Strong Single Women Advice?

Strong Single Women Advice?

“Strong Single Women: If people tell you that guys are intimidated by you, don’t mind them. Cuz, you are not going to marry that kind of man, else you will crush him and emasculate him. The man you will marry won’t be intimidated by you, but love your strength, because he will also be strong and secure in himself and God.”

This was a meme being passed around social media by a Christian woman. Do you think this is good advice to single women? I asked the wise women in the chat room…

Heather replied, “A woman who ‘crushes and emasculates’ any man for any reason is not a strong woman. If she was actually ‘strong and secure in herself and God,’ then strength would be expressed as love, faithfulness, and gentleness.”

Lindsay answered, “This is the kind of silly nonsense perpetually single harpies tell themselves to feel better about not being able to find a man who wants them. ‘It’s just because you’re strong and he’s intimidated by you. He’s not man enough for you.’

“No, you’re a pill and nobody wants to live with that. Feminism turns women into horrible, selfish people.

“Note: There are women who are single far longer than they would like to be who are not feminist harpies, but they generally don’t go around blaming all the men and claiming they’re ‘strong’ and so men are intimidated by them.”

Nancy responded, “It’s true, but not in the way they mean it. You will crush and emasculate your husband if you’re not strong in your submissive role as a true woman of God according to scripture. Proverbs 31 woman, Titus 2, 1 Timothy 2:11-15, and Proverbs 12:4 strength, not what the world calls strength for women.”

Meredith wrote, “Exactly. If a ‘strong’ woman is crushing and emasculating her husband, she is not strong but rather rebellious. The truly strong woman will be in submission to God and her husband and will joyfully live out the role God has given to women. Her strength will be a continual blessing to her husband, not something that intimidates him.”

Lastly, Whitney thought that this is what keeps “strong” women single.

My opinion is that most men aren’t as intimidated by women as women think they are. The way to not intimidate men is to be kind, cheerful, and friendly. Secondly, our strength comes from the Lord and He asks that we have meek and quiet spirits. We aren’t strong in ourselves. We are only strong in Him. She never mentions this in her advice to young women. I don’t think this advice is going to help any young women find good and godly husbands.

A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband.
Proverbs 12:4

33 thoughts on “Strong Single Women Advice?

  1. Being loud and having that ms independent attitude is unattractive. I think the issue is a lot of woman are being influenced by the world instead of the word. I agree with Meredith and Nancy’s comments.

  2. Women are so easily deceived and most often…… they just deceive themselves (and each other). Without a men in their lives (fathers then husbands) to lead then and guide them, most women are like “… children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming.”

    It’s this “Lindsay answered, “This is the kind of silly nonsense perpetually single harpies tell themselves to feel better about not being able to find a man who wants them.”

    And this “Meredith wrote, “Exactly. If a ‘strong’ woman is crushing and emasculating her husband, she is not strong but rather rebellious. The truly strong woman will be in submission to God and her husband and will joyfully live out the role God has given to women. Her strength will be a continual blessing to her husband, not something that intimidates him.”

    And this “Secondly, our strength comes from the Lord and He asks that we have meek and quiet spirits.” that the Bible says “which is precious in the sight of God.”, and as John MacArthur has said, “every man’s dream”.

    To all the so called “strong single women”; you don’t intimidate men, they just don’t find you attractive and they certainly don’t want to have to spend the rest of their lives contending with your prideful, rebellious spirit.

  3. Women who glory in how strong they are…aren’t.

    I appreciate the comment from Nancy regarding true feminine strength and also the verse from the Bible in Proverbs 31: “She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms” {verse 17}.

    Now that’s real strength! 🙂

  4. Perhaps you wouldn’t mind praying for me that God would give me a wife that is as intelligent as you are and also otherwise meet for me? Otherwise I won’t have long left here.

  5. “Strong women” aren’t strong, they’re in the way and refuse to move and that’s why they stay single. Men are not interested in or dependent on the kinds of social webs and networks that women build around each-other and while “strong” woman tactics can work to manipulate and influence other women in their web it just annoys men who are happy to let dead weight lay rather than be burdened by it. A man can convince himself to support almost any kind of woman under the sun despite the consequences, dont reward that decision by stabbing him even whole he carries you, he will eventually let go for a lighter load.

  6. Oh, my goodness, YES. The whole “strong woman” thing stands for “loud, opinionated, and generally around-around unpleasant.” No sensible man wants that!

  7. Single women are / or should be looking forward to and preparing for marriage and motherhood. They should be protected by and under the authority of there parents and should be modest and quiet – not ‘strong’ in a loud, forthright and worldly sense.

