better than them in status be it looks, status or wealth. Men could not careless about how much money a woman has.

    I think Tomi has got far in her career to the point that she would not consider just any man. I dont think she would consider a loving bus driver for example but rather someone who is at least as successful as she is. The problem with that is that the amount of men who are very successful are really small and especially in today’s society those successful men who have a lot of women chasing them have no incentive to settle down with them.

    I think your famous article “men prefer debt free virgins without tattoos” is very powerful. If she was in that position she would be in a better position to attract a man and then offer herself in marriage rather than passing over good men to be with me with lots of options. Then again a God fearing man would most likely be humble and modest so even if he was more successful than her she would not give him a chance as she would not know of his true wealth outright.

    I think Pastor Vodie Backham (sorry if I butchered his name) had it right in his series of sermons on marriage, we have fallen for the Greco-Roman myth of “following your heart” and saying weird things like “the heart wants what the heart wants” . . . .what ever that means. Scripture warns us about following our hearts.

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