Ill-Prepared to Be Wives, Mothers, and Keepers at Home

Ill-Prepared to Be Wives, Mothers, and Keepers at Home

God commands older women to teach young women to love their husbands and children and be keepers at home (Titus 2:3-5). He commands that young widows marry, bear children, and guide the home (1 Timothy 5:14). It seems to me that God’s will for young women is to marry, bear children, and guide the home, therefore, I will continue to teach this since His will is best. Most young women are very well prepared to be career women but ill-prepared to be wives, mothers, and keepers at home.

“The large percentage of career-minded woman is either a lack of scriptural understanding or a refusal to follow it. Either way this is not a financial, psychological, emotional or societal problem, but a spiritual issue. I believe if we return to the Lord and follow His ways, we will see many changes for good and chief among those will be our women staying home. Not from a government law, but in obedience to the law written in their hearts. Not from men demanding it, but from the God-given intelligence they know this is God’s best for them, for their husband, and for their children.

“Look simply to our current society. Has there ever been a time when people don’t know how to act, how to treat others, or how to take care of themselves? Is there not a correlation between our society sinking to an all time low and mothers leaving the home? I will always believe women are the best thing God ever created. Unfortunately, too many have chosen to sacrifice the eternal on the alter of the temporary.” (Tim Keller)

Culture and the churches are telling young women to pursue a higher education and a career. This is all young girls hear from the time they are young. Few, if any, are teaching them the value of being wives, mothers, and keepers at home. Most older women are certainly not teaching young women to be keepers at home. If they were, what I write wouldn’t be so foreign and disgusting to so many.

Many worry about living on one income, yet many families are living on one income. Don’t believe the lies being promoted that this isn’t attainable. God tells us that His commands are not burdensome and with Him ALL things are possible. Step out in faith and trust Him. After all, He is our provider!

If someone tries to convince you that being home full time is extremely isolating and lonely at times, having a career can be extremely isolating and lonely at times too. Our lives aren’t about our comfort but about loving and obeying God even when it’s isolating and lonely. You are doing Kingdom work! You are working for God Almighty and raising up godly offspring for Him. NOTHING can be more important than this. THIS is the message that young women need to hear.

For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous.
1 John 5:3

11 thoughts on “Ill-Prepared to Be Wives, Mothers, and Keepers at Home

  1. My mom was a SAHM all my life, she had six kids and only went to work after the last one graduated high school. She never really acted like she wanted me to stay home or work, and I wish she would have taught me more, and I also wish I would have wanted to learn more as well. I was the only girl, however, it was pushed on me by family to go to college to “make something of myself”. Even had family offer to pay for it. Looking back now, so glad I didn’t because it would have been a waste. I worked for the first 4-5 years of our marriage and always said I wouldn’t put the burden of providing onto just my husband, then the baby came along and we both wanted me at home. We went through a couple part time jobs, but finally got to where I was able to just come home. And look, we had an awesome older lady that watched our child and she loved him very much, there was absolutely no doubt that he was being taken care of, but my husband said he wanted me home raising him.

  2. One of the bright spots of this “stay at home” lockdown in my state is that my family is beginning to truly appreciate all that I do as a homemaker. From homemade sourdough bread to delicious soups made from homemade starter to a homemade dessert, clean laundry, floors, bathrooms, sewing face masks, waking early to get breakfast prepared, coffee ready, stretching the food we have creatively, keeping a cheerful outlook, encouraging exercise, working in the garden, and spending time with family. I am busy from morning to night. My family no longer thinks that staying home means that I spend my days watching TV or taking long naps. They appreciate my hard work now (which I always did, but it went unseen in a house empty of other family members during the day). Two family members have dropped 15 pounds. One told me that he was surprised that he got full enough on homemade food that he was eating less and still feeling satisfied. Homemade means real ingredients, healthy vegetables, spices, meat. No additives, less salt needed due to flavorful herbs, and plenty of fiber and nutrients. Much healthier than fast food.

    1. You are an encouragement, Kande!
      I find that I’m either on top of keeping a clean house, laundry’s caught up, or family dinners are from scratch-but not all three at the same time, lol!
      Your family is blessed by your efforts and I’m glad they’re appreciating you!

      1. i feel the same way! hard to do 3 at same time 🙂 I learned from my mother in law not to expect the house to be so tidy/clean that it’s not able to be enjoyed. we were went to live and use our home spaces. instead she set to have certain areas that are always kept and maintained. so when that laundry pile can’t be put up just yet, there’s other areas that people can rest in without clutter etc. she helped me find peace while i continue to do all im called to.

  3. One of my favorite quotes is from Thomas Moore, “The ordinary arts we practice every day at home are of more importance to the soul than their simplicity might suggest.”

    Living on one income is more doable than most women realize. The amazing thing is, that when we ask God to show us how, He does!

    When we work outside the home, we give our paycheck the glory for getting us the things we need.

    When we focus on our work in the home, our husband gets our appreciation and respect, and God gets the glory.

    New ways of living, that you never could have imagined, will unfold before you as you lean on Him.

  4. thanks for this post. it is all so true. not much has changed as we have always homeschooled and dh has been working from home for years. oldest son is loving being able to do college online instead of driving in. hope everyone is learning to enjoy family time and consider what commitments thy want to allow into their lives.

  5. I’m seeing a trend for our older women and men. The godly, wise and experienced are heading to live their retirement years in Christian communities with other people their own age. We visited a friend in one such place, and there’s tons of activities and outings to keep them busy. This one had Bible studies galore and a church on campus. At first, we thought it was such a nice arrangement for our friend, but then it made me feel sad. All of these older individuals that could be such a blessing to their families and churches are deciding to spend their remaining lives away from their children and grandchildren. Everyone’s circumstances are different, but I really don’t see any biblical support for these types of places. So, it’s not only the fact that the older aren’t teaching the younger, but also that they are choosing to live in the retirement places or getting put into nursing homes. They aren’t even around to get counsel from. Our Christian society is really messed up in this area.

  6. There are career fairs held over here every year. Various companies and professions set up tents and tables and students go from one to the other learning about what it takes to get into each area of expertise. There are demos, sponsored competitions, food stands and decorations and it’s always a big affair. We have girls only as well as boys only secondary schools and co-ed schools in attendance for a period of a week.

    I’m always struck by the fact that there is never a tent/table for marriage, motherhood and homemaking (MMH). I know that it would be a breath of fresh air because majority of the girls in their mid to late teens don’t know that this option is available and positively valid. Many of the boys would also do well to ponder the advantages of considering a future as a single income earner in their homes. I certainly never considered it at that age. After all, feminism claims to be all about choice so why aren’t all available choices equally presented? I’m seriously considering making inquiries into settings up an MMH table next time around. It’s possible I’ll be heckled but I am willing to try. First I’ll pray about it and then run it by my husband 🙏🏼

  7. Hi! I have been reading and deeply enjoying many of your posts and archives. I was wondering if you or anyone reading would have any suggestions for specifically homemaking/housekeeping AUDIO format like podcasts or audiobooks? It seems so much of the advice today is basically to not worry about housework while you have young children BUT I really believe they need a clean, well run, somewhat predictable home life- in addition to an attentive, loving Mama/wife.

    1. Clean Mama on Instagram is GREAT! She gives a schedule of what to do each day. Children need to grow up in a clean and orderly environment. As the children grow older, teach them to help and clean up after themselves. It teaches them self-discipline and will be a benefit to them all of their lives.

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