Things Women Can’t Stand About Living With Men

Things Women Can’t Stand About Living With Men

There’s an article about five things women can’t stand about living with men and of course, it’s about living with them, not being married to them since marriage is out of date these days and so old-fashioned. I thought it would be interesting to go through these five things that women can’t seem to stand about living with men.

1. Throwing things on the floor and leaving them there.
2. Leaving a dirty bathroom sink and toilet splashes
3. Not enough space for everything
4. Dirty dishes
5. Taking too long to do anything

Do you see that most of them have to do with housekeeping?! This is why my simple handwritten post about housework went viral (shown below)! Women don’t want to have to clean up after their husband/boyfriend (living with a boyfriend is living in sin). This is how marriage is supposed to work, right? He cleans up after himself and I clean up after myself.

No, this isn’t how it’s supposed to work! Yes, according to our culture and “equality” it is but not in God’s economy. He created the wife to be the husband’s help meet and to be the keeper at home. She’s the one who is called to “look well to the ways of her household” and make her husband’s life easier when he gets home from working hard all day. When roles are clearly defined, it’s easy to see who is responsible for picking things up off the floor, cleaning the bathrooms and kitchens, and organizing so everything is neat and tidy.

Don’t allow these “annoyances” to destroy your marriage, dear women. Remember that the greatest of all is the servant of all! Be thankful that you have a husband to care for, to clean up after, and a home to keep clean and tidy. While you are being thankful for all of these things, you won’t have time to complain and allow little things to steal your joy. You will learn to live a selfless life instead of a selfish life.

For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another.
Galatians 5:13

23 thoughts on “Things Women Can’t Stand About Living With Men

  1. In a marriage, one must pick their battles! There are plenty of things you do, ladies, that your husband doesn’t like either! Too much hair in the drain, the meal didn’t taste quite right, the kids were running around and it was a bit messy and chaotic at times when he returned, that haircut is secretly one he doesn’t think is all that flattering on you but won’t hurt your feelings, etc… Getting into a major fight over some left over trash or clutter is not worth impacting a relationship! Just clean it up and move on! Just as he did when you didn’t quite get that recipe the way he liked it, or that haircut, or when he had to deal with any little annoyance you give him, but chose to let it go, out o the greater love of your marriage! That said, hubby shouldn’t be a total pig and trash the house, not caring for the work you do to clean it all, but a little clutter is not the end of the universe! Marriage is a give and take, not one where both need to be identical in compromise and roles, but one of complementing each other’s weaknesses with each other’s strengths. He clutters a bit, you clean it up. You forget something, or are off your game one day too, he gives you grace and patience. Pick your battles and don’t lose sight of what made you love each other enough to spend your lives together! The home is the wife’s domain, but it’s his house too!!! You SHARE your home, it’s not just a woman’s play thing to be governed by the female whim only!

  2. Hi stranger, I know the dynamics of every are different with different circumstances but the principles should be the same. Let’s look at the happiest of homes. What are the principles. I believe it would be respect for each other and the differences in in being husband and wife and loving and appreciating each other and the value they bring into the home. As a Christian husband I’ve am learning to love and respect my wife for what she brings because truly loving our savior is looking after my own heart first. Wives or husbands should not be offended by this post because it’s factually the truth as scripture teaches.

  3. I was just thinking after reading this how I use to focus on these little things that simply do not matter. The thought that came to me while reading this was Oh how foolish those things are. I am Grateful for my husband that has provided me a home and food. He works hard to provide for our large family. He takes our family to church and is saved by Gods grace through the blood of Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour. He is not addicted to pornograpy, he does not drink, or is not abusive. He is so many good things I cannot name them all! The Good so much out ways the little things that some may think are bad. He has been having health issues that we are are concerned about. He is 42 years old. He was diagnosed with rocky mtn. a blood disease from a tick 7- 9 years ago. He is also having other health issues. We will be going to the Mayo Clinic in October. We are praying for healing . Whatever maybe wrong.

    I guess what I’m trying to say is his health means more to me than the socks on the floor the dishes not washed or the trash not being taken out. Please wives focus on what matters, your children being saved, your husband and your children’s health, being a good and obedient wife. Keepers at home(keeping the home clean). If you have children let them help with the chores.(Not nagging your husband to do it). God is merciful and good and can help you with all these things. Believe! 1 Peter 5:7
    Casing all your care upon him;for he careth for you.

