Women Flagrantly Refusing to Submit

Women Flagrantly Refusing to Submit

From a comment on Are Wives in Submission to Their Husbands Inferior?

I grew up seeing two generations of women flagrantly refusing to submit, and the effects on their marriages was disastrous. No unity, no sweet companionship, but a very them (men) vs. us (women) mentality. And both men were God-fearing, good men who could never do anything right in their wives’ eyes. That just made me all the more ready to respect and submit to my husband when the time came. Why not stop the generations of sin?!

What’s presented in the Bible is such a gracious, complementing, honoring, and beautiful thing. Submission is only hard because we don’t wish to be humble, or held accountable, or willing to put someone else’s wishes above ourselves: pride and selfishness, to be exact. And sometimes a husband is not perfect (well, never until heaven).

Submission is not about feeling good about my place in life, but it’s about my obedience to God. Am I willing to throw it all in and do what He has commanded me to do, being obedient and reaping his rewards (husband’s praise and children calling her blessed)? Or am I hardened and disobedient, wreaking havoc around me? Are there hard days? Yes. And yes. And yes. Then, I wrestle with God and His Word, until I’m back in submission, ultimately asking Him to teach me to love and submit better.

But, do you know how amazing it is to trust in our Creator? That taking a submissive role/a servant’s role (because the greatest of these will be the least and least will be the greatest) opens up a peace that can’t be explained. That quiet, knowingness that I am doing God’s will is priceless. It’s taken years for it to be as easy as breathing, and it will continue to take years for me to master it.

Have I seen the blessings? Most certainly. My husband regularly tells me he couldn’t live without me and my kids tell me I’m the best mom ever. So even when I’m asking my honey what he wants to eat this week and making my menu around his likes, or when I ask him if there’s anything I can do for him today, or when I make sure I pass all decisions through him because that’s what he’s asked me to do, none of this is unreasonable. And it’s not about him ‘winning’ or me ‘winning’, or me feeling oppressed (and I don’t, ever. Isn’t that amazing!). It’s obedience to God. I know I’m doing His work and being a submissive servant. And it is so good.

Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Ephesians 5:24

36 thoughts on “Women Flagrantly Refusing to Submit

  1. This is a great post, Lori! Thank you for sharing this with us.

    You’re right about seeing the blessings. You do reap what you sow. Ever since my husband and I got married, I lovingly submitted to the will of the Lord Jesus and the headship of my husband.

    It’s really not about winning or who’s being right but seeing the fruit that you’re bearing and rewards you are gaining both here on earth and on heaven.

    There are times we women may have a tendency to answer back or even trying to prove something right to our husbands but then if we reflect and ask ourselves, ‘Is this what the Holy Spirit teaching us?’ or ‘Am I portraying a meek, quite and submissive spirit to my head?’ we then tend to think twice before we speak or even do a move.

    Both my husband and I have seen the joys and rewards of God’s design of a marriage and it is a pure joy.

    It’s all about renewing our minds with the word of God and transforming into a Christ-like being.


  2. I sure can understand a woman’s reluctance to follow her husband’s lead because the world would have you believe submission is a dirty word. It’s actually quite the opposite. A question to ask yourself is when there genuine peace in your home what is happening??? A husband leading his family gently lovingly and being a good loyal servant to Christ!! And the wife being a good loyal servant to Christ!!!

    If wives who refuse to follow there husband’s lead because it’s just to hard and they justify that sin because if this then they aren’t following scripture. If a husband is being a bully or leading in anyway that would be not honoring to God then that’s sinful too.

    Regardless of all our circumstances, I think it’s safe to say we all want happiness and a home that’s brings honor and glory to Jesus then shouldn’t we be listening to what we are commanded to do?

    My wife says a lot she struggles with submission because she feels it makes her feel like a child
    And I remind her that as we live out our faith it’s about being obedient to god not me!!! God would never ask us to do something that would be deemed detrimental or harmful to us

  3. Thanks for sharing Rob. I understand your wife’s sentiments. And thank you for your insightful answer.God bless.

  4. Rebellious wives use every excuse in the world for why they CAN not or WILL not submit to their husbands. They can make all the excuses they want. They can call it anything they wish. God calls it SIN.

    If you are a wife who calls herself a Christian yet refuses to submit (in everything) to your husband then you are living in SIN. It’s just that simple. Quit thinking you are holy, your not. Quit thinking you are Godly, you’re anything but. Quit thinking you are serving Christ; He is not fooled, the only person you are fooling…. is yourself.