  8. It is easy to put-down, but it takes strength to lift-up. Every good coach, manager and parent knows this. Women who crush and emasculate men are not strong, they are bullies. Truly strong women are strong enough to hold their tongues. Strong women inspire those around them, they are not soul-crushing harpies.

  9. I have been a stay at home wife for about a year now. Before that I had spent the majority of my adult life as one of these kind of women.
    But I opened my heart and the Lord transformed me.

    My advice for younger women, is, just dont go there! There is no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. The pot of gold truly is found in loving and caring for your husband and children. Resist the pressure of the world to be a “strong and independent woman”. Ugh! We hear that phrase ad nauseum!

    When we act like strong and independent women, we serve ourselves up to all kinds of burden and pressure. Allow a strong husband to take care of you instead!

    For those of you who are older, its never too late to start.

    Since becoming a stay at home wife, my husband has shared with me many conversations he’s had with his male co workers on this topic. He said they say things like, “Wow! You are a lucky man!”
    And, “how did you talk your wife into this!”
    And, “my wife would never give up her golf game for me, let alone her career!”

    How sad is all that?

    Men really do want a stay at home wife to love them and look after them.

  10. It’s astonishing how often I’ve heard rebellious women boast of their strength. Of course, they either have no husband, or a hen-pecked and emasculated one.

    And many women think it. I even had one woman, who was very willful, on a date, ask me if I was strong enough to control her. That was not what I was looking for in a wife, and judging by how many men she had in her past, and how she wanted to travel the world, there was no chance I wanted to spend my future with her. Also, she constantly fought to lead conversations, and was indignant about ideas she didn’t agree with being brought into the conversation.

    Teaching women to be strong and independent, without God and the leadership of men, is how we have 70% of single women voting Democrat, and the majority of married women too.

    Taking the vote away from women, would break the back of the wicked Democrat party, likely leading to the end of pornography, abortion, homosexuality, contraception, welfare, and a host of other evils.

  11. Dear Trey, unfortunately – and sad to say – while alot of women are whack, (just read a child abuse report from a job-related website) so many men are either worthless or next door to it. In other words, mighty slim pickings for even young slender single gals.

  12. It’s terrible advice. I think a major reason why women are less desirable for marriage is because they no longer act like true women because feminism tells them that femininity, submissiveness and motherhood equals weakness. I see this with practically all of my friends, they act as though they are the man in a relationship and they can’t find a guy who takes them seriously as a future wife. Personally I believe the problem starts the first time the woman “insists” on something. Stating your opinion to your husband is ok but if he disagrees you must except that. Women need to learn to appreciate that men have always done a good job at making decisions for us.

  13. The strongest women I know are those who have stayed by their husband’s sides through tragedy, heartbreak, immense loss, bankruptcy etc. Incredibly tough challenges that take immense inner strength to endure. These women stayed beside their husbands, supporting them, encouraging them, even though the going was tough. It takes strength to stay calm, gentle and faithful during a crisis.

    Stroppy single women aren’t strong in the ways that matter. NO man wants a woman he is going to be having to fight with all the time. He wants a woman – a strong woman – who is going to be beside him no matter what, and is going to be his gentle, submissive helpmeet even when the going gets tough.

  14. One of the women I follow on Twitter (indeed, this was the main reason I decided to follow her) wrote in her bio, “Married to my best friend.” I really liked that. I have no idea what her overall political/religious views are, except that she shares my belief that all people deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, except if they forfiet that – like Magda Goebbels or Anne Coulter – both of whom give me the creeps, Big Time.

  15. Sounds like they are trying to make themselves feel better for not being in a relationship or married. Maybe you’re just undesirable due to your selfish, feminist attitude!

  16. ” To all the so called “strong single women”; you don’t intimidate men, they just don’t find you attractive and they certainly don’t want to have to spend the rest of their lives contending with your prideful, rebellious spirit. ”

    This x1000. It is trying to play the man in a relationship, when the relationship demands a woman. Of what value is a relationship between a man and someone attempting to be a man?
    I don’t care how well- or most often not- you can do the tasks of a man, I care how well you can do the tasks of the woman.
    A car is of no value if it can only turn left, or *more* left.

  17. Sue, take caution when the optics control of media is spinning a narrative. The appearance of truth is not truth. The volume of a narrative is not correlation with sample size.

    http://www.realsexism.com/
    ” The truth is never never quite as it seems ” – Unknown
    Be discerning. 1 Co 10:5.

    We live in a heavily feminized society. Take care that the perspective of males being worthless is not actually feminine entitlement.