    1. Amen, Karla! There are SO many more important things in life than if a husband picks up after himself or not. This is why God created Eve – to be Adam’s help meet and all of us who are married were created to be our husband’s help meet which includes willingly cleaning up after him. There are so many more important things in life as you are experiencing. There are women destroying their marriages over their husbands’ messiness. It’s tragic.

  4. Thank you for this wonderful reminder! It is so easy for me to forget and start believing lies of the world (imported directly from Hollywood) curtesy of years of indoctrination

  5. Well Lori I am conflicted here. I do not nag my husband (one reminder and then that is it). I am blessed he is not a slob. However, I do plan on teaching my sons to clean up after themselves. No, they will most likely not be scrubbing the bathroom floors, but they CAN learn to wipe pee off a toilet seat and toothpaste off the counter. In my opinion, that is just good manners, not “housekeeping.” One way women can “win him without a word” is to teach their sons cleanly habits (put things away where they belong, clean up bodily fluids, pick up after yourself after snacks etc) and praise them for it within earshot of their husband — that’s what my mother did with my 3 brothers. I do recommend that women who are dating really scope out their boyfriends habits before marriage if they are neat freaks. I am one (cleanliness next to Godliness) and I would not have continued a relationship with my boyfriend if I didnt notice his clean car, clean apartment, and his parents clean home.

    1. Yes, it’s wonderful that you are teaching your sons to clean up after yourself but many sons are not being taught this, Kate. So your daughters would not marry a godly man because he was messy? It’s one way she can serve him. There are many more important things in marrying a man rather than if he is a slob or not, that’s for sure. I told my daughters to marry a godly, hardworking man! These qualities far surpass a man who cleans up after himself.

      1. It is by far not the most important quality, but I considered my neatness part of my personality and would not want to marry someone I would be annoyed with before we were even married!

    2. “I [..] notice his clean car, clean apartment, and his parents clean home” .. This is very wise.

      Shepherding was the profession of the only recorded man after God’s own heart. There is much that can be learned here.

      When a shepherd today evaluates sheepdog puppies, they largely ignore them. (Ignore puppies!? Say what!)
      A seasoned handler will ask to see the stud and the bitch. He will observe the health and wellness of both parents, and observe their behavior as well. Only after establishing healthy genetics and behavior will he turn his attention to the litter. That’s if he even gets that far: often there are issues with one of the parents (eg. hip dysplasia, non-responsiveness to a master’s call etc). In this case, he turns his heel and saves his choice for another litter sired by a different stud, birthed by a different bitch.
      Assuming both parents pass muster, he will then observe for how the puppies interact with the mother and father. Does the father have any preferences? Does the mother? Is there any puppy that is being ‘babied’ or is there one constantly being reprimanded?

      [..] Be as shrewd as serpents, and innocent as doves (Matt 10:16).

      A highly discriminating eye is a blessing. There are no promises in how these puppies will turn out, so we study indicators from the health and behavior of their genetic lineage, and the interactions between. When evaluating a suitor, there is much to learn here.

      If the parents are both slobs, he/she will most likely be the same way. If the parents are lukewarm in their walk, it is a strong possibility he/she is as well.

      Does a daughter honor her father? Does a son treat his mother with patience? Does a mother delight in being a strong helpmeet to her husband? Does a father have a strong history of constant employment? More in life is absorbed than taught, especially within one’s personal life.

      Of course, an apple may fall far from the tree, which can go both ways. A dysfunctional marriage could be recognized as such by the child. A strong father and humble mother could be taken for granted.

      Using the family (God’s gift to humanity as a way to better understand the marriage that the church has with Christ) as a metric to establish suitability as a mate is a very smart place to start.

  6. It’s interesting to hear a wife (no kids) say, “You put your dishes in the dishwasher and leave dirty ones in the sink. Why not put them in the dishwasher?”

    “First off honey, if you did your dishes there wouldn’t be any in the sink. Second if I said something like that you would lose your mind.”

    The gaul she had to not think before she speak is mind boggling.

    I am capable of doing my dishes, she isn’t capable of doing hers? Not to mention basically telling me to do them?