    If you do not live daily in complete submission to your husband, what you’re really doing is blaspheming, maligning, bringing shame upon, reviling, discrediting, dishonoring, and slandering the Word of God. Do you call yourself a Christian woman? Then quit making excuses and start obeying the God you claim to know, love and serve.

    Do you really think that you know Jesus Christ? (1 John 2:3) says “We know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands.”

    What does God command of wives? Read for yourself. (Titus 2:3-5) says “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”

    Not convinced? How about this one. (Colossians 3:18) “Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.”

    Think that you don’t have to submit to your husband because he is lost or because he is not living as holy as you think he should be? God knew you would try and use that excuse. (1 Peter 3:1-2) “In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.”

    Still not clear enough? God really spells it out here. (Ephesians 5:22-24) “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” Do you see that ladies, God not only commands you to submit to your husband, He commands you to submit to your husband in EVERY THING.

    You see what God commands you to do. Do you really know him?

    Are you claiming that you love God but still refusing to submit to your husband? (John 14:15) says “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.”

    Do you consider Christ the Lord of your life yet still not submit to your husband? (Luke 6:46) says “Why do you call me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ and do not do what I say?”

    I don’t want to come across so harsh but seriously… God only speaks directly to wives in a few places in the Bible and in almost every place, He instructs (commands) them to submit to their husbands. How can any wife call herself a Christian while refusing to obey the PRIMARY command that God gives her? I would submit that she can’t.

  5. Rob,

    God wouldn’t ask us to do something that would be detrimental or harmful? Interesting….


    I think you forgot about not submitting if wives think their christian husbands are sinning or asking their wives to sin. You know…. Like being intimate when the wife doesn’t feel like it, or not to spend money. If she doesn’t respect her husband, she doesn’t have to submit because if he wanted her to submit, he would know how to earn her respect.

  6. Nowhere in Scripture does it say that the husband is to be the head or leader or authority of the house or household. It does, however, say that the husband is the head of the wife. In Hellenistic Greek (of which New Testament Greek is a subset), “head” rarely has the metaphorical meaning of “leader” or “authority”. There are several Greek words for “leader” or “authority” in the New Testament, yet these words are *never* used for husbands.

  7. The command to the husband is to selflessly and sacrificially love and care for his wife. (Eph 5:25, 28, 33a; Col 3:19).To love your wife as your own body, which is taught in Ephesians, is to love her as your equal, not someone walking behind you or being trod underfoot. I value my wife’s input and views. She sees such a different side to things than I do and our home and family is stronger for our combined forces. Every follower of Jesus Christ, regardless of gender, race, social or church position, should endeavour to live in submissive harmony with others. Jesus exemplified this submission and humility during his earthly mission. Our aim should be to intentionally follow Christ’s example found in Philippians 2:3-8.

    20+ years together and we have yet to have even a major argument. I cannot imagine life without her. She is my best friend & companion in all things. I can’t ever get enough of spending time with her.

  8. Thank you Jeff,

    Regarding wives not respecting their husbands, respect goes hand-in-hand with submission and God speaks very clearly to that issue as well.

    Ladies, it is not up to a husband to “earn” the respect of his wife. Just as God commands husbands to love (agape) their wives, (this means that a husband is to always “choose” to act in his wife’s best interest, showing her benevolence and good will) whether she deserves it (or whether he feels like it) or not, God commands wives to submit to their husbands (in everything) AND HE says that “the wife must respect her husband”. Let’s look at the entire set of instructions that Paul gives in Ephesians 5 regarding the marriage relationship (i.e. verse 32 – The earthly representation of the relationship between Christ and the church.).

    Ephesians 5:22-33 (NIV): “22Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

    Paul ends this set of instructions (explaining how a marriage between a man and a woman here on earth is to be a representation of the relationship between Christ and the church) in verse 33 with “…the wife MUST respect her husband”.

    The word translated here as “respect” is the Greek word “phobeo” (fob-eh’-o) and it literally means “to put to flight, to terrify, frighten”. The proper definition (from Strong’s Concordance) is: “I fear, dread, reverence, am afraid, terrified”. There are a lot of other words that Paul could have used here, so the use of this particular word is significant and once you see this whole passage for what it truly says, it fits right in perfectly.