  18. Yes. The strongest woman I’ve ever seen was on a talk show about 7 years ago. Her husband was good looking, had been in the NBA and coached pro basketball as well. He cheated on her constantly starting on their honeymoon. He risked his and her health with STDs some of which she was hospitalized for. He was a porn addict and would spend hours fulfilling that on a regular basis. No one in their right mind would have told her to stay with this man, but she did. I believe they had over 4 kids too.

    At the time of the show they were in their sixties I would guess. Her husband was a penitent man. He was completely different than he had been. He became a Christian and was winning the battle against porn. He was on the show with his wife warning up and coming hot shots against the path he had taken. I don’t know that I would have had the strength his lovely wife had to endure the years of his rebellion but seeing her then by his side with him giving credit to her for her enduring love and devotion to him and their children was a picture of real strength I will never forget.

  19. Women are supposed to be weak, not strong. Feminism has taught women to try to be like men. We are the weak ones. Feminism has ruined this country!

  20. Most of the married women I know are very strong. I guess I am confused why any man would want a weak woman.

    My husband expects me to labor and bear our children naturally, raise them while he’s at work, homeschool, do strenuous chores and yard work, take care of the children even when I am sick, tired, or greiving, bounce back mentally after miscarriages, diet and workout to stay fit, get up before the rest of the family, always be sexually availalbe, etc.

    Not to mention I have gracefully overcome embarrassing issues in our marriage, supported my husband’s decisions, and have made many sacrifices for the best of my family.

    I am not sure how a weak woman would accomplish this. God gives me strength, but I would never, and my husband would never, call me a “weak” woman.

  21. I agree with you that many men are worthless or very near to it. But have you looked at the reasons why? In my country (NZ) it’s because they don’t have God in their life. They’re without father’s, or their fathers are addicted to drugs and alcohol and unemployed losers. They have no decent role models. They dropped out of school. They’re living in poverty. For a man with a background like this, it’s pretty hard for him to be anything else but worthless.

    BUT when I look at the men in my church, both old and young, they are the exact opposite of worthless. They’re hardworking, upright, kind, respectable, faithful, good men. They’re good husbands, or will make good husbands one day.

    Worldly men are worthless because of sin, ultimately. And of course God-fearing men sin too, but their faith still stands strong and they still have that strength deep within them making them very desirable men.

    If you’re looking for a husband and you’re looking outside of a good church, you’re looking in the wrong place.

  22. I completed a half marathon run in San Diego this morning. Women ARE strong to endure childbirth (much easier than today’s run in my opinion!). I never felt like a weak woman in that sense. I suppose it’s a different kind of strength. I’ve always felt strong and secure in my faith in Christ, thus submitting to my husband in our relationship. We use our own strengths-me with my organizational skills and childbearing/child raising and him with his physical strength to glorify God through our family.

  23. I’ve been trying to find a man to become a housewife too since my mid twenties (just didn’t meet anyone before then). And have been praying for a spouse since I was 18. I’m in my 30s now and still single. What am I supposed to do? Is Gods plan for me to be single and working or married. I keep praying and trying to find a husband…

  24. Irene,
    I love the fact you have been praying! God rewards faithfulness, so be encouraged! I have a true story to share with you about a man who installed our floors a few years back. He had recently married the girl of his dreams, they were both in their thirties when they met. He had never gotten serious about a girl before his wife, in fact rarely dated because he did NOT want a career woman and stayed focused in finding one that wanted to stay home. Meanwhile the woman he ended up marrying also was committed to finding a man who wanted a wife at home. So she stayed under her father. (They lived miles away in separate towns). A mutual friend discovered this fact and introduced them. What a wonderful couple these two make! They now have a little boy.
    Good men are out there! Just a thought, if you haven’t already, possibly start preparing a hope chest? I am praying for you.
    Robin

  25. My former roommate graduated from an ivy league school in the hopes of getting married after graduation. After a broken engagement she entered graduate school to study medieval history. She’s still struggling to finish her dissertation. I asked her why she would get a PhD if she didn’t really want to teach. She said that when she was in undergrad she had hoped to have MRS degree by the time she was 30. She’s homeschooled and is 1 of 9. She’s not career driven. She’s debt free because she got full rides for both of her degree programs. And she’s a virgin. And she’s pretty. All she wants is to be a housewife. I know plenty of women who have a desire to be housewives. Most of them have been forced to get into careers because they’re still single. I think half the women I know had hoped to be wives and mothers by the age of 30. I myself have been waiting and I’m pushing 40 and I’m just an ordinary secretary. None of us are feminists. All of us are conservative and live chaste lives. So what advice is there for us? Besides praying and having faith.

  26. There are Christian dating sites. Be up front you want to be a homemaker and don’t believe in sex outside of marriage .

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