    The female perogative was and still is strong in her.

    I helped around the house until I finally caught on that I was paying the bills and doing half of her work and begged for mercy sex. Now I don’t do anything… Yep, she made her bed and she can now Lynne in it.

    1. Wow…I’m sorry to hear that. When I was growing up it never occurred to me that my dad did chores around the house. He didn’t have to, but sometimes he would clean the kitchen or cook a meal (he’s a great cook!) plus keeping up the lawn, car repairs, and the garage stuff. This was all while working 12 hour days. He’s also still the higher earner between him and my mom, so he gets full respect when it comes to not being required to do household chores. When I got older I understood why this was so: he pays the bills and works harder than all of us combined in our house, that’s why lol!

  7. My husband doesn’t do any of those things! He doesn’t make a mess in the bathroom, leave the seat up, etc. He automatically puts his dishes in the dishwasher, as well. He’s very neat. Neither I nor his mother had a thing to do with this. He learned everything from his older brother. As his brother explained it to me, “I left him alone as the youngest with 5 older sisters. I didn’t want him to die. They would’ve killed him if he would’ve been a slob in the bathroom!” It still makes me laugh. He says he’s done it all his life and “it takes me 3 extra seconds. It’s ridiculous not to.”

  8. “It’s 2018!”

    Nowadays, this will go over about as well as trying to float a rock on water. But I would be interested in making it a reality, if that is possible…

  9. After 25 plus years of marriage, I have learned to let the small things go. Why get angry and upset about trivial issues like an tea bag left in the sink or a messy garage? I do my work and don’t stress about these things. I also don’t stress when my husband is tired and cranky and fusses about small stuff like a missing remote control or a misplaced item. He isn’t actually mad at me despite the harsh tone and I don’t need to defend myself, just give him some grace and space. Usually he apologizes a few minutes later for losing his temper. He works hard to support our family and is working on a degree as well as a full-time job. The least I can do is smooth things for him at home.

  10. My husband doesn’t do any of those 5 things. I can’t help but think that if those are the worst things a man does, their women are pretty lucky.

    As for the last thing, taking too long to do anything, why doesn’t the woman just do whatever it is she wants done herself? That’s what I do. I’m perfectly capable of doing pretty much everything my husband can do. Nagging men to do something never works. Just do it yourself! Maybe he can do it quicker or better, but doing it yourself has got to be better than nagging him. And normally, when my husband sees me with the ladder or power tools he comes along and gives me a hand.

    1. KAK, exactly! My husband can sometimes be a perfectionist with things, but if i think i can do it, i just get stared myself and he takes over. Lol. Seems to do the trick

  11. Some of those five things used to happen in my marriage and I used to stress about them. But as I began to see marriages strained and crumbling around me over alcohol, gambling or infidelity, I decided that if my husband was home long enough to leave some socks laying around, if he was home for a meal instead of out drinking or gambling (or worse!), then I was one of the lucky ones. I love it when he helps with things like cooking because he’s such a great cook and we have fun in the kitchen…but I don’t expect it. Look at the whole picture and think what life could be like. I’ll take the little messes that can be easily and joyfully fixed.

  12. This article is so great and has freed me from so much resentment from the past! I do have one question that might seem nitpicky. Is the wife also soley responsible for the outdoor chores as well? When I’m trying to mow, weedeat, prune, etc as well as keep up with maintenance, i feel so overwhelmed. Last summer the inside of the house fell apart while i was re-caulking windows, painting trim amd and staining the fence. And if these are my responsibility, i can handle it. I just want to be rid of resentment toward my hubby in this area.

    1. Have you asked your husband to help you with the outside maintenance and if not, have you spoken to him about needing help since you’re struggling keeping up with everything? Maybe, he won’t mind you hiring a handyman. I would say your first priority is in your home and if you have children, can you get them to help with everything?

  13. Good post! I have a question. My husband is good at cleaning things, and he’s good at getting into nooks and crannies that I have trouble with. What do I do if my husband likes doing things like cleaning the kitchen, tidying up, or even just likes helping me? Should I stop him because of what scripture says? Am I allowed to stop him (because the Lord says that the husband’s word is law in the home, and I really trust mine!)?

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