    I don’t see how it should be that a wife is to be so terrified of her husband that she runs away from him. I think what makes more sense (in this context), is this: just as Christians are to have a healthy “fear” of the Lord, a wife should also have a healthy “fear” of the position of authority that God has assigned to her husband (as her head). What does this kind of “fear” look like? Many of the translations use the word “respect”, but the way that most of us see the word “respect” these days, just does not seem to accurately convey the meaning of the Greek word “phobeo” that Paul used. Since the King James Version uses the word “reverence”, let’s look at what “reverence” means.

    Webster1828 defines reverence as “Fear mingled with respect and esteem; veneration.”
    and veneration is defined as “The highest degree of respect and reverence; respect mingled with some degree of awe; a feeling or sentiment excited by the dignity and superiority of a person…”.

    If you consider the context and put all of that together, it seems to me that Paul is telling a wife that she must treat her husband (the position of authority that God has placed him in as her head) with the fear, honor and esteem that is due a superior.

    Now ladies, we husbands know that we are all sinners (just like you) and that we do not deserve to be reverenced (in and of ourselves) but God says that you “MUST” do it anyway. Just as in the military, a soldier salutes, shows respect to, and obeys the orders of the one who is in authority over him/her, (they are showing deference to the higher rank), God tells wives that He has put their husbands in authority over them and that they are to show their husbands that same sort of respect (fear, reverence, deference) because of their higher rank.

    Again, when it comes to the instructions given to you in God’s Word, there is no excuse. Satan tries to convince women to act according to their feelings. God commands you to act in obedience to what is written in His word. If you say you know God, then you will know that you know Him because you are obeying his commands. If you say that you love God, then you will be showing Him that love by obeying His commands. Do you claim that Jesus Christ is the Lord of your life? If He is, you will be demonstrating that to Him and all of the world as you… obey His commands. If you do not obey His commands, you are demonstrating (to God and all of the world) just the opposite.

  9. Paul,

    Are you a new christian? From all commentaries you hear or read submission in Ephesians is used in the military definition. This would mean that one person is head/leader/authority. The other is in submission.

    Of course your wife is to be a helpmeet. Only a tyranical leader would not want help from those under his authority. When he goes into battle and does not heed the advice or opinion from those under their authority, they might have knowledge that he doesn’t have. To ignore that is unwise. On the flip side of that, if the subordinate is always arguing and disrespecting the leader, then those around lose respect for their leader as well and can ruin any military regiment. This will also ruin a marriage whether they stay together or not.

    Oh, by the way. No where in the bible does it say the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are one or Trinity. Ignoring the obvious facts are detrimental to following His Word.

  10. Paul W.
    Feminism has corrupted you as seen by your egalitarian views expressed above.

    Man is indeed intended to be in authority over the woman. That is shown throughout the Bible in many places. The very first place was in the creation account. If God intended for man and woman to be equal, He would have created Adam and Eve out of the dust of the earth, introduced them to each other and told them to work together in ruling over His creation. It did not happen that way and for that reason alone (there are many more) God demonstrates that he intended for man to have authority over the woman.

    Paul says in 1 Cor. 11:7-9, “For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; for indeed man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake.”

    Throughout his writings, Paul makes it clear that authority is a huge issue with him and in these verses, he ties authority in with the created ORDER. Paul says a woman is to have a symbol of authority upon her. Why? Because Adam was created first. If God wanted Woman to be in charge, He would have created her first. If God wanted them to be equal, He would have created them at the same time.

    Also, the fact that God showed that Adam had dominion and authority over the animals by allowing Adam to name them. In the same way, God showed that Adam had authority over Eve by allowing Adam to name her. He first classified her as “woman” (meaning from the man) then after the fall, he named her Eve.

    See what I wrote below about a woman and respect to understand what Ephesians 5 really means.

  11. Hi Paul W.,

    I would echo Tim Chalies’ words which in turn echos most of most of Christendom throughout the ages on this theological matter. Don’t you find it interesting that this new idea that “head” does not mean leader, and Christian husbands are not to be leader has only appeared in this modern age of feminism? That for 2000 years the church has been clear on the matter since the time of Christ, yet somehow you and the new band of “equality” proponents have found that God’s Word means something different then the church has taught since the beginning of its inception?

    Chalies writes: “Male headship is taught so clearly in Scripture that to deny it leaves us prone to fall into any number of other radically false teachings. If we can read the Bible and walk away denying male headship, we can walk away denying any doctrine that offends our sensibilities.” https://www.challies.com/christian-living/leadership-in-the-home-a-godly-man-leads

    Tim goes on to explain how a Christian husband is to lead, and in doing so covers many points where we can unite together in our thinking when you write: “The command to the husband is to selflessly and sacrificially love and care for his wife. (Eph 5:25, 28, 33a; Col 3:19).To love your wife as your own body, which is taught in Ephesians, is to love her as your equal, not someone walking behind you or being trod underfoot.”

    My wife is not my equal as I make it my goal to out love her, our serve her, and I sacrifice more for her. I think you would agree that this is what it means to be like Christ to our wives.

    But there is where the analogy must end for you because you are unwilling to be “like Christ in the many other areas that Christ is to His church.” Is Christ some wimpy wallflower who loves us so much that we can do no wrong, or does He through His Spirit admonish and correct us, even discipline us for our own sake?

    Is Christ as head of the church just its source and not its leader? I think you will be hard pressed to say that Christ’s sacrificial death on the cross was just out of love, as it was one of the greatest leadership acts ever performed. For in it He earned the right to be called not just our Savior but our Lord.

    How does one explain that a wife is to “submit to her husband in everything” if He is not leading? Hupotasso (to submit) is not hard to understand. It is a wife willfully placing herself under her husband’s leadership as one does in military order, private to sergeant, sergeant to lieutenant and lieutenant to Major… It was predominantly a military word. So if a wife is to place herself under her husband… how else can one read but that he is to lead her?

    Peter goes on to give an example of what this submission looks like when he talks about the obedience of Sarah and how she called Abraham, her husband Lord. I will not go into what Lord means, but it is the highest of authority and leadership.

    So yes, husbands as they lead must do so in a way that Christ leads, out of pure unselfish love for their wives. But yo are way off base when you think that husband leadership is not taught in the Bible. It is best to give that up and focus your attention on the part that is also true, that the way a husband leads must conform to the sacrificial love of Christ. Not to be leader, as this is a God given role given to all Christian husbands, but to lead well, especially when we have a woman we love so dearly to be sure we show her the love and respect she deserves. And to show love even when she is rebellious, but to do so “as Christ loves His church.”

    You get to decide how to lead your wife, but you don’t get to decide if you are to be her leader. God has already spoken on that matter and far to many husbands abdicate this role as they prefer their wives to lead, violating many of God’s ideals and turning their marriage into something harmful for their kids to see as their model. Then they wonder why things fall apart in the next generation.

    My Dad would say the same thing about never having an argument with either my Mom, (who died), and his second wife. He is a natural leader and he married two wives who by personality are natural followers. So never an argument. But what about the husband who is the natural leader married to a wife who also has a personality of a leader, like in my marriage? Here is where it can make a big difference doing things God’s ways and save on many arguments and upsets. I try to please my wife and I am not demanding, but I also an not going to let her run me over with her thoughts and desires. It is in the disagreements that I have to step in and choose which way to go, and she joyfully follows,(although the joy may not be there at first :). I often conceded to her ideas and desires sacrificing my own, but if I always did what she wanted I would be giving in to wrong things and not leading.

    There is lots of peace doing things God’s ways, and really nothing to fear. You are dead wrong on the often falsely perpetuated idea that husband leadership means, “someone walking behind you or being trod underfoot.” Stand up and lead your wife, if you are not already and just can’t see it. Why would your loving leadership do anything to harm her or to make her feel lesser than you? Can you not see that being the leader and loving her as Christ loves the Church are not mutually exclusive, but actually the best way you can love her if she is willingly following? It’s God’s ideal and the best of both worlds, and nothing to fear when doing things God’s ways.

  12. Paul W,

    So I suppose by your logic, that Christ is not supposed to “lead” or be in “authority” over the church? Are you trying to tell me that the church is not supposed to follow, submit to, and obey Christ?

    Ephesians 5:23 says: “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church…”

    Ephesians 5:22-33 is Paul teaching us that the marriage relationship between a man and a woman here on earth is to be a picture, a representation of the relationship between Christ and the church. Are you trying to tell us that Christ and the church are equals?

    You are right, he could have used other Greek words, but the one he did use, in that context, is clear enough.

  13. Excellence Trey! God’s ways are always best, and certainly some want to abuse the word on both sides… husbands who want to lead with out love and wives who refuse to submit and respect until they “feel love” or “feel” it is something they can agree with their husband on. Many Christian women are very submissive in everything the agree with their husbands about… then argumentative and defiant one the rest LOL. They refuse to willfully submit and generously love and respect.

    Certainly the biggest burden is on the Christian husband to get his leadership matched up with Christ, but if a wife is waiting for her husband to be like Christ before she submits she is being disobedient to God’s Word in many places and ways. Actually, she is to win such a husband over to improved and better love and leadership by her own display of chaste, godly and submissive behavior.

  14. I am not in any form a new believer. But have been a student of the original languages, context and culture of the scriptures for many years as well as a long time servant in ministry. I have however hung around here long enough to know that commenters here don’t listen to opinions differing from their own so I will bow out now.

    Oh, by the way. I never mentioned the Trinity so I’m not sure what bearing this has on the conversation

  15. I have a post coming out on Wednesday about reverencing our husbands using the definition from the 1828 Dictionary, Trey, since I believe most of us have no idea what this looks like or how to exactly reverence our husbands.

  16. Ken,
    Why not go into what the word “lord” means in 1 Peter 3:6. It is another perfect example.

    Peter could have used a lot of words there but he choose this one. The word translated there as “lord” is the Greek word “kurios”.

    The below is copied directly from Strong’s Concordance

    kurious: lord, master
    Original Word: κύριος, ου, ὁ
    Part of Speech: Noun, Masculine
    Transliteration: kurios
    Phonetic Spelling: (koo’-ree-os)
    Short Definition: lord, Lord, master, sir
    Definition: lord, master, sir; the Lord.

    HELPS Word-studies
    2962 kýrios – properly, a person exercising absolute ownership rights; lord (Lord).
    [In the papyri, 2962 (kýrios) likewise denotes an owner (master) exercising full rights.]

  17. Again, nowhere in scripture does it say husbands are to be the spiritual authority over their wives or to be leading them. Christ is our spiritual authority. Chapter and verse please. It just isn’t there.

    If you want to go by creation order, Trey, then the animals should be in authority over us. 🙂

    The original text do not support a hierarchal order.
    I’m fixing to board a plan for work so I don’t have time to debate this. But if you care to research it there is much information available now.

    My wife is not a natural follower. She has equally as strong a personality as I do. We work every decision out together. We pray everything through and if we can’t come to an agreement then we know one or both of us isn’t hearing from God and we keep praying and discussing it. I’m very well aware of how authority and leadership works, being in the military and coming from a military family. I just have no desire for my marriage to be run like that. My position comes from years of careful study and praying and being led by the Lord. If you don’t agree that is fine. This is not an essential doctrine and has no bearing on salvation, and we have freedom to agree or disagree.

    With that I am bowing out, as I am traveling for the next few weeks for work and will not have access to internet.

  18. The word submit in verse 22 isn’t even in the original text. It was added later by the translators. Verses 22 and onward are supposed to be the continuation of verse 21.

  19. Paul,

    My apologies, I wasn’t clear. You had stated that leader, head, authority wasn’t in the bible. I disagree, but what I meant was that Trinity is not in the bible either.

    It’s not about you, me and others agreeing to disagree or agree. It’s about proper interpretation of God’s Word… Christ Jesus.

    Ken has corrected me and so has David (haven’t seen him here in a while).
    Proverbs 9:9 and 12:1, 19:20-29.

    Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Start there.

  20. Paul W,
    You are correct. Verse 21 speaks of submission to the body of Christ in general, verse 22 is where Paul continues with submission and how the wife is to apply it specifically in her relationship with her husband.

    Regarding the fact that you have no desired for your “marriage to be run like that”, but rather you have found something that has “worked” for you, God is not really interested in what we like or don’t like. He is also not in the least bit interested that we find something that “works” for us. What He is interested in is our obedience to His word.

    1 Samuel 15 is a perfect example. Saul found something that seemed to “work” for him but it caused God to regret that he had ever made Saul king. Why? Because God had given Saul specific instructions and Saul chose not to follow them but rather he found something that he was more comfortable with; something that “worked” better for him.

    This is what Samuel said to Saul:
    “Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the Lord? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams. For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the Lord, he has rejected you as king.”

    It is just as well that you are getting on a plane. It’s clear that we will not agree on this but as Ken noted, the position that you are taking is relatively new and the product of the poison of feminism that has infected our world and the church as well.

    I do however, want to thank you for your service.

  21. Yes Paul, but I would challenge you to find any Greek scholar or Biblical scholar who would not link the verb submit of verse 1 to verse 2. This is common in the Greek language of the New Testament. If no verb or modifier exists then look back to the previous one.

    Even if you could exclude submission from Eph. 5:2 you cannot from Col. 3:18 “wives submit yourselves” and 1 Peter 3:1 “wives submit to your own husbands” which makes it abundantly clear. It is terrific that the most important things of God’s Word and will are repeated multiple times in various ways. Husband leadership can be found at least 12 times in the New Testament and probably 100 times in the Old Testament. Te BIble is pretty clear on this matter and put all together from the many times written, crystal clear.

    I am curious in your own marriage what you fear by being the leader? If God says your wife is to “hupotasso” “submit to” you, why not assume that when you have things that tug on your heart, areas of disagreement, that you need to speak up and speak out in a leadership way on them. Your wife can still disagree and may not follow your leadership, but why not step up to the plate and play out your God giiven role? You won’t be perfect in it, but certainly when you two always compromise it won’t be the right decision all the time either. For that matter, it is quite possible that you could have a much better marriage and might earn more respect from your wife if you would just say, “Honey, God is asking me to take leadership of our marriage and I don’t see much changing in the way we respond to each other as I am not the bossy type, and I always want to put you first. But ther are times, although not many, that I feel strongly that we should be doing something that compromise cannot achieve, and in those cases I would like to think you would respect me and my decision making enough to submit to me. Here are three examples of what I am talking about and want to try dfferently…. x, y, z. If God says this is best, what do we have to lose by trying it and seeing how God may bless us?”

    Good luck to you on your journey to godlinesss and doing things God’s ways.

  22. While some of this do have valid point.. I will like to understand..if God says that the husband and wive will become one flesh,one body…doesnt it means that both partner need to serve and submit to each other has there arent two different people but one now ?..Doesnt this have some contradiction?. Jesus, even as the head of the church showed submissive examples by washing the feet of his disciples. Jesus mainfested himself after his resurrection not to a man but to a women so she could Prophecy to others (men included) that he has indeed resurected.

  23. Not according to the Word, Mrs. Williams. Jesus wasn’t submissive in either of the examples you gave. He was a servant but He didn’t “submit to” or “obey” anyone in either of them as wives are clearly told to do over and over again in the Word. Jesus submitted to His Father only for this was the work He came to do. The Church is commanded to submit to Him.

  24. Thank you for this wonderful webpage, I am so impressed with every word I have read. It is so good to learn that true Christian ladies do exist.

    I am a 54yrs old eligible mature Christian man who has had many opportunities to be married and thankfully still do have some options.

    The reason I have not gotten married is because my eyes are wide open on this issue and plainly cannot find a Biblical Christian lady that resembles the character to be a Biblical wife. There is even a scarcity of Christian ladies who have any desire to cook yet alone made any preparations to care for the future children they desire so much.

    I’m healthy, attractive, financially secure and have been involved in ministry a number of years since receiving Jesus at age 20..

    All in all it is quite sad to be persecuted by women and Christian women who put me down for expecting a Biblical wife!

    I think I have now given up altogether the thoughts of getting married…


  25. Jeff . God’s commands to wives are not dependant on the husband’s behavior…and vice versa.

    Also, regarding intimacy, go read 1st Corinthians all the way through. That way, you’ll have context and see clearly that no exceptions are given regarding the husband’s and wife’s mutual intimacy obligations. I say this in advance, because some people cite exceptions and limitations that simply aren’t in the text.

  26. And apparently very humble in the way you described yourself.self praise is never a good recommendation.

  27. Thank you for speaking on unpopular issues. It refreshes the soul and encourages the heart.

    As for God, his way is perfect:
    The LORD’s word is flawless;
    he shields all who take refuge in him. ~Psalm30:18

    In Christ,
    Ann Kapala, Apple Valley, MN

  28. If a wife does not treat her husband as a leader then NOBODY will. He will go into the world each day feeling defeated and overwhelmed. Other men (and the devils men) will see this and take charge of him as they will see him as a submissive non-leader. He will then be under their influence and direction. To defeat the devil and this harsh world Christian men MUST be the leaders wherever they are, especially at home because this is where it all begins. Wives need to build up strong Christian leaders FOR GOD. This is so important for Christians to remain free and leading the world to God.

    Husbands MUST be loving or the same will happen to their wives. Nobody else including their children will love them either. We all have a responsibility to BUILD UP each other in a way the protects us from the evil one. Show respect and love. Amen!